College is messing up my game

[Leigh 87]

SomeDude - I found a degree that I was just as passiosnate about, when my first choice did not work out.

 

Try to at least research a degree and subsequent career path that you can TOLLERATE.

 

Getting a degree of any sort is normally better than other career paths.

 

........What your doing is so not worth the depression and suffering your going through.

 

College is supposed to be hard work, but not constantly depressing!

 

I have periods where the work is done, I feel satisfied that I at least understand the concepts.

 

Going to sleep at night and realised you do not have a shot to even attempt a test the following morning, is not healthy.

[somedude81]

OP, I'm probably on my own with this here but I'm surprised you never switched to a course you could actually have hopes to finish. Wouldn't it be the best course forward? Salvage what you can and switch to something less strenuous rather than face challenges both in your love and professional life?

When I was chosing my major it was down to computer science or information systems. I picked IS because it required far less math.

 

As I said before, my degree is nearly complete. All my IS classes are done. All that's left are to do the general classes required for all business majors. Finance, Statistics, Calculus and Managerial Economics. I'm enrolled in three of those right now.

 

Unfortunately every single one of those classes has something to do with math.

That could be quite right. I've had only one lecture that really got me interested and that was a substitute teacher.

 

Furthermore I think the only way you're going to complete Calculus is practice, practice, practice, practice and when you feel like rather swallowing the book practice some more.

The lecture is absolutely horrible and a waste of my time. Room full of 100+ students. Professor plugs in his iPad into a projector and draws on PDF's. Students are expected to fallow along. Thankfully in the SI class we do actual problems but even that is too fast for me.

 

A really big issue is that I don't know how to study for math and when I look at my notes at home, they make zero sense to me.

[SmileFace]

Practice.

That is how you learn math.

You need to practice the formulas.

That is the only way.

Get several text books and follow along with the topic and practice different way to do the problems until you find the way for you.

[JuneJulySeptember]

When I was chosing my major it was down to computer science or information systems. I picked IS because it required far less math.

 

As I said before, my degree is nearly complete. All my IS classes are done. All that's left are to do the general classes required for all business majors. Finance, Statistics, Calculus and Managerial Economics. I'm enrolled in three of those right now.

 

Unfortunately every single one of those classes has something to do with math.

 

The lecture is absolutely horrible and a waste of my time. Room full of 100+ students. Professor plugs in his iPad into a projector and draws on PDF's. Students are expected to fallow along. Thankfully in the SI class we do actual problems but even that is too fast for me.

 

A really big issue is that I don't know how to study for math and when I look at my notes at home, they make zero sense to me.

 

What are you on?

 

Differentials? Calc I?

 

Differentials are easy. It's just the rate of change of a quantity over time as time approaches zero. It's not until integrals of odd shapes and multiple variables differentials that things start to get complicated.

 

Calculus I is a difficult course because it is used as 1) a pre med students course and 2) a weed out course for engineers (though Calc II is the true weed out course).

 

So, you ideally should be putting in 15 hours a week. That should get you to pass the course.

 

You may have dyscalcula, in which case though, you wouldn't have been able to get through algebra. I think you are just not putting in enough time, but obviously, I don't know you.

[ThaWholigan]

Practice.

That is how you learn math.

You need to practice the formulas.

That is the only way.

Get several text books and follow along with the topic and practice different way to do the problems until you find the way for you.

Agreed. I have recently downloaded GIGABYTES of maths books and videos (more still to finish). I'm not even studying anymore but information is information and I'm passionate about that and about learning.

 

If you need the info, I can provide the links.

[SmileFace]

What are you on?

 

Differentials? Calc I?

 

Differentials are easy. It's just the rate of change of a quantity over time as time approaches zero. It's not until integrals of odd shapes and multiple variables differentials that things start to get complicated.

 

Calculus I is a difficult course because it is used as 1) a pre med students course and 2) a weed out course for engineers (though Calc II is the true weed out course).

 

So, you ideally should be putting in 15 hours a week. That should get you to pass the course.

 

You may have dyscalcula, in which case though, you wouldn't have been able to get through algebra. I think you are just not putting in enough time, but obviously, I don't know you.

 

@bolded.

