Robertowenthebest Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 Hi Guys, I'm new here and looking for some advice, so I hope you don't mind if I ask away! Right, I've known this girl for a while, but we recently got back in contact. Our first "date" consisted of going for drinks in a nice bar, then went to a pub on the beach for hot drinks. The only trouble is, I'm worried she might have seen that as just being two friends catching up, and not a date! I'm going to ask her on a second date two weeks after the first one, and want to make her know it's a date, but without creeping her out or seeming too full on. I want to do something different, but need to account for possible poor weather and the fact that she can't walk far. Here's my idea, and I'd like to hear some feedback: I was thinking that I could pick her up, we'd drive to a little supermarket and choose some picnic food, then we'd drive to a quiet beach with the car park looking over it. We would then either have a picnic or a BBQ on the beach, by the car, or in the car depending on the weather and what she fancies doing. I'd take picnic chairs, a portable BBQ, picnic blanket, and a Thermos of hot chocolate or tea. Does that seem like a good idea, or is it too much for a second date/someone who might only see me as a friend?? Opinions/suggestions will be much appreciated!
Beachbabe9109 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 I think that sounds like a good idea. It's cute and does sound like a date. good luck
GMG90 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 Sounds like a fun time. It's nice and reasonable if you ask me ... sure she'll enjoy it
Author Robertowenthebest Posted February 17, 2013 Author Posted February 17, 2013 Thanks I'm now wondering how to ask her if she's up for it. I expect I'll text instead of call (these days I find calling seems a little too keen), but how much of the plan should I tell her?? Should I: -Tell her the whole idea -Tell her that I'll pick her up and leave the rest a surprise -or something in between those??
weee111 Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 Tell her that you want to spend the afternoon with her and have a picnic, and that you'll take care of the planning. Don't spill the whole idea up front, but if she wants to know where you are going (so she can tell someone) then obviously tell her.
RebelWithoutACause Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 I was thinking that I could pick her up, we'd drive to a little supermarket and choose some picnic food, then we'd drive to a quiet beach with the car park looking over it. We would then either have a picnic or a BBQ on the beach, by the car, or in the car depending on the weather and what she fancies doing. I'd take picnic chairs, a portable BBQ, picnic blanket, and a Thermos of hot chocolate or tea. The only way to make this any more full on is if you picked her up in a horse-drawn carriage. Yes, it is too full on for me. But I'm more of a laid back person.
ja123 Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 (edited) I agree with Barnacle-Bob. And to make her feel special, I think you should call not text. Texts are too impersonal, and can set you up for future miscommunication scenarios. Regarding your picnic idea (I love the idea, btw! ), but I'm wondering if that shouldn't be more for the 4-5 date. If you two really hit it off on the first date and felt extremely comfortable together, then, sure, it could work. But, it might be better to get to know her a bit more before doing something that seems so intimate. At this point, I'm assuming she doesn't know you well; therefore, she might feel uncomfortable sitting alone with you in the car. (You did mention weather concerns could have you eating in the car.) But if you're set on the picninc, you could say something along the lines of: "I was thinking of going for a nice drive and a picnic, and I'd love it if you'd join me." If it's for date 5, however, then you could not tell her your plans, and just surprise her with the picnic. Edited February 17, 2013 by ja123
Author Robertowenthebest Posted February 17, 2013 Author Posted February 17, 2013 The only way to make this any more full on is if you picked her up in a horse-drawn carriage. I agree with Barnacle-Bob. Regarding your picnic idea (I love the idea, btw! ), but I'm wondering if that shouldn't be more for the 4-5 date. If you two really hit it off on the first date and felt extremely comfortable together, then, sure, it could work. But, it might be better to get to know her a bit more before doing something that seems so intimate. At this point, I'm assuming she doesn't know you well; therefore, she might feel uncomfortable sitting alone with you in the car. (You did mention weather concerns could have you eating in the car.) Those were my concerns... I though it could seem a bit full on too, but I'm completely stuck as to what to do! I want to do something interesting, but there's not that much to do here, and she can't walk far. Seeing as we went for drinks last time, what would make a suitable second date?? Then I could save my beach idea for if things go any further!
ja123 Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 So, if you went for drinks last time, then why not take her for dinner? Also, where to you live ... the country? city? suburbs? And what common interests do you have?
Author Robertowenthebest Posted February 17, 2013 Author Posted February 17, 2013 Dinner is definitely a possibility, I just don't want to bore her. It is definitely on the cards though. We live in the country - she lives about 20 mins from me, and isn't far from a reasonable sized town. We're close to the coast and beaches. Common interests - I'm not sure, we just get on really well. We're both fairly intellectual, both like the outdoors but also like sitting at home, neither of us is really particularly "arty". She can't walk too far due to having had an operation on her feet (she can still walk a reasonable distance, but we couldn't for example go hiking!) If it helps with ideas, the temperature here is about 7 Celsius (45 Fahrenheit).
PogoStick Posted February 17, 2013 Posted February 17, 2013 That's a bit cold for a picnic especially if it turns out to be cooler that day. Find out what some of her interests are, theater or a concert, the zoo or art museum?
Author Robertowenthebest Posted February 17, 2013 Author Posted February 17, 2013 Yeah, I thought it may be a bit cold... There are no bands playing about the right time, the theater is too expensive and too far away, and she goes to the museum by herself quite often anyway. The zoo could be a possibility, but could be a little too much walking. I'm also thinking of being cheesy and possibly going bowling followed by a meal. She's really good fun, so bowling could be entertaining, then we could go for a nice meal to make up for the cheesyness, and talk a bit more seriously. What do y'all think??
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