MittensMcMittens Posted February 11, 2013 Posted February 11, 2013 Right so this is a problem that's been bothering me for awhile... basically my best friend's boyfriend is an ass. That's the nicest way I can put it. I'm at my wits' end over how to deal with him. First off, he has two main attitudes, especially when he is drunk (since I mostly see him on nights out, that's mainly the state I see him in)... he either is a pervert or acts like he hates me. When he is 'perv-mode', he ogles my boobs, comments on them crudely and generally acts like a 12 year old seeing a copy of Playboy for the first time. I must mention this man-child is nearly 30! I'm not the only girl he acts this way towards, but ... If this bothers my friend, she never shows it openly... she either laughs it off or just ignores it. Some other girls in our group complained about his perviness and she got very defensive and wouldn't talk to them for a while , saying his behaviour was just his 'weird sense of humor'. I don't see the humor in saying exactly what you would like to do to another girl's jugs in front of your girlfriend and the other girl's boyfriend! When is in 'd1ck-mode', he is just generally snarky and makes mean comments. Again, it's all under the guise of 'just joking around' and she plays along with it too... look, I understand that you don't want to fight with your man, but shouldn't you stand up for your friend if your boyfriend is being a dick to her?! He also is just arrogant and opinionated, and claims to hate bullies while always managing to seek out the weakest person in the group to belittle in front of everyone. In short, he is an ass. In any case, regardless of how he treats others, I just think he is not that great a boyfriend to her... She mentions he does ''such sweet things'' like driving to the store to buy her candy (big whoop!), but yet for the last 5 (!) years they have been going out, 90% of the weekends they have spent together have involved going to get drunk with his friends and watching sports. He never seems bring her shopping or for a day out doing what she would like! Of course, she never lets on that this bothers her to me, even when they have huge fights in front of everyone, she will just brush it aside the next day , saying ''oh, it was just a little tiff", when I know she must have been upset. Well, I've practically written an essay here. I just don't know what to do... she has given up her whole life to be with him it seems ( she moved to his town and works there now.), without getting much in return. Of course, you can never know what goes on behind locked doors, but I just think she can do so much better than this guy. But she's so defensive about him, I feel I can't be honest with her. any advice?
Toddbt12y1 Posted February 11, 2013 Posted February 11, 2013 This is the type of situation in which the person themself has to learn from. She would not listen to Her other friends and put them away -- she will you. The Guy is more important and frankly, she is acting foolish or must be desperate. A self-respecting woman would put him in place or it's byebye time. Some people have to learn the hard way....she is one such person.
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