Wow, you learn new stuff daily.

However I highly doubt it - he is CIS major if I am not mistaking. He wouldn't have got this far into this degree with it.

[somedude81]

Somedude,

 

I get a sense that you are quite depressed and snapping back/being angry at people is a defense mechanism, rather than you just being a dick. You are at the point of where you seem so frustrated with life that you lost motivation to do anything.

Snapping back?

 

Mes is always on my case so I wasn't going to give her a real answer. Then the question itself was unworthy of a response. "What do you have to offer to a woman?" That's nothing more than a baiting question and only a sucker would actually try to answer. If almost any other female member asked me that question I would have just ignored it. But a few members would get a dickish response.

 

Though I'm not saying that you are wrong about me being depressed and snapping back at people, it is something I have done a few times on this forum.

 

And yes, I've lost almost all motivation. I'm basically getting shut down in everything I'm trying to do. I feel like I'm not allowed to be successful.

I know that you think getting a girlfriend will make everything so much better, but unfortunately it's not something you have 100% control of. You probably see passing calculus and getting a college degree as much less important, but I bet it adds to your misery and a sense failure. I bet that failing calculus test is going to knock your overall self-esteem and confidence even further. It will reflect in all areas of your life, including getting girls.

That is exactly why I made this thread. Doing poorly in school is knocking down my self-esteem and that makes it even harder to attract women.

 

Trying to get a GF and pass all my classes both seem like impossible things that I must accomplish.

 

Trust me, you will so much better about yourself if you can somehow find a motivation to finish your college degree. From your posts on here, I know that you are more than intelligent enough. If you hate calculus and have tried all reasonable avenues (with getting tutors etc) and failed, is there a way you can transfer your credits and graduate with something that doesn't require calculus?

 

This is something that you DO have 100% control of and it's about time you did something about it.

There are no other degrees that I could switch to. Either way I'm basically 95% done.

 

It's not about motivation, it's about being able to somehow learn whats in front of me.

[sweetjasmine]

I blame the teaching. Most teachers/books make calculus seem more complicated than it is. Students quickly lose track and get intimidated and it snowballs from there.

 

Absolutely this. In high school, the teacher was so awful it made class feel like the Bataan death march. I'm redoing the class now as part of a career change, and the instructor is so wonderful that it really is a world of difference. I barely remember what I learned the first time around, but it doesn't matter because this particular professor has a knack for presenting things clearly. Instead of just copying sh-t out of a textbook and writing it on the board.

 

I think this is why it really helps to reach out, attend office hours, go to tutoring centers, etc. to try to find someone who can explain things in a way that you, personally!, get them. It takes effort to do that sometimes, but if what's said in class sounds like gibberish, it's the only way.

[fortyninethousand322]

The idea that you have to accomplish X before you can get a girlfriend is kind of baffling. There's always something in life to work towards, some thing you have to do. Whether it's school, a new job, buying a house, etc. If everyone put off dating period while they did these things nobody would ever date. I know people in law school who are married, people with very busy, very stressful lives who nevertheless get plenty of dates.

 

It's a bogus idea that people say just to make you feel better about not being able to get a girlfriend.

[somedude81]

What are you on?

 

Differentials? Calc I?

 

Differentials are easy. It's just the rate of change of a quantity over time as time approaches zero. It's not until integrals of odd shapes and multiple variables differentials that things start to get complicated.

 

Calculus I is a difficult course because it is used as 1) a pre med students course and 2) a weed out course for engineers (though Calc II is the true weed out course).

 

So, you ideally should be putting in 15 hours a week. That should get you to pass the course.

 

You may have dyscalcula, in which case though, you wouldn't have been able to get through algebra. I think you are just not putting in enough time, but obviously, I don't know you.

Calculus for business

 

Functions, derivatives, optimization problems, graphs, partial derivatives. Lagrange multipliers, intergration of functions of one variable. Applications to business and economics. Emphasis on problem-solving techniques

______________

It took me roughly three years of Jr. college to get through algebra.

 

I've also tried to take algebra again in college to get the background for Cal, but I kept dropping the class. I've lost track of how many math classes I've dropped.

@bolded.

