starla33 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 like lets say after a few months of dating not very seriously someone breaks it off with you in person. Do you act like you didn't care that much? Or would you be like noooooooo i really liked you.
candie13 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 breaking up in person... ouch, that hurts!!! Almost happened to me, this summer - but the SOB didn't have the courage to do it, after all. So I took closure and left by myself. I don't know, if it's not a good relationship, I'd feel a bit relieved, I guess. If I fancy the guy, i'd probably take the rejection bad - I hate being told "No". No scenes. No tears. I'd let the guy talk and most likely keep my comments to a minimum. Acknowledge. Shake hands. Leave. The usual... If I liked him and he was a good lay too... yeah, I'd prob put up a bit of a fight . But I'm not a drama queen. 1
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 Depends on how much I like the guy. Length of time doesn't mean much. I have only truly been dumped once, and I was a complete mess. We dated for 4 months and only official for 1. Timelines don't mean anything.
ltjg45 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 If I was in my younger 20s, I would depressed for weeks. Now, after getting burned in more ways than once, I would look at it and say, "I was expecting that anyway at some point. Oh well."
todreaminblue Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 like lets say after a few months of dating not very seriously someone breaks it off with you in person. Do you act like you didn't care that much? Or would you be like noooooooo i really liked you. I dont have to act....i am naturally stoic.......it hits me later, i am a private person when i am upset breaking down in front of someone is not what i feel comfortable with ...making others uncomfortable to me is worse.....deb 2
Author starla33 Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 I dont have to act....i am naturally stoic.......it hits me later, i am a private person when i am upset breaking down in front of someone is not what i feel comfortable with ...making others uncomfortable to me is worse.....deb yea i'm the same. I wonder how it is from a guys point of view...and i'm talking more casual really nothing like OMG you were so in love, but you were having fun and the person wants to go find something more serious.
Ruby Slippers Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 I've only been dumped once. I was upset, but mostly composed. I held back the bawling until he left. Even my cat followed me around the house whining for him. That part was torture! 1
Imajerk17 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 like lets say after a few months of dating not very seriously someone breaks it off with you in person. Do you act like you didn't care that much? Or would you be like noooooooo i really liked you. I am answering this question in the context of your FWB "breaking up" with you. If the guy was sleeping with you and he isn't clueless, he will have some understanding that "breaking up" might be hard on you. Just because a relationship wasn't officially defined doesn't mean that emotion isn't there on at least one side. I wouldn't think less of the girl for showing sadness or disappointment, even if she loses some control and cries.
Author starla33 Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 I am answering this question in the context of your FWB "breaking up" with you. If the guy was sleeping with you and he isn't clueless, he will have some understanding that "breaking up" might be hard on you. Just because a relationship wasn't officially defined doesn't mean that emotion isn't there on at least one side. I wouldn't think less of the girl for showing sadness or disappointment, even if she loses some control and cries. No i was asking how a GUY would act. Not me....I know how I act lol
Imajerk17 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 No i was asking how a GUY would act. Not me....I know how I act lol I am honest with my emotions. And at this stage, I would like to think that I wouldn't put myself in the situation of dating someone only casually whom I feel that deeply for. So I would probably be stoic. If I cared that much the relationship would either be deeper at this point, or I would have ended it myself by now (self-protection). 1
StanMusial Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 If it was a short and non-serious relationship I wouldn't care that much. I would probably just say "OK see you later" and then go eat a sandwich. 1
candie13 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 serial dumper here too (self protection), nice to meet you! 1
Author starla33 Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 serial dumper here too (self protection), nice to meet you! well i broke it off with this guy i was seeing because he doesn't want a relationship and i was getting too into it (i mean he was honest from the start about what he's looking for atm). He showed like 0 emotion so I'm kind of offended. You would think he would at least be a little sad the sex is going away...psh ANYWAY I'm not dating for a long while...break time!
