BF told me that he has bipolar. how can i reconize his mood paterns/ b there 4 him

[shontelevision]

hello. my boyfriend has told me yesterday that he has a sevear cause of bipolar. i am not fimilar with the term, i know what it is, but what can i do to help him, and to reconize his mood paterns and what i should so when he is down.[font=arial][/font][color=green][/color]

[The_Analyzer]

Do a search on bipolar disorder and it may give you some things to look for, as well as explain how you can be supportive with someone that has it. Good luck.

[YellowLioness]

Being bi-polar is different for everyone.

 

My friend Tanya tends to appear really happy when she's manic. Then, she gets really angry when she's depressed.

 

I tend to want to have sex all the time when I'm manic. I also tend to clean more, and also be a bit more aggressive then normal. When I'm depressed, I get snippy and just want to be left alone. Little things seem big to me.

 

Then, my aunt is pretty severe and is on lithium. She is manic for years at a time, and depressed for the same. When she is manic, she thinks that Jesus has healed her. However, she is a pretty rough case. Most people aren't this bad off.

 

Its different for everyone.

 

I'm lucky, my boyfriend loves me alot and is very understanding. He knows when I am not being "myself."

 

 

p.s. FMPE, there is no way to tell when a mood swing is coming on. PMS makes them worse.

[loveregardless]

lioness is right, everyone is different. You should definetely do as much research as possible on the subject, along with research on other disorders like ADD and OCD because very often bipolar patients suffer from many disorders in one. I am bipolar (particularly ADD and OCD prone) and I choose not to be on medication, and if anything... just smoke when I get too uptight. (As long as we're being completely honest here) Most days I'm fine, some days I'm not. When I was younger I had a lot harder time dealing with it than I do now. Most people who have any knowlege of their own disorder can recognize certain patterns in themselves that will help them, and their family/partners to deal with the mood swings effectively. Most therapists will require bipolar patients to keep a diary of his/her moods every day. After a while, you will see certain patterns emerging. It's like a roller coaster ride of emotions, quite literally, and if you aren't prepared it can be overwhelming for everyone involved. Mostly you just have to remember that no matter what, abuse and mistreatment are never ok. From either direction. No matter what disease he may have it is never ok for him to abuse or mistreat you. I only say that because if he is bipolar, then being that you will be the person closest to him (emotionally) you are the person who he will show his emotions to. Bipolar people only act "crazy" around people that they are very comfortable with, but unfortunately they often TAKE IT OUT on those that they are comfortable with. But the no abuse and mistreatment rule goes for you, too. Don't take his honesty about his disease for granted, and don't use it against him. Don't think that because he is bipolar that you can attribute all of his emotions to that at all times. Sometimes bipolar people get mad/upset/happy about things and it's not necessarily because they are being manic or depressive or anything bipolar related at all. That has always been my biggest issue, is not being taken seriously when I am being resonable, because people automatically assume that bipolar people are always unreasonable. That being said, bipolar people are some of the funniest, most brilliant, creative, sensitive, and loving people on earth. It's just a very different world for them, an every day struggle that those who do not suffer from the disorder could not possibly understand. It's like living a life in your head that noone can see and another in the world that we let you see. I don't mean like schizophrenia or anything. but just the constant perseverance of thought. Manic thought. Depressive thought. But always...thought!

[YellowLioness]

I choose not to be on medication, and if anything... just smoke when I get too uptight

 

Me too! I can't afford my meds (Lamictal) so I have to self medicate.

 

only say that because if he is bipolar, then being that you will be the person closest to him (emotionally) you are the person who he will show his emotions to. Bipolar people only act "crazy" around people that they are very comfortable with, but unfortunately they often TAKE IT OUT on those that they are comfortable with

 

Very, very true. I hate this part most about being bi-polar. Its such an effort to maintain normality under normal circumstances that the people I can let my hair down around are the ones who get to see that nasty side of me. I hate it!

Sometimes bipolar people get mad/upset/happy about things and it's not necessarily because they are being manic or depressive or anything bipolar related at al

 

Once again, we're on the same page. Just because I have a mental disorder doesn't mean that I don't have normal reactions to things, as well.

 

It's just a very different world for them, an every day struggle that those who do not suffer from the disorder could not possibly understand. It's like living a life in your head that noone can see and another in the world that we let you see. I don't mean like schizophrenia or anything. but just the constant perseverance of thought. Manic thought. Depressive thought. But always...thought!

 

How true! Sometimes, I feel like a total alien. I feel WAY too much sometimes, and I know this. I have always wondered what it would be like to never have emotions that are upsetting and extreme, for both myself and my friends and loved ones.

 

I think it's worth it in a way, though. Its helped me be more creative then I would otherwise be.

