deeplyHurting Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 My now ex and i had been together for 12 years lived together for about 7 years in my moms basement. Recently he had been acting funny hiding his phone and facebook I knew something was up. Anyways after a few weeks of me asking and being annoying as to why he was hiding stuff from me he left for the weekend to "visit family" He came back all sad like told me he was not feeling well so i left him alone. The next day we are laying in bed cuddling and chatting and he gets all choked up like he can't speak I ask whats wrong he wont talk, finally I get him to talk he says I'm going to move back home (2 hours away) to get my life together I need to get my own place I can't stand living here with your mom and he called me lazy blah blah. Next day he packs all his stuff up gives me a huge kiss tells me everything will work out and this is not the end and that he loves me. I'm just crying my eyes out at this point begging him not to go ect. ect. he says I have to do this to make our lives better and that he needs to get himself together, because he is miserable living here. and then he talks about having a house together. and that he will build a special room for my hobby i have. So a few days we text he tells me he loves and hes going to come visit me all the time. But I have trust issues with him being so far away so he gives me the logins to all of his bank accounts and credit cards, I see some very suspicious charges on there so i ask about them and he makes up some very bad lies. so i ask for phone records password, when i logged in i see him texting someone non stop for about a month so i call the number and find out it a girl hes been seeing now for about a month. He of course calls me very angry because I actually had the nerve to call her and ask if she was seeing him. He then proceeded to tell me that he only told me he loved me and told me all those nice things to let me down easy? and then he said this will never work out because i'm crazy, he also tried to convence me that the girl was just a friend and that she was being spiteful. Next day they where in a Facebook relationship. Anyways i am just devastated he was my everything, i would have done anything in the world for him and i still would. He means so much to me and I don't know how to let him go. I would take him back in a minute if he would want me back. The main question on my mind is why would he tell me stuff about our future together and give me all of his password to everything if he was just trying to let me down easy I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND?????
Njeanne Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Don't question, it won't lead to anywhere. He was being a coward for breaking up with you, while cheating on you with her. Him moving away was prob a first step to the break up, he couldn't face you. The fact he facebook relationship with her next day, shows he had been cheating on you for quite some time. But trust me, I hope for his case it won't work between them because he is following his dick, men often think they are in love while it's mostly lust/infatuation. Honey, just go No Contact and heal, and if he contacts you tell him to leave you alone, because trust me he is a cheater, liar and coward, not worth your time. *gives big hug*
Lee Lo Posted February 15, 2013 Posted February 15, 2013 What you went through is devastating and im sorry. I understand how hurt you must feel and all the pain that comes with a bad break up. As bad as we all wish there was a pill we could take to stop the heartache its gotta take its own course. Grieve for what you lost, or at least feel like you lost... but dont lose sight of what youve gained-- You are wiser than you were yesterday. Take your experience, the good and the bad things, and use them to make your next relationship better. someone once told me that "Failed relationships" are really lessons you need to learn to prepare yourself for the one your going to marry/be with. Even if you dont believe that, understand that life is hard enough, you dont need the added pressure of wondering if someones being faithfull to you...consider him one less problem. Know your self worth, dont seek or accept anyone willing to treat you less than the queen you are.
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