candie13 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 for some men, it's really important to not let any emotion show. Good for you for letting go when you've realized you cannot play the game anymore! I know it sucks... aaaaaannnddddd, I also think it's good to take some time to let the wound heal. you will be very vulnerable, for some time, so dating is the biggest dis-service you can do to yourself! Keep posting, go out with your friends and be grinchy for a while... sucks with St.V getting closer, though 1
Author starla33 Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 for some men, it's really important to not let any emotion show. Good for you for letting go when you've realized you cannot play the game anymore! I know it sucks... aaaaaannnddddd, I also think it's good to take some time to let the wound heal. you will be very vulnerable, for some time, so dating is the biggest dis-service you can do to yourself! Keep posting, go out with your friends and be grinchy for a while... sucks with St.V getting closer, though I don't think i ever even saw him show ANY emotions the whole time I knew him. And I'm totally fine not dating for a long while too busy anyway
Lonely Ronin Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 I dont have to act....i am naturally stoic.......it hits me later, i am a private person when i am upset breaking down in front of someone is not what i feel comfortable with ...making others uncomfortable to me is worse.....deb I am the same.....
Lonely Ronin Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 yea i'm the same. I wonder how it is from a guys point of view...and i'm talking more casual really nothing like OMG you were so in love, but you were having fun and the person wants to go find something more serious. As a guy who is relationship minded, I can say that I don't show much of any emotion initially. And I experience more dumping because i won't ask you out unless I'm highly interested to start with. In private I have felt the full range or emotions. Indifferent, flaming pissed off, crawl in a hole and die devastated. How I react is based on my level of attachment, and how/why it ended.
superb Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 I act like a big biotch and usually tell the dude off. 75% of the time I leave before he can dump me though, if you see the signs you can just go in peace somewhat. 1
RebelWithoutACause Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 I'd felt a general sense of relief and gratitude to be freed from their company. On a more serious note, I had always been able to tell if I'm about to be "relieved of my girlfriend duties" so to speak. And i'd turned my emotional dial to sub zero at this point anyways, so when it did happen I couldn't care less. I can honestly say l've never actualy had my heart broken.
Eternal Sunshine Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 In actual relationships, I am dumped more. It's mostly because I don't enter relationships lightly and when I do, I am prepared to work at it and stick it out, more than most people are. I always see the dumping coming, there were always problems that we were unable to work out etc. I was never stunned so it wasn't hard to act composed..but I never begged or even cried. In casual situations, I dump more because I don't feel most guys are compatible enough for us to make it.. I am sorry to say OP, your situation was pretty cut and dry. He wasn't interested in a relationship, wasn't taking it seriously, wasn't emotionally invested...so there was nothing to act. I know you probably hoped for more..but if he truly cared, he would have offered you more at the time of dumping him.
runner Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 if my gf initiated the break up, i will let her speak her mind as much as possible whilst trying not to display too much over-the-top emotion (despite probably being torn up to shreds inside). when she finishes, i might offer a few light comments and ask for some clarification on certain things, but ultimately walk away quietly and let her know that i will be in touch. the last thing i would do is grovel, beg, plead or act needy about it.
mesmerized Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 if my gf initiated the break up, i will let her speak her mind as much as possible whilst trying not to display too much over-the-top emotion (despite probably being torn up to shreds inside). when she finishes, i might offer a few light comments and ask for some clarification on certain things, but ultimately walk away quietly and let her know that i will be in touch. the last thing i would do is grovel, beg, plead or act needy about it. I was never really dumped but I think I would do the same thing.
kaylan Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 well i broke it off with this guy i was seeing because he doesn't want a relationship and i was getting too into it (i mean he was honest from the start about what he's looking for atm). He showed like 0 emotion so I'm kind of offended. You would think he would at least be a little sad the sex is going away...psh ANYWAY I'm not dating for a long while...break time! Lmao....this thread is hilarious. Especially considering how you tried to call some other guy clingy for showing interest. Now youre dealing with a guy who cant seem to be bothered, and it apparently has gotten to you. So much that you need a break lmfao PS - I admire this guy for not being so needy regarding sex. Why would he be sad your sex is going away? Since you guys werent even serious and he said he didnt want a relationship, hes obviously got options.
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