Inviv_girl Posted February 10, 2013 Posted February 10, 2013 I have melted down this past few days. I have a feeling he is with the new girl and having fun, spending all weekend together and just them, just fun, just fun and leaving me in a trash! why I'm feeling this way?? WHY??? I go for cycling today to ease my mind and see the nice view of my country side. Got home and melted down again. Sometimes I just dont feel like going home at all. I hate the feeling to be at home where I can remember that a$$h0l3!!!! 1
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 11, 2013 Author Posted February 11, 2013 Guys?!? really 120 viewed and no one give a *****? 1
Jingle14 Posted February 11, 2013 Posted February 11, 2013 Guys?!? really 120 viewed and no one give a *****? Welcome to my world , that's certainly how it feels often when I post anything. Yes, it is ****, there's no getting away from that and I know the feeling of wanting to be away from home because of the reminders (the one who ripped my heart out and spat it back in my face lives in my neighbourhood and his parents live at the end of my road, so no escape). Is moving an option for you at all? Sounds like you are doing the right things though in keeping busy and getting out and doing things. It has to get better, doesn't it.
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 I'm hardly fall asleep still no matter how tired I am. I worked out like crazy during the day wishing to fast asleep at night but I didnt!!! I lay awake with tears on my face! I will move soon though as soon as I got the job. I bought this house I'm currently living and renovated with all money from my hard work the past few years so no way to sell it I will just go to work elsewhere and away from this house for few years! this is the best I can do.
Coping Vortex Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 I'm hardly fall asleep still no matter how tired I am. I worked out like crazy during the day wishing to fast asleep at night but I didnt!!! I lay awake with tears on my face! I will move soon though as soon as I got the job. I bought this house I'm currently living and renovated with all money from my hard work the past few years so no way to sell it I will just go to work elsewhere and away from this house for few years! this is the best I can do. We all feel what you are feeling. I have done nothing but think of all the scenarios my ex is in with her new guy right now. She is staying with him for four days in a row. They are probably showering together, cuddling having sex. The images never stop for all of us. We just have to take it and hope one day we forget them. 1
Jingle14 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 We all feel what you are feeling. I have done nothing but think of all the scenarios my ex is in with her new guy right now. She is staying with him for four days in a row. They are probably showering together, cuddling having sex. The images never stop for all of us. We just have to take it and hope one day we forget them. That's the most hideous part and imagination is a truly cruel thing.
H3Drvr Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 If you start imagining about you with someone else, who will love you and give you what you deserve...after a while, your ex will be nothing more then a faded memory. A bump in the road. As hard as it is to believe, there is someone out there that can give you better then what you had before! Upgrade, don't downgrade! I find it hard to believe this myself sometimes but I refuse to let my ex win this battle! 2
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 12, 2013 Author Posted February 12, 2013 What hurt the most is that he told my friend there's no love left for me anymore,he dumped me and that's it! I have done nothing wrong to him. I love him unconditionally and I know he loved me too but if his love was real can it just gone like that?? he is dating another girl now and seriously really rude to my friends when they meantioned or asked him about me. The love we shared was beautiful, it seems real and i cant get over him I tried anything i possibly could to get him out of my head but he keeps on coming back. I worked out crazy during the day wishing to just sleep at night but no.. I am overtired now and was only asleep for 1 hour and thats it! Now wide awake and my mind wandering around.. 1
cavalier99 Posted February 12, 2013 Posted February 12, 2013 Im assuming that one day we will all be over this. Not sure when but it will eventually arrive. Keeps me going i guess. Just hang onto that thought. You will recover whether you want to and fight recovery or not. We get dragged into the future without them. So yes you will get better. 2
Gingerxr2 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 What hurt the most is that he told my friend there's no love left for me anymore,he dumped me and that's it! I have done nothing wrong to him. I love him unconditionally and I know he loved me too but if his love was real can it just gone like that?? he is dating another girl now and seriously really rude to my friends when they meantioned or asked him about me. The love we shared was beautiful, it seems real and i cant get over him I tried anything i possibly could to get him out of my head but he keeps on coming back. I worked out crazy during the day wishing to just sleep at night but no.. I am overtired now and was only asleep for 1 hour and thats it! Now wide awake and my mind wandering around.. Honey I feel your pain and I know what your going through , the constant struggle of trying to distract yourself so you can get by one day without thinking about him !! Let me break it down for you 1- sit and think about him for 1 hour , cry your MASSIVE heart out , shout at him , punch your pillow , sit and watch the biggest girlie film you have and eat loooooooaaaaaaddds of I've cream till your sick . But most important is except it's over , and forgive him and yourself !!! 2 - Tell your friends to not to tell you what he's saying you don't want to know anymore as hard as it is that's it for now there's no point thinking he's coming back ATM he's gone . 3 - Concentrate on the beauty of you , do what you do best and be you , I'm really sorry but there isn't any cure for a broken heart , I'm still hurting after 7 months and I go through difficult days , but it does get better , His loss and someone else's gain !! Keep your chin up honey xxx we are always here xx 2
LeliiMarie612 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 I know this feeling, the same exact thing happened to me with my ex after he dumped me, with everything. It sucks, and I'm sorry it happened to you. It hurts because he let go of you so easily and he's being a serious Ahole about it. However, the best thing to do is just let it go. I know it's not easy, but it will be within time. Focus on you, and things that you like to do and things that will keep you moving foward in life. You won't ever forget him, but you will eventually be able to let go and feel happy again. Yes you had a beautiful love as you said, and it's terrible that he let it go, but that simply means it wasn't