What is the right reason to miss someone?

[mlcj69]

I've been recently dumped. Was in a long distance relationship. Started talking 2.5 years ago and met in person 2 years ago this summer.

 

I was looking forward to this summer so much because I was planning so many great things and this can finally be the time were we show our true affection. (sex, or pretty close to it). She and I both wanted to. But couldnt because of privacy issues and over protective father. She became distant from me and I really think that is the reason why. We wanted things we couldnt do :/

 

I feel so let down because most likely this wont happen because she might be with someone else by then or have been with :/ not only that but she was really the only person I spoke to and my first true best friend and love :[ This last visit was distant so she has been thinking this for a while knowing we would have privacy issues on our visit. Thats my theory.

 

 

It's only been a week, but I really miss her :/ and shes enjoying herself hanging out with this guy friend and most likely flirting with him and stuff. She SAYS she doesnt do anything but just hang out. But I'm sure something will happen.

 

I know eventually it would fade, but what is the real reason to miss someone? Should I miss being with them, or miss our talks about being sweet, or miss our affection we show each other in person, or miss seeing there face and laughing and having a good time in skype?

 

I never realized how much I depended on her for my happiness even though things got stale at a distance.

 

What SHOULD I miss about her to prove that it was true love and not just friends or lust etc.

Edited February 16, 2013 by mlcj69

[mammasita]

I think the issue is that your happiness was dependent upon her. You can miss her for whatever reasons you want. Nobody can tell you what's right or wrong.

 

Focus on your happiness and depending on yourself, nobody else - especially not her, for it.

[TaraMaiden]

What do you mean, "What should you miss....?"

 

Having her in your life, I guess, would be a start.

 

What DON'T you miss?

And is it of greater significance than what you DO miss.....?

 

I'm sorry, I can't get my head around this question...

 

WTF....?

[mlcj69]

I think the issue is that your happiness was dependent upon her. You can miss her for whatever reasons you want. Nobody can tell you what's right or wrong.

 

Focus on your happiness and depending on yourself, nobody else - especially not her, for it.

 

 

I think I feel so let down now it that I wont be able to experience those things with her again. And its really making me depressed because I know I wont find anyone, at least right now, to do those things :/ I feel I need someone to love me and show affection to me and no one can.

 

Our next visit seemed so close and I really wanted her to try to wait it out to see if her are the same while we are actually together

[LostGirl11]

I've been recently dumped. Was in a long distance relationship. Started talking 2.5 years ago and met in person 2 years ago this summer.

 

I was looking forward to this summer so much because I was planning so many great things and this can finally be the time were we show our true affection. (sex, or pretty close to it). She and I both wanted to. But couldnt because of privacy issues and over protective father. She became distant from me and I really think that is the reason why. We wanted things we couldnt do :/

 

I feel so let down because most likely this wont happen because she might be with someone else by then or have been with :/ not only that but she was really the only person I spoke to and my first true best friend and love :[ This last visit was distant so she has been thinking this for a while knowing we would have privacy issues on our visit. Thats my theory.

 

 

It's only been a week, but I really miss her :/ and shes enjoying herself hanging out with this guy friend and most likely flirting with him and stuff. She SAYS she doesnt do anything but just hang out. But I'm sure something will happen.

 

I know eventually it would fade, but what is the real reason to miss someone? Should I miss being with them, or miss our talks about being sweet, or miss our affection we show each other in person, or miss seeing there face and laughing and having a good time in skype?

 

I never realized how much I depended on her for my happiness even though things got stale at a distance.

 

What SHOULD I miss about her to prove that it was true love and not just friends or lust etc.

 

Who do you want to prove this to? The girl that holds hands with other men then takes them for a dance?

[mlcj69]

What do you mean, "What should you miss....?"

 

Having her in your life, I guess, would be a start.

 

What DON'T you miss?

And is it of greater significance than what you DO miss.....?

 

I'm sorry, I can't get my head around this question...

 

WTF....?

 

 

Im asking if maybe it was lust, not love, or something else that i dont know, because I would be so hopeful we would take it to the next level next visit and lead myself on telling me it would happen, and it wont. I obviously enjoyed my time with her besides sexual things. But since we are at that age that we need to express our feelings sexually, she just wasnt into me anymore.

 

I really dont even know. The main reason im posting on here is just to get my feelings out because ive exhausted all my other resources :/ i feel like im just bothering them with my problems.

Edited February 17, 2013 by mlcj69

[TaraMaiden]

Ok.....

 

When someone forms a significant part of your life, you'll very often lose your appetite, have a hollow feeling in your belly, (just under the diaphragm) and a feeling of apathy, malaise and listlessness.

The sex won't be uppermost in your mind. Their mere physical absence and unavailability will gnaw at you more.

 

Men very often find it hard to masturbate when they have broken up with someone they love deeply.

 

 

If you miss her in a 'lustful' sense, it's possible the depth of your feelings wasn't as significant as you may have thought.

 

Just throwing in some theoretical thoughts here....

[mlcj69]

Ok.....

 

When someone forms a significant part of your life, you'll very often lose your appetite, have a hollow feeling in your belly, (just under the diaphragm) and a feeling of apathy, malaise and listlessness.

The sex won't be uppermost in your mind. Their mere physical absence and unavailability will gnaw at you more.

 

Men very often find it hard to masturbate when they have broken up with someone they love deeply.

 

 

If you miss her in a 'lustful' sense, it's possible the depth of your feelings wasn't as significant as you may have thought.

 

Just throwing in some theoretical thoughts here....

 

 

 

Well ya I really don't want to eat and have that feeling all the time and just down and not horny. Not that sex isn't on my mind, because it's really not, I just want that closeness we once had when we were together and just talking :/ I can't talk to someone the way I used to talk to her because she was more than a friend.

[RespectfullyAlone]

Ok.....

 

When someone forms a significant part of your life, you'll very often lose your appetite, have a hollow feeling in your belly, (just under the diaphragm) and a feeling of apathy, malaise and listlessness.

The sex won't be uppermost in your mind. Their mere physical absence and unavailability will gnaw at you more.

 

Men very often find it hard to masturbate when they have broken up with someone they love deeply.

 

 

If you miss her in a 'lustful' sense, it's possible the depth of your feelings wasn't as significant as you may have thought.

 

Just throwing in some theoretical thoughts here....

Wonderfully put and describes exactly what I have been going through. I can sleep now and have my appetite back, but I still have the apathy, anger, malaise and listlessness. I don't care about anything, no goals, no desire to want to better myself. What's the point. I don't miss the sex as much as I miss just being with her, communicating together, getting those awesome txts that brighten up your day. Setting a time to see each other, planning things. That's what I miss.