[loveregardless]

I decided a while ago that in order to be fully in control of myself, my world, my disorder, everything...that I had to ACCEPT that being bipolar both contributed to the good and the bad of who I was. before that I never felt like I "fit in" or "belonged". I always felt like I was an alien. Now I feel like everyone else is an alien. =) I have always been more sensitive, more emotional, more caring, more EVERYTHING in every direction than anyone I know. But as much of a burden as that sounds like, it is also what I love most about myself. How hard that is to admit to oneself however. I was on meds for a while and I've been on just about all of them at one point. Except for lithium, but only because I refused!! I was on paxil and depecot for the longest time. and then when i hit a particularly strong bout of depression (my senior year when my mother left), the doc put me on an anti depressant (which i can't even remember the name of now) but it made me so manic i almost ended up hospitalized. I think that medications can only fix so much of the problem, and never without effecting the true personality of the individual. I know that I may feel more than everyone else, but the idea of NOT feeling scares me most of all. Sometimes i wonder how normal people do it. anyways, the most effective thing that I have found to treat what I call my "episodes" is a couple hits on the 'ol bong and then it goes away. I can finally laugh at myself when I get ridiculous or out of control, as opposed to freaking out completely. That was always the most terrifying for me, feeling like I was "out of control". But I don't envy "normal" people, I don't dwell on my "disease", I just accept that I am who I am for a reason. I may not understand that reason, I may never understand, but at least I can love myself REGARDELSS. Which is perharps the greatest gift on earth! (and it took me years of mental instability to arrive at it) Which is a hell of a lot more than most people can say about themselves. So I suppose that maybe mentally "ill" people are really "blessed". ?? Who knows?! Besides, normal people scare me. they don't seem to feel anything at all. =(

[YellowLioness]

Its strange isn't it? Normal people seem cold... maybe they are compared to us. Who knows? I've never been normal.

 

(my senior year when my mother left), the doc put me on an anti depressant (which i can't even remember the name of now) but it made me so manic i almost ended up hospitalized.

 

That same thing happened to me! I was on paxil and zoloft (one right after the other, not at the same time) and I freaked out, too! I was jittery and totally out of my head. I was actually suicidal. I had a really bad episode on New Years Eve of 2003-2004, and my mom took me to a psychiatrist.

 

It was actually then I found out that I was bipolar II, and that was why I had such a bad reaction to anti depressants.

 

However, recently I've heard that there are lots of people who have had adverse reaction to those drugs.

[loveregardless]

I personally think that everyone should choose to deal with their issues without meds, unless it becomes absolutely necessary, and in most cases, those people end up hospitalized anyway. Psychiatrists play the guessing game way too much for me, they hardly ever know how a person is going to react to a drug and they often have to prescribe more drugs to counteract the overwhelming effects of the first. It's ridiculous in my opinion. Plus the side effects and physical problems created by psych meds are RIDICULOUS. I don't trust "modern medicine" anyways. I am a natural kind of person. =) And honestly, the medication that I use now works 100 times better that those others ever did. Plus I still get to be me when it's all said and done. Of course that means that me and lioness are criminals subject to being thrown in jail for our choice of medication in this joke of a country. You were there for the weed convo, you probably read my opinion on THAT so we won't go there....

[YellowLioness]

I'm glad also that I'm no longer on my head meds. It really changed my core personality. I stoped being as outgoing, and I also stopped caring as much about everything. I was kind of in this odd, euphoric haze. Obviously, that's not a normal state of mind, but I convinced myself that it was better that I be drugged then lose my friends. I realized after that my friends would be there for me no matter what. Those that I weeded out weren't worth my time, anyway!

 

As for being a criminal? Sure, I am if self medication is a crime. I admit that my drug of choice contains THC and not alcohol. I prefer not having a hang over when I wake up. I prefer not puking. I prefer having enough common sense while on the drug to where I don't make any bad, moral decisions, as opposed to when I drink. I'm a much more mellow person when I smoke then when I drink.

 

Now, I'm not saying that I don't enjoy a cold beer on a hot, summer day; I just don't like to get wasted.

[loveregardless]

i'm not much for the alcohol. i prefer plants. =)

[faux]

Assuming that I was not misdiagnosed, and my medical records have not changed since those times, I am officially classified as Bipolar. For me, it was simply a matter of learning to control my moods. For the past few years, I've been living a very normal, healthy life, with no need of medication or therapy. For me, "Bipolar" just meant that I had a very bad home life growing up, and had to learn to deal with my emotions and moods.

 

Due to my drastic change, I really wonder if I ever had, or do have, any type of mental illness. It is a bit odd being tagged with something that is supposed to be extremely difficult to live with, and then being able to have taken my life into my own hands, having no problems for so many years. Follow-up evaluations, to satisfy my own curiosity, only left everyone in confusion about what had happened. I tend to believe that "mental illness" is mostly all in the mind. One can learn to control it.

 

There are times when every person becomes extremely emotional, and rides a mood roller coaster. I wonder if everyone had the money for evaluations, if we would all be Bipolar.

