cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 It's a website that apparently is used to find sugar daddy's. She is using pictures I took of her while we were dressed up in our halloween costumes. I want to freaking rip her head off. I want to scream and freaking hurt her! I know....no contact, don't seek her out....freaking whore! OMG. I'm sorry, I am angry and this is not good!
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 I'm going to text her. I'm going to go off then tomorrow, I'm shutting off the phone I'm paying for. It was only staying up till Friday anyway but this is the last straw. Taking something her and did for fun on halloween and using it to get guys.....unbelievable. SOmeone tell me what to do....because I"m about to lose it!
denxnis Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 I have a rule of thumb, think it over for 24 hours and then do it. Decisions you make in moments like this are often regretted. 2
mammasita Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 I was in a similar position with the cell phone. I didn't hesitate to cut it off though. He chooses not to be with me, he doesn't have the benefit of being on my plan. I'm sorry you found her on that site, but you shouldn't have gone looking.
2sure Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Cut her phone off of course. But if you aren't IN the picture...it's of her and you can be hurt but you can't do anything about it. She wants a sugar daddy. Good riddance.
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 (edited) yeah apparently. establishedmen So this is what I did. I pulled up my phone carrier website. Found the page with the suspend service on it. Then I wrote a text to her and it said this : I'm disconnecting your phone. I'm quite sure that a sugar daddy from establishedmen will replace it based on our halloween pictures I took. Too bad I couldn't have paid for another 8 months of sex. LM****ingao!!!! She responded with : WTF I told you I was getting another line this week. I pushed the suspend service button on the computer right after I sent this : Autoreply: this number has blocked your text. I want her to get cancer! Edited February 13, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
cavalier99 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 (edited) yeah apparently. establishedmen So this is what I did. I pulled up my phone carrier website. Found the page with the suspend service on it. Then I wrote a text to her and it said this : I'm disconnecting your phone. I'm quite sure that a sugar daddy from establishedmen will replace it based on our halloween pictures I took. Too bad I couldn't have paid for another 8 months of sex. LM****ingao!!!! She responded with : WTF I told you I was getting another line this week. I pushed the suspend service button on the computer right after I sent this : Autoreply: this number has blocked your text. I want her to get cancer! Ha good for you! Well this is technically not NC. But I did similar sh*t the week after my BU. I dropped the nuclear bomb of texts etcetera basically ensuring she would be super hesitant to ever contact me. Don't regret it at all. It think leaving on good terms is over rated. F*ck them. I really laid into my ex and forcibly changes all her password. Best thing i ever did post bu. We can be friendly again in a year or so. Lol i still got nice text in December inspite of all of that. Edited February 13, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 You know Cav, I'm a little drunk right now, but I've been cheated on and now used. I don't know which is worse. The sick part of it all is that if I was called a whore like that, I would not have responded with what she said. I would have defended my honor. That right there says MOUNTAINS! I was played by a professional. I was duped into believing I was special. I'm not special. I'm a dime a dozen. I know, tomorrow, when I wake up and face my day, I'm going to be angry as hell. I realize I should not have looked but I wanted her to know that I think she is a whore. I wanted her to know that she used me. I just want to be done with it all. I want to just be happy, in love, with a family and done with all this dating BS. For the love of all that's holy, why am I being put through this?
fancy feast Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 "I'm looking for: Perfect Princesses" What in the actual **** is this. Lol Internet, you never cease to surprise me. Literally just got a message saying my tax return was accepted. Is this a sign???
Jono85 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 reminds me of when i spent the weekend with my ex a few weeks after we broke up to see if anything was still there, and i found on her phone she'd sent a sexy photo she'd taken for me to some other dude lol. immediately made her take the plan B we had bought for after our weekend, and left that bitch in tears. stupid hoe.
GingerVixen Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 One question: Do you want to text a girl who posts sexy Halloween pictures in WEBSITES TO FIND SUGAR DADDIES? Are you still sad because you lost her? That's all I have to say.
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 Fancy, yeah, I would have never known but for a little snooping on her phone I did about 4 months ago. Thought it was one of those spam messages on her phone at the time....well hoop teee dooo...what do you know. See, the one thing I'm good at in life is that I know this. People, no matter who they are or what they do, or what education level they have, are people of reason. There is no action that is not already thought out in advance. Whether it be someone cheating or lying or stealing or robbing. People always have reasons for how they behave. It's true in relationships as well. The question is, do we want to find out what those reasons are. Now, a lot of people on LS don't think the reasons someone hurt us are important. I disagree. I think the more you know, the more you are able to put the puzzle of the past together and figure out what actually happened and couple that with why it happened. See in our world today, those are two completely different and distinct things. People may tell you one thing but their actions tell you another. If you are smart enough and capable enough and wanting enough, you can find all the answers you need without ever confronting the person you are investigating. Then when you have enough evidence to prosecute, you throw down the hammer on the poor unsuspecting prey. Leaving them only one option. To confess. You find all the proof you need to convict and then you do it. When you do it, the only remorse is that you you wasted however much time with that person thinking about some alternate reality that you HOPED was real. Some day, I HOPE to find a real reality that has a happy ending.
