miklos Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 im just crying and crying on my couch at home. I miss my ex so much..... i need to see a counselor. im in so much pain. i miss him so much. 20 days of No Contact. I want to call him so bad. i miss him.
Author miklos Posted February 16, 2013 Author Posted February 16, 2013 Ive been crying for 20 min. i hate this.
creighton0123 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 Change what you're doing right now. Go for a walk. If that's not possible, put on some happy music. I like Caro Emerald for that. Dance a bit or pace and focus on calm breathing. Don't break NC. Let yourself naturally feel better. Don't force yourself to stop crying. Just do something different to draw you slowly out of the mourning state of mind.
Author miklos Posted February 16, 2013 Author Posted February 16, 2013 I feel way better. I am actually going out tonight with some friends and meeting a new guy. I dont know if that is healthy as I obviously still have feelings for my ex. Thank you for your advice.
Nasher Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 We all have felt like that, the pangs of want and desperation of needing them in your arms. It's bloody tough and heart wrenching! Getting yourself out around people is the best idea. I found socialising so empty the first month or so, I would always think I'd rather be with her. How sad is that? But it just shows its a normal emotion of missing somebody. How long have you two been broken up? The first twenty days is pretty hard, I'm on about forty now and I just can't stop wondering how she is. But it does get easier you'll see. Maybe you should rethink jumping into something with a guy right now but nothing wrong with getting to know someone as long as its for the right reasons As creighton0123 says you've just got to keep preoccupied and let the desperation pass. I know things wont feel as good right now but just give yourself time, don't be hard on yourself either and you'll find in another twenty days that the feelings will get easier. Each day at a time. I started counselling myself because of my breakup and I wasn't sure what to expect. So far two meetings in I feel better about my life and I've realised my problems are more internal and not just about her. Don't get me wrong I'm still hurting, but it's so nice to have a stranger to verbally vomit all the stuff in your head to. No judgement, no advice but sound feedback. Sometimes that's all we need. So I would definitely recommend one if you don't have enough or the right type of support around you.
stevie_23 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 Also take some comfort (if you can) in the knowledge that it's ok to have those moments of deep despair and desperate unhappiness, because they WILL pass. And they will get less and less as time goes on. That may be scary in a way, because the more time that passes and the more your emotional state and happiness improve, that means it really is over, but unless you want to go backwards, going forwards is the only way now, I'm afraid. Yes, you miss him. I SO know how that feels. It breaks your heart all over again each and every time, on top of the constant heartbreaking ache you feel constantly already. But what do you miss exactly? Was everything perfect in your relationship? The fact he ended things would imply that no, it wasn't, and that's not your fault, it's not his fault, it's not even a fault at all. It just happens sometimes, and it's REALLY hard. But you will be ok. 1
Recommended Posts