Wow, you learn new stuff daily.

However I highly doubt it - he is CIS major if I am not mistaking. He wouldn't have got this far into this degree with it.

Actually, if you didn't notice, I've left all my math related classes for last. Procrastination at its finest

[SmileFace]

The idea that you have to accomplish X before you can get a girlfriend is kind of baffling. There's always something in life to work towards, some thing you have to do. Whether it's school, a new job, buying a house, etc. If everyone put off dating period while they did these things nobody would ever date. I know people in law school who are married, people with very busy, very stressful lives who nevertheless get plenty of dates.

 

It's a bogus idea that people say just to make you feel better about not being able to get a girlfriend.

What thread are you reading?

[clia]

I've tried stuff like that before and still ended up failing and having to repeat a class.

 

You always have an excuse, don't you?

 

It's not about begging them to pass me. I need to somehow learn the material or I'm just going to fail the next test.

 

I'm not saying you beg your professor to pass you. I'm telling you that you gain no brownie points at all by not even turning in a test. Your professor won't even know you showed up for it! You are going to have to put the work in. After failing the first test completely -- 0 points -- you have a lot of ground to make up. But, if you can show your professor and T.A. that you were trying very hard and were doing everything you could (including tutors, study groups, office hours, etc.), then even if you still don't get it, when he has to make a decision between an F and a D, he might just give you the D because you were working your butt off. (And he'll know who you are rather than a faceless person with a 0 on the first test in a mass of 100 students.) That said, you have to actually work your butt off in order to pass the class.

 

I just can't believe you couldn't answer one question on your test yesterday. How many times have you gone to office hours and asked for help since the semester began? How many hours a week -- outside of class -- are you putting in studying for this class? Calculus is a tough class, and the further behind you get, the worse off you are going to be. You need to get control of this right now.

 

Again, I think you should go to talk to your professor the next time he has office hours open, explain your predicament, tell him your plan to try to pass the class -- including getting help from him, your T.A., your tutor, and a study group -- and then see if he has any other suggestions. Unless he is a complete ass, he is going to want to help you out.

[SmileFace]

Calculus for business

 

Functions, derivatives, optimization problems, graphs, partial derivatives. Lagrange multipliers, intergration of functions of one variable. Applications to business and economics. Emphasis on problem-solving techniques

______________

It took me roughly three years of Jr. college to get through algebra.

 

I've also tried to take algebra again in college to get the background for Cal, but I kept dropping the class. I've lost track of how many math classes I've dropped.

 

Actually, if you didn't notice, I've left all my math related classes for last. Procrastination at its finest

That wasn't a great idea but I understand. You are CIS right? I can't even say go to CS since CIS is the easier of the two. What other degrees are offered?

[fortyninethousand322]

What thread are you reading?

 

This one. Much of the advice is "stay away from girls until you finish school".

[kaylan]

The ship might have sailed on pretty much all women. At 32 he's got a lot of catching up to do.

At his age his best target range is 27 to 33. Women younger than that tend to want a young guy their age they relate to and women older than that are super serious about settling down very soon. Him going after college and grad school aged girls 18 to 26, isnt that feasible anymore. Unless hes an exceptional guy they wont notice him.

 

Somedude you gotta network. The reason I met the last girl I dated was because she knew friends at my old house in college. So we met when I did a visit. And another girl Im currently talking to knew a mutual college friend of mine. Make friends and network.

 

And dont sleep on OLD either. For as much reaching out that you have to do and what not, Im talking toa reallllly cool girl right now. But in all seriousness...focus on school for now.

[sweetjasmine]

The idea that you have to accomplish X before you can get a girlfriend is kind of baffling.

 

I thought the issue here was that SD needs to accomplish something (ie, pass the class) in order to graduate on time.

 

All this talk of girlfriends is a total distraction. Or do you guys think that if he got a girlfriend tomorrow, he'd suddenly understand calculus and pass with flying colors?

[SmileFace]

This one. Much of the advice is "stay away from girls until you finish school".

No that isn't universal advice however this is why we have so much ****ty relationships in this world. Anyway if he was able to do both he would be doing and not asking so I think the advice in this thread is spot on. It isn't saying not to date but do not put your focus there - which should the way it always is. Plus he has a huge hurdle he needs to get over - truthfully he doesn't need the distraction.