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 One question: Do you want to text a girl who posts sexy Halloween pictures in WEBSITES TO FIND SUGAR DADDIES? Are you still sad because you lost her? That's all I have to say. No. I'm mad that I wasted 8 months thinking I was special!
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 I don't feel better at all. It is not about feeling better quite yet. I chug off her phone and let her know she is a using and deceitful person. I do t care what she thinks or who has what power. The relationship is over and I'm completely free of her. I'm angry I was duped for 8 months but you live and learn and the lesson I learned is that people may only change for a little while and eventually go back to their the nature.
flitzanu Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 It's a website that apparently is used to find sugar daddy's. She is using pictures I took of her while we were dressed up in our halloween costumes. I want to freaking rip her head off. I want to scream and freaking hurt her! I know....no contact, don't seek her out....freaking whore! OMG. I'm sorry, I am angry and this is not good! why exactly were you browsing the website?
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 Because I wanted to be in complete violation of the NO CONTACT guide! 1
Mack05 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 I know you are angry dude but wishing cancer on someone makes you a far bigger a@@hole. No one should wish that kind of terrible illness on any person. No matter how angry they are. By behaving like this you are letting her keep her grip over here. It doesn't matter what she does or how many sugar daddies she ends up with. You need to let that stuff go. Obsessing about it won't help you. You are consumed with bitterness and unless you deal with this in the right way, this will effect future relationships. Immature, bitter people can't forgive. They don't end up living good lives. Don't be like that. Choose a wiser more fulfilling path. Forgive her, gain acceptance and then move towards getting a woman who will always think you are special. Not only that but try to understand you don't need a woman to make you feel special. This is something you should feel within. You don't require a woman's validation on being special.. 5
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 I know you are angry dude but wishing cancer on someone makes you a far bigger a@@hole. No one should wish that kind of terrible illness on any person. No matter how angry they are. By behaving like this you are letting her keep her grip over here. It doesn't matter what she does or how many sugar daddies she ends up with. You need to let that stuff go. Obsessing about it won't help you. You are consumed with bitterness and unless you deal with this in the right way, this will effect future relationships. Immature, bitter people can't forgive. They don't end up living good lives. Don't be like that. Choose a wiser more fulfilling path. Forgive her, gain acceptance and then move towards getting a woman who will always think you are special. Not only that but try to understand you don't need a woman to make you feel special. This is something you should feel within. You don't require a woman's validation on being special.. Mack: You are right. I know in my heart you are right. But how do you forgive people who hurt you who don't even ask to be forgiven? I am bitter and I am angry and it's not just because of this girl. There are far bigger issues I have that cause that. The question is, how do I fix it? There is no tool to clear out the anger, frustration, resentment, that is now back after I thought I cleared it out. Religion helps me. But I am weak and only time will right the ship that is now wrecked inside again. It took me 3 years to get back to being me. Anger was replaced by love. I had HOPE. I realize no woman can make me happy. But I know feeling loved and wanted does make me HAPPIER! Actually it would be nice to have that feeling for once in my life and not have this seed in the back of my mind that it's not sincere. A 10 year marriage that was lifeless. Being cheated on. Now being used. Can I change someone to better themselves? No. I can change me. And it's going to be a long, hard road again.
TaraMaiden Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Mack: You are right. I know in my heart you are right. But how do you forgive people who hurt you who don't even ask to be forgiven? I am bitter and I am angry and it's not just because of this girl. There are far bigger issues I have that cause that. The question is, how do I fix it? There is no tool to clear out the anger, frustration, resentment, that is now back after I thought I cleared it out. Religion helps me. But I am weak and only time will right the ship that is now wrecked inside again. It took me 3 years to get back to being me. Anger was replaced by love. I had HOPE. I realize no woman can make me happy. But I know feeling loved and wanted does make me HAPPIER! Actually it would be nice to have that feeling for once in my life and not have this seed in the back of my mind that it's not sincere. A 10 year marriage that was lifeless. Being cheated on. Now being used. Can I change someone to better themselves? No. I can change me. And it's going to be a long, hard road again. Post #2, post #10. You don't forgive others to let them off the hook. You forgive others to let YOU off the hook. 1
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 I know you are angry dude but wishing cancer on someone makes you a far bigger a@@hole. No one should wish that kind of terrible illness on any person. No matter how angry they are. By behaving like this you are letting her keep her grip over here. It doesn't matter what she does or how many sugar daddies she ends up with. You need to let that stuff go. Obsessing about it won't help you. You are consumed with bitterness and unless you deal with this in the right way, this will effect future relationships. Immature, bitter people can't forgive. They don't end up living good lives. Don't be like that. Choose a wiser more fulfilling path. Forgive her, gain acceptance and then move towards getting a woman who will always think you are special. Not only that but try to understand you don't need a woman to make you feel special. This is something you should feel within. You don't require a woman's validation on being special.. Couldn't have said it any better! OP, why do the photos matter so much? I've actually suggested to exes that they use some of the pictures I've taken of them on their dating profile. That's because I'm no longer emotionally invested in having a romantic connection to them. You are upset because you spent eight months on someone and discovered you were not special to her, while she meant a great deal to you. All your rages and outbursts do is emphasize that fact...to you. Is she wound up and stymied by the breakup? No! She's hunting a sugar daddy. The relationship doesn't matter to her. She is proceeding with her life. You refuse to proceed with yours and instead are stuck still trying to get her to care and show some emotion, any emotion, for you through your tactics. You continue to seek validation from her that you mattered. Why give someone who doesn't care about you such power? All you are doing is hurting yourself. Your rage and bad behavior is a cancer holding YOU back from getting on with your life. You are drinking poison and hoping it will kill her. Doesn't work that way. Her life continues. She's focused elsewhere. You are left obsessing about her, her choices, and her every move. Your life will be stuck until you let go. Stalking her every move online is destructive to you, not her. Your meltdowns and angry outbursts ultimately make YOU feel worse after the initial high. Each encounter is a reminder that she doesn't care while you've invested eight months and counting. Please go no contact. You'll do yourself a huge favor and heal more quickly.
