monochromedreams Posted February 15, 2013 Posted February 15, 2013 Hi! This is my first post here, I just found out about these forums, so hi to everyone So here's my story: I am 24 years old, I went on my first date with this girl yesterday (we had previously IM'd eachother so we kind of already knew some of what we had in common and stuff), and I am not very experienced at dating (my previous relationships were kind of something that happened spontaneously and "in the moment"). I believe our date went really good, we had a lot of fun, had dinner and walked for a while. We spoke for hours, and I made her laugh a lot and also noticed her blushing and giggling at times which was super cute We had very interesting conversations on various topics, and maintained eye contact through most of the evening, and a smile on the face. She always seemed very interested in what I was saying as she would lean in and widen up her eyes and smile. Eventually she started playing with her hair, with her coat and touching her neck while talking to me. From previous experiences and advice given to me, I felt it was time to break the touch barrier, so I touched her slightly in the hand while making some kind of point. She did not seem to mind, so I did it once more. While leaving, I always held the door for her and gently followed her exiting the restaurant by placing my hand on her lower back. I tried to be all gentlemanly! (except in the car! I totally forgot I did not open the car door for her! Idiot! >_<) I did not, however, have the guts to try and hold her hand, as I was not 100% sure she was into me at that level, and did not want to ruin it or make things too awkward, as we were having so much fun together. So I drove her home, and she told me she had a lot of fun and wanted to repeat it soon, so we made plans for tomorrow, right there. So, tomorrow I am taking her for a walk at an amazing park we have here, and afterwards we are meeting some friends (of mine, she doesn't know them yet) for dinner, as I had already made plans with those friends, and asked her if she would like to come as I would love to have her company. Now, this time, during the walk in the park I want to try and hold hands! Since my previous relationships happened so quickly and spontaneously, I don't really know how to tackle this, or how to tell if she really is THAT into me that I can grab her hand without ruining everything! I REALLY like this girl! I've never met someone who I felt so compatible with. All night I felt like she completed me, it was really strange, I never felt that about anyone. I was wishing that night would never end! But alas, here I am, typing this, and not with her I am also taking her to a concert in 4 days. It's a very atmospheric Classical / Post-Rock band, those kinds of bands that give out that huge, emotional atmosphere, so I would like to be closer to her when we go there! And I think the next step should be the hand holding! I wanted to do it so much yesterday, but alas, I got really nervous! I did not want to ruin this! I feel like she's special. Also, I know that if I don't step up soon I might end up in what people call "the friendzone", as she might think I'm interested in her only as a friend. Any advice would be amazing! Thank you so much for reading! Monochrome
USCGAviator Posted February 15, 2013 Posted February 15, 2013 Just be a confident funny dude, keep the flirt level high and you'll do well without getting friend zoned. Don't lose control of your emotions and certainly don't tell her she completes you on the second date.
Author monochromedreams Posted February 15, 2013 Author Posted February 15, 2013 Just be a confident funny dude, keep the flirt level high and you'll do well without getting friend zoned. Don't lose control of your emotions and certainly don't tell her she completes you on the second date. Ha! Don't worry, I wouldn't say that! Thanks for the advice, I'll try to find an opening when it feels right!
MsSmurf Posted February 15, 2013 Posted February 15, 2013 Mr. Mono if this young lady agreed to a second and a third date with you then yes she likes you! Here's how you tell if it is ok to hold her hand....1) she is close enough to you that you could comfortably reach for her hand and 2) her hand is not in her pocket or holding something. It's that simple. As for the concert, it sounds like you'll be sitting and listening? All you have to do here is sit next to her and put your arm around her. She likes you so she'll lean in to signal that she likes being closer to you. Just take a deep breath and go for it, you'll be fine.
Author monochromedreams Posted February 15, 2013 Author Posted February 15, 2013 Mr. Mono if this young lady agreed to a second and a third date with you then yes she likes you! Here's how you tell if it is ok to hold her hand....1) she is close enough to you that you could comfortably reach for her hand and 2) her hand is not in her pocket or holding something. It's that simple. As for the concert, it sounds like you'll be sitting and listening? All you have to do here is sit next to her and put your arm around her. She likes you so she'll lean in to signal that she likes being closer to you. Just take a deep breath and go for it, you'll be fine. It's been especially cold these days, so if she has her hand out of the pocket that would be the biggest signal to go for it. I will definitely try! Also, the concert is standing up, but I guess the idea is the same, I will be next to her thanks a lot for the advice! This is really adorable. She's adorable! I feel so lucky that she agreed to go out with me again! Also, to kind of hint at her that I like her, I sent her a text after waking up saying I was thinking of her and how much fun we had. I was still kind of sleepy so did not really think that through so I started to panic a little bit that maybe that was a bit too forward haha, thankfully she replied and showed the same feeling. So that was a relief!
MsSmurf Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 It's been especially cold these days, so if she has her hand out of the pocket that would be the biggest signal to go for it. I will definitely try! Also, the concert is standing up, but I guess the idea is the same, I will be next to her thanks a lot for the advice! She's adorable! I feel so lucky that she agreed to go out with me again! Also, to kind of hint at her that I like her, I sent her a text after waking up saying I was thinking of her and how much fun we had. I was still kind of sleepy so did not really think that through so I started to panic a little bit that maybe that was a bit too forward haha, thankfully she replied and showed the same feeling. So that was a relief! Actually standing is better because then she can do a full body lean into you to get even closer. She could wrap her arms around you to get warmer too. Concerts tend to be crowded anyway so you could always use the excuse of trying to keep her from getting bumped into as the reason you put your arm around her. Have fun!
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