Standard-Fare Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 I've been broken up with my ex for over a year. On the surface, I was able to "move on" after a few months, but he was always in my heart and mind. Ironically it was when I started dating others that things got bad. I felt nothing with anyone else, hated kissing them, hated sleeping with them, etc. I started realizing some of the big mistakes I'd made in the old relationship and the ways I'd underestimated my ex. I finally decided I needed to honor my feelings and tell him I still loved him. But when I tried to open the doors of communication over the course of a couple months, he never responded in a satisfying way. So finally I did the great "cleanse" -- deleting his phone number, blocking him on Facebook, deleting old emails. But I sent him one final email. I was genuine and told him I had feelings for him, but knew I had to move on for both of our sake's. I promised to stay out of his life and apologized for bothering him. I committed to that. But about three weeks later, I got an unexpected call from him. We talked for hours, and very sincerely. We both acknowledged that we missed each other, and he told me that I could come by to see him (he now lives an hour away) when I felt like it. When I did, we had a wonderful evening. We had dinner and I stared into his eyes the whole time and felt insane love. We slept together and he held me all night. I actually started crying and told him it felt like "coming home." He told me I'd been in his heart as well. The next week, I was ready to stop playing any games and just dive in go gung-ho. I was hunting for apartments near his work so we could spend more time together, etc. But he was flaky in communicating with me, and cancelled on an event that was important to me... always had an excuse that I couldn't argue with. But I finally called him on his behavior via text. My text was admittedly b*tchy, and he had a bad response and ultimately dropped out of communication. This was at the start of January. I've tried a couple times to be back in touch, saying that I at least needed a conversation. No response. But my love had been rekindled so strongly that I felt I needed to take action. On Valentine's Day, I bought roses and chocolate and jumped into my car to head up to his place. I wanted to tell him I was in love with him and that we should stop the bull**** and be together, and see if I saw love in his eyes. P.S. I am not a romantic at all and this is not the type of thing I would ever do normally. For me, it was a leap of faith. At the start of my drive, I texted him telling him I was on the road and that I hoped we could have a Valentine's Day dinner together. He responded only by the time I was in his city, telling me he was busy at the moment. I said him I'd wait, and I did so at a bar. An hour later, I got a text: "I wouldn't wait." Then "Why did you drive up here?" I got the picture, and heartbroken, got back into my car to head home. But he texted me again, asking: "Where are you?" which I took as a sign he did want to meet after all, so I turned around to head back -- and got severely lost in a bad part of the city. My GPS was broken. I finally called him because I needed help. He gave me directions ... to the highway home. I said: "So I guess I can't come over?" and he confirmed to me that he was on a date. He was slurring drunk and said: "Why wouldn't that even occur to you?" I hung up on him. After my drive home, my stomach was so in knots that I threw up. I've been in bad shape since. LOVE IS SUCH A B*TCH.
TaraMaiden Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 No, Love isn't a bitch. Love is wonderful. This wasn't love, because it wasn't reciprocated. Three words, heavy with wisdom: Never. Go. Back. I'm sorry you went through that experience... "If it ain't broke, why fix it?" can be equally pertinent as - "If it's broke, don't even try to fix it."
d0620 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 It appears that Valentine's Day, lets you know where you stand..
salem mark Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 Tara she didnt say who dumped who, very important here, agree? 1
Hopeful714 Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 At this point who cares who initially dumped who. She made an effort for this guy and he slept with her and cuddled. Then she got the cold shoulder. The girl goes up there and he's on a Valentines date. I would say that's enough to say game over. NC
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