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Mack: You are right. I know in my heart you are right. But how do you forgive people who hurt you who don't even ask to be forgiven? I am bitter and I am angry and it's not just because of this girl. There are far bigger issues I have that cause that. The question is, how do I fix it? There is no tool to clear out the anger, frustration, resentment, that is now back after I thought I cleared it out. Religion helps me. But I am weak and only time will right the ship that is now wrecked inside again. It took me 3 years to get back to being me. Anger was replaced by love. I had HOPE. I realize no woman can make me happy. But I know feeling loved and wanted does make me HAPPIER! Actually it would be nice to have that feeling for once in my life and not have this seed in the back of my mind that it's not sincere. A 10 year marriage that was lifeless. Being cheated on. Now being used. Can I change someone to better themselves? No. I can change me. And it's going to be a long, hard road again. Learn to forgive yourself when you make a mistake. Hauling unresolved baggage around when you date will result in you continuing to make poor choices and ignore red flags that probably popped up along the way. Bitterness, anger, and mistrust attract partners who are suboptimal for a healthy relationship. Stop and take time to work on you first if you want to get anywhere. Or, waste another precious eight months, three years, ten years, whatever, repeating a dysfunctional pattern that leaves you feeling this angry each time. Your choice. 1
Author cdt76 Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 I was being the nice guy and paying for her phone until I gave her to this week to get new service. The pictures hurt because I took them of us. It was a very memorable night for the two of us. I've deleted all pictures of her. I've deleted all contacts in social media. As of last night I cut off the phone. I will not be contacting her again. I will not be looking for her online or anywhere else. I am officially done. The rage and anger is holding me back. It has for some time. Tara, first gave me advice back in 2009. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things I've ever tried to do. Can I forgive the people who hurt me in 2009? Maybe, I've not really thought about doing that. But it's so distant that it's possible I can. I don't think I'm able to forgive this girl at the moment. It's too raw. Possibly in the future because I always wanted to see the best in her. Now all I see is the worst. Please don't think I am dismissing your advice. I would not be here if I didn't need it from you all. The hate held me back for a long time and I finally let it go some time around 2011. I won't be holding onto this very long. Going through the ordeal in 2009 made me stronger, built higher walls and I have learned a lot about me as a person. I'm just going to take some time and not think about her or the past year. The anger will go away soon and I might try forgiving everyone.
Chi townD Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Because I wanted to be in complete violation of the NO CONTACT guide! LMAO!!! I literally spit my coffee out on this!! Dude, I think you have a right to be mad. I know I would but don't do anything stupid like contact her. All it makes you look like is a creepy stalker in her eyes. And I think your bigger than that. However! if you want to come here and vent. Vent away! Get it out!
cavalier99 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Yo Cdt76. I just spent some time reading your old threads. Your not going to go back into that pit again. Ok? I'm all for the text you sent. So what... it was spiteful and angry..big deal. I did similar stuff post BU. Do you know why? Because i was flaming pissed and let it out before going NC. No regrets. BUT the ill will that I wish on my ex that i posted here i sorta say in jest when I'm angry. Deep down i forgive her and wish her the best and me too. She is just another flawed human being like all of us. I'm still struggling but i try to let go of the anger and hurt. It just drags me down and gives power to something that is now non existent in my life. Is this tough. F*k yeah. I feel like I've been beaten with a sledge hammer after the end my 8 year RS. I'm a lot better than a couple months ago.... but some days i wonder if i even progressed at all and think that this will never end and i wonder if there are deeper issues at work that are holding me back. Anyway, keep on going and practice the meditation stuff tara recommends. I forget to do this and pay the price when i do. Cav
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