Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Were meeting up.for the first time tonight. I like her personality and we have been talking for a week now. But now that its four hours away... I'm starting to get scared. Scared because I'm either always hurt or I'm always disappointed. My brain is racing to find excuses to bail... when all I want is a good relationship.... how can I stop psyching myself out here?
lovesickpuppy Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 (edited) How'd it go? Chill out, take a deep breath, suck it up and just live in the moment, you'll be fine, if not fake it! Don't have any expectations either!! Edited February 14, 2013 by lovesickpuppy Ooops, sorry I'm on Uk time you only just posted this!
Author Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 How'd it go? Chill out, take a deep breath, suck it up and just live in the moment, you'll be fine, if not fake it! Don't have any expectations either!! Three hours before it even happens.
TouchedByViolet Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 The best thing to do is just stay busy. Take a shower, get dressed, listen to music, watch tv, and just do whatever you enjoy that will occupy the dead time until the date. Remember to be excited and happy for your date. Life is full of possibilities, and enjoy the experience. Oh, and let us know how it goes.
Author Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 Of course I'll tell you guys Assuming I don't chicken out. The reason Im scared is because I haven't met her in person yet. Horrified that there's.might not be any physical chemistry. I need that.
normal person Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 The reason Im scared is because I haven't met her in person yet. Horrified that there's.might not be any physical chemistry. I need that. Why is that horrifying? You don't have chemistry with most people on the planet. I have no idea why you're stressing out about this at all.
coffeebean201 Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Try not to be so "instant expectations" about this. Just go and have a nice time. Try not to spend too much money and hopefully get a second date out of it. Don't get too pushy on the kissing. Especially if you are nervous. See if you can perfect your hand/shoulder, hand on her arm, gently guiding her into the restaurant skills. Try to perfect that. I love it when a man puts his hand on me just at the right time in the right place when we are in public. It feels very comforting.
Lani Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Call one of your funny friends, and have a chat. That always puts me at ease, and makes me feel good and light-hearted heading into anything. Also, have a wank. All my guy friends swear by this. We're always at our most relaxed post-sex, so it makes sense... relieve some tension..
Author Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 Not this time guys. Another dud.
Author Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 Details! Come one now. Just wasn't feeling it. She had trouble looking me in the eyes. Our conversation was lacking with me doing most of the effort even just to get her to say anything. There was not really any chemistry or common ground... or physical attraction. I played through it though, was nice and courteous, chivalrous, paid for it. Dropped her off, came back home. Just wasn't feeling it. There wasn't anything wrong with her or anything, no third boob or anything X_x Sometimes stories are not as exciting as you would like them to be. There were more sparks flying when my work crush sat next to me and we had some good conversation in the break room at lunch.
candie13 Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 It's easier to feel the sparks when you're relaxed and not overanalysing. When things just happen. Maybe you fancy your work colleague better ?
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Some people are anxious on a first date. Sometimes you get a different vibe on a second. Still if a guy wasn't completely bowled over and excited by me, I wouldn't want him asking for a second date. Good luck with the work crush!
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Just calm down and think, if it is meant to be it'll work out and happen and if not at least you tried. I freak out like this too when i have a new date or whatever and I just have to calm myself down and there are always more people out there for you if it doesn't work out.
Author Keenly Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 Just calm down and think, if it is meant to be it'll work out and happen and if not at least you tried. I freak out like this too when i have a new date or whatever and I just have to calm myself down and there are always more people out there for you if it doesn't work out. Onto other then I guess.... As for my work crush... who makes my heart melt every time she looks onto my eyes...and gives me mixed signals.... She is taken.. I don't feel it appropriate to pursue her while.she is taken because if she was ever with me, I would want her to respect our relationships fidelity.
Terminal-Ice Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Just wasn't feeling it. She had trouble looking me in the eyes. Our conversation was lacking with me doing most of the effort even just to get her to say anything. There was not really any chemistry or common ground... or physical attraction. I played through it though, was nice and courteous, chivalrous, paid for it. Dropped her off, came back home. Just wasn't feeling it. There wasn't anything wrong with her or anything, no third boob or anything X_x Sometimes stories are not as exciting as you would like them to be. There were more sparks flying when my work crush sat next to me and we had some good conversation in the break room at lunch. Alright, this is where I have to step in. If I really, really am attracted to a guy, I may have a very hard time finding things to say, and I may have a hard time looking him in the eye. It seems to me that the problem might be that there is more chemistry than you think. If this was the situation, I strongly suggest expressing your concern with her, and seeing if she wants to do something else with you. You might want to do an activity that will guide you guys like bar trivia or something. If you find her physically attractive, go ahead and give it one or two more chances. You may be your own saboteur if you don't. Not everything is perfect from the get go. Allow her to become comfortable with you. You may end up finding out that you two have great chemistry!
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