[ThaWholigan]

I thought the issue here was that SD needs to accomplish something (ie, pass the class) in order to graduate on time.

 

All this talk of girlfriends is a total distraction. Or do you guys think that if he got a girlfriend tomorrow, he'd suddenly understand calculus and pass with flying colors?

To me, this stems from the fact that Somedude basically has no purpose except "I want a GF" and he has no motivation to even switch from that.

 

When I go home either later or tomorrow, I will absolutely send him some links even if he doesn't want me to. He clearly needs the help, nobody will do it in real life and he's not going to do it for himself. He has to pass this, and once he does, he needs to really find something else to put his energy towards.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Calculus for business

 

Functions, derivatives, optimization problems, graphs, partial derivatives. Lagrange multipliers, intergration of functions of one variable. Applications to business and economics. Emphasis on problem-solving techniques

______________

It took me roughly three years of Jr. college to get through algebra.

 

I've also tried to take algebra again in college to get the background for Cal, but I kept dropping the class. I've lost track of how many math classes I've dropped.

 

I see.

 

Well, that's actually a watered down version of the Calc that Engineers and science majors have to take.

 

Perhaps you do have a disability, in which case, I'm not sure what to say.

 

I could get an A in your class with maybe 5-7 hours of study a week. That wasn't to brag, but maybe just to show how it's just way harder for some people. Just like dating, I guess. People are different. Posters here may have no idea how hard you are working to pass Calc, just as they have no idea how hard you are working to find a woman.

 

Well, stick with it man.

[fortyninethousand322]

I thought the issue here was that SD needs to accomplish something (ie, pass the class) in order to graduate on time.

 

All this talk of girlfriends is a total distraction. Or do you guys think that if he got a girlfriend tomorrow, he'd suddenly understand calculus and pass with flying colors?

 

No. But I think he'd be less depressed. And, at 32 the clock is ticking. He's almost completely inexperience (at the very least with relationships). Putting dating off isn't necessarily a great idea.

[Treasa]

No. But I think he'd be less depressed. And, at 32 the clock is ticking. He's almost completely inexperience (at the very least with relationships). Putting dating off isn't necessarily a great idea.

 

What clock? I'm 38 and not married and have never had kids. I haven't exploded yet.

[fortyninethousand322]

At his age his best target range is 27 to 33. Women younger than that tend to want a young guy their age they relate to and women older than that are super serious about settling down very soon. Him going after college and grad school aged girls 18 to 26, isnt that feasible anymore. Unless hes an exceptional guy they wont notice him.

 

That's true, but I don't think most 27-33 years olds will be interested either. Most women that age want a guy who's been "broken in" as it were.

[Treasa]

Some of you are going to be REALLY disappointed when you realize that getting married isn't like winning something amazing that will guarantee happiness or self-esteem.

 

Why not enjoy life as you live it, and enjoy the moment you're in right now? I know that's a crazy concept, but...

[sweetjasmine]

No. But I think he'd be less depressed. And, at 32 the clock is ticking. He's almost completely inexperience (at the very least with relationships). Putting dating off isn't necessarily a great idea.

 

When you're about to flush all of your college work down the drain because you're struggling with one class, YES, it is a great idea to put off everything else. Including dating.

 

Seriously, this is like having your arm chopped off and asking the doctor what they can do about your migraines instead.

[clia]

At his age his best target range is 27 to 33. Women younger than that tend to want a young guy their age they relate to and women older than that are super serious about settling down very soon. Him going after college and grad school aged girls 18 to 26, isnt that feasible anymore. Unless hes an exceptional guy they wont notice him.

 

I also completely agree with this. When I was in undergrad (18-22), I thought guys who were 30 and older were absolutely ancient. There's no way I would've dated or taken any serious interest in a guy "that old." In fact, when guys "that old" hit on me, I found it a little creepy and wondered why they weren't going after women closer to their own age. (It's kind of humorous now, looking back on it, that I thought 30 was so old...) Of course not all college age girls feel the same way I did, but my bet is that it wouldn't be a rare perspective.