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Have you ever dumped someone before they dumped you to avoid heartache?


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Posted

Lately my gf has been acting a bit distant... she's not as eager to see me, real short... i've been in this situation before and I can usually tell when the end is near. Have any of you ever dumped someone before they dumped you to save some heart ache? Not saying that it will... but I feel like it could turn the tables on her a bit and I could leave with my head held high by not giving her the satisfaction to leave me.

 

Just looking for some past experiences that maybe could shed some light on things as to whether I should do it or not.

Posted

Just walk away... it won't save you from any pain or turbulence

 

One upping someone isn't going to help or make you feel better

Posted (edited)
Lately my gf has been acting a bit distant... she's not as eager to see me, real short... i've been in this situation before and I can usually tell when the end is near. Have any of you ever dumped someone before they dumped you to save some heart ache? Not saying that it will... but I feel like it could turn the tables on her a bit and I could leave with my head held high by not giving her the satisfaction to leave me.

 

Just looking for some past experiences that maybe could shed some light on things as to whether I should do it or not.

 

I knew someone who did that.

 

He regretted it for something like eight years, and was one of the most bitter, horrible men I've ever known.

 

*edit. they were living together, though. He was jealous and didn't trust her to not leave him. She was the gorgeous type, who would be surrounded by men when he walked away for a few minutes.

Edited by Anela
Posted

I was in that situation once. just a bit different. we had a fight and didnt talk for a week. I wrote a letter and brought it to her and left. it was explaining what I felt and basically saying that I want things to work out.

 

if she will dump you then so be it, but try to fight. people give up so easily. dont come to conclusions so quickly. your relationship might have a chance. try to work it out. dont wait till she gets too cold and does walk away.

Posted

I don't get the whole "dump him/her before they dump you" mentality out there. Or even if they try to get the other person to dump them by being all crazy or weird acting. It's a really loser thing to do. You're not going to look good to your friends for doing it either. You come off as being emotionally abusive and selfish and rotten to the core. What woman would want to be with you if you get street cred for doing this? Not many.

 

As to her distance, say you want to have a chat with her about some things. If she tells you that she's not sure how she feels or if she has other things going on, or if she's considering breaking up, then it's better to get that out in the open rather than be left hanging. No one likes ending things, but then again it's better to do it now rather than later.

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