 

As for your situation, however, I'm uncertain why you would want to be around someone who is unhealthy. Being incolved with persons such as this is not easy, and not worth it, I think. Your boyfriend's illness is his own problem, and what he chooses to do is left entirely up to him. If you can stand it, being there for him, showing him that you care, should be enough.

 

 

YellowLioness:

 

As for being a criminal? Sure, I am if self medication is a crime.

 

You are a criminal if you are using illegal drugs. "Self medication" does not enter into the definition of criminal in this situation. If you are buying or selling, and using an illegal substance, this makes you criminal.

 

I admit that my drug of choice contains THC and not alcohol. I prefer not having a hang over when I wake up. I prefer not puking. I prefer having enough common sense while on the drug to where I don't make any bad, moral decisions, as opposed to when I drink. I'm a much more mellow person when I smoke then when I drink.

 

You may be more mellow, but your judgement remains severely impaired while using marijuana. I find it hilarious that you profess to have clarity of mind while under the influence of a mind-altering substance. It seems, to me, as though you may be simply playing into your illness. Supposedly, even though I tend not to agree with much of the Mental Health System, persons suffering from Bipolar I and II tend to have HIGHLY addictive personalities.

 

...I can't afford my meds (Lamictal) so I have to self medicate.

 

That was the tip-off for me. You can always afford your meds. If you cannot pay for them, there are numerous resources through which you can obtain them at a discount, or even for FREE via the government. One never "has" to self medicate. Self medication is a form of self injury. What you are doing is comparable to cutting your wrists to ease the pain.

 

I believe that I can infer that you would frown on someone who is an alcoholic. If an individual mentioned that he could not afford medication, or simply could not deal with something, so he chose to self medicate by drinking, I have a feeling you would not approve of this logic. If this is the case, it is interesteding that you do the same thing. Both instances involve a drug — a mind altering substance— yet you believe one is the greater evil.

 

If I knew you personally, I would be very concerned for you.

[loveregardless]

i'm not going to even get into the discussion of your being bipolar, because obviously you are not. Second of all, there was no attempt at asking for your opinion as to weather or not lioness or I are criminals. The comment was that we are considered criminals by a ridiculous and oppressive government for something that is fundamentally not a crime. This is not a thread about marijauna. We already read your opinions on the subject in that thread and are well aware of your extensive knowledge on the subject. Lastly, your definitions and descriptions of certain terms are far from accurate and I am about tired of hearing your constantly judgmental posts. You should be concerned for yourself as you are obviously suffering from something much worse than bipolar disorder.

[YellowLioness]

It's alright. Don't get upset. Not everyone likes Mary Jane.

 

If he prefers alcohol and wants to buy into the media, let him. Its not your job to change his mind. You can't anyway.

 

He is welcome to voice how he feels.

 

I do understand your frustration, LR. What he thinks isn't important in the scheme of how you run your life, or the decisions you make.

 

Your happiness and mental health is all that matters in this situation.

 

This thread was started about dealing with someone who has the bi-polar disorder. It was not intended for a debate on Marijuana.

 

Faux, if you would like to continue your debate, please post on a thread that is about that topic. I started one last Friday.

 

Also, please refrain from telling me how I do and do not react to certain chemical influences. As you know, different people react to different things differently. Thank you.

[loveregardless]

I apoligize, he does have the right to his opinion just as every one does, it is just his particular additude that is starting to rub me the wrong way. His post to several of the threads that I started aggravated me before this particular topic and I chose not to say anything about how critical and judgemental that I felt he was being then, and the comment about his being concerned for you just set me off a little. =) I sowry

[YellowLioness]

I am with you on this.

 

 

 

I really was just trying to be supportive of you, LR.

 

Its kind of like when you have friends who get name called in school and you have to say, "Eh, what do they know, anyway?"

 

I was peeved, too.

[loveregardless]

But I was a little hot sounding so I just wanted to make sure everyone knew I was nice and calm. No manic episodes or anything like that, everyone can stop worrying now. =) Haha. Sorry that was a little bipolar humor. Haha. I am cracking myself up today!

[Christie_in_LA]

Can some one provide me details on what bi-polar is?

 

Yellow, or Loveregardless... or someone.

[loveregardless]

the topic to get specifics. But basically it is a chemical imbalance in the brain, like many mental disorders are. It is characterized by extreme mood swings (this is a very general definition of course) and is synonymous with the term manic/depressive which is pretty self explanitory.

[YellowLioness]

But, in case you do,

 

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/bipolar.cfm

[Artifact]

There are a few other threads to look at on here as well about bipolar.

 

I believe 100% it exists, and I know that there are many different ways people function with bipolar. The best thing you can do it read about it, talk to doctors if you want, and talk to the people you know if have questions. (Your boyfriend for example, shontelevision.)

 

I live with a someone who is bipolar who CANNOT function without medication. (prescription meds y'all ) But he is bipolar/schizophrenic. Like I said, it's all a little different. I assume you are sticking with your boyfriend, so just get to know what you can about him, then you won't worry!