ohnoo Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 (edited) My LDR boyfriend of less than a month called me, he woke me up just to ask for a vagina video. He told me he had a dream of me and him having sex so now he is so hard. Then he gave me 2 options. First is I send him a video or second, he's gonna go out and look for p*ssy. After the call, I texted him to watch what he's saying and he told me he's sorry and it was just a joke and why I'm mad "what's the ****ing problem?" because obviously for him I don't know what's a joke from not and told me I'm crazy and see a doctor. I told him that I felt like a toy and asked him what if I did the same thing to him (wake him up and ask for a penis video) what will he do? He told me that he will not get mad and then told me that if I felt like a toy that's because I have low self-esteem so I don't trust people so I shouldn't blame him for feeling this way. He's 34 and I'm 28, he always tells me that I think too much. Did I overthink on this one? And yeah, we do send each other those kind of videos but I don't like it when he demands it out of the blue. Edited February 12, 2013 by ohnoo
TaraMaiden Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 How far away is your BF...? Okay, forget it, it doesn't matter. Nowhere would be far enough. Tell him to go get pussy if he likes, you're not bothered. He doesn't have a GF, he's single, he can do what he likes - then cut him off and go No Contact. Sorted. He's 34? Are you sure? I mean, really?? He's acting like a hormonal spotty little teenager. Jeesh, tell him to go phukk himself. 4
clia Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 My LDR boyfriend of less than a month called me, he woke me up just to ask for a vagina video. Gross. He woke you up? You've known him less than a month and are sending him videos of your vagina? Have you met him in person yet? Please make sure your face isn't in the videos. And no, you aren't overreacting. He sounds like a pig. 2
CarrieT Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 Total douche and, no, you are not wrong. The problem now is that he has a bunch of videos of you and - if you don't see the potential of a spouse in a jerk like this - there is a chance your vids are going to show up on a site like YouPorn-dot-com. Reasons to never send videos until you are in a solid, committed relationship (or never). Sorry, girlfriend, I think you are in trouble... 2
TaraMaiden Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Carrie, I agree, but 2 can play at that game... it seems she may have videos of him too....? 2
bethbarrett2009 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 This guy is a jerk. Drop him as of yesterday. 1
Author ohnoo Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 Thanks all! I also posted this question on another site and I got a completely different response. It was me overreacting. Hmm, I think there's truth here and there. Partly my fault because I already gave him something that he wanted before so he expected that I'll give again and that I'll be ok with it. According to a guy's opinion, he was just being spontaneous and he probably got hurt and upset by me saying that I felt like a toy. (My bf did text me that he never thought of me that way hence the "no self-esteem" comment from him.) Someone also said that I should be glad that as soon as he woke up he called me for a video of me and not went looking for a random vagina in a porn site. Bf told me yesterday that he will "never ever do that again"...but now we are not talking which is fine as I also don't wanna talk to him. To be honest, I think he may have felt embarrassed by me saying "Don't wake me up for a vagina video again.". Videos being uploaded is the least of my problem. He even deletes my videos for fear of leaking but he knows I don't delete his', he's fine with it and told me he trusts me. He has a kinda sensitive job and he has a reputation so if the vids got uploaded he'll be in lot of trouble not me.
CC12 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 Partly my fault because I already gave him something that he wanted before so he expected that I'll give again and that I'll be ok with it. No. You're not at fault that someone made an inappropriate request. It's not even really about "fault." He was pushy and gross about it. And when you called him out on it and tried to create a very reasonable boundary (Please don't wake me up and demand dirty videos from me) he pretty much said, "GOD, it was a joke. What's your ****ing problem? You need to see a doctor. It's not my fault you have such low self esteem." He totally disregarded your feelings while also assigning blame to you for something that HE did! How did you meet this guy? Just curious.
Author ohnoo Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 (edited) No. You're not at fault that someone made an inappropriate request. It's not even really about "fault." He was pushy and gross about it. And when you called him out on it and tried to create a very reasonable boundary (Please don't wake me up and demand dirty videos from me) he pretty much said, "GOD, it was a joke. What's your ****ing problem? You need to see a doctor. It's not my fault you have such low self esteem." He totally disregarded your feelings while also assigning blame to you for something that HE did! How did you meet this guy? Just curious. He's my boss. He's a movie producer and I'm his personal designer. He's an extremely busy man to the point that if he can't visit me he'll send me tickets to see him. He's in Korea now, I'm in a different Asian country. No, that wasn't a joke. He really wanted the video to jack off. And frankly, I felt that it was a 'need' for him at that moment. So funny I know but he sounded like he really needed it. It must have been a very nice dream. Basically the conversation went like this after the call: Me: You better watch what you're saying. Option 1 & 2? Are you kidding me?! Him: I'm sorry, it was a joke. I need your video. :'( Me: Ok, you do option 2. Enjoy. Him: Crazy! I was just kidding! Me: You make me feel so cheap! Him: You think too much, you keep thinking negative. What is the ****ing problem? Me: You treat me like a toy, that's the ****ing problem. Him: You don't have enough self-esteem so you keep thinking negative and don't trust people. You think it by yourself, don't blame others. I never thought of you like that. Me: Why are you talking about my self-esteem? You made me feel like that! Ok what will you do if I woke you up to demand a penis video? Will you do it? Will you get mad? Him: I will not get mad. Why will I get mad? Me: Because you are sleeping and I woke you up just to ask for a penis video! Him: Now I understand you. I will never ever do that again. Me: Yeah, don't wake me up for a vagina video again. Him: Ok. Me: So now what? You will do option 2? Him: Crazy. You better see a doctor. Me: I can't read you. You told me not to joke like that but you are the one doing it. Him: I don't wanna talk to you now. See you. Me: Stupid. No contact 'til now. Oh! And my work contract with him is 1 year but technically the project we're doing will take 3 years. So we will be with each other for a while... Edited February 13, 2013 by ohnoo
outsidethebox Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 What the hell is a vagina video and why would anybody want to look at it?
Author ohnoo Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 ^ It's a girlfriend's porn exclusively for the boyfriend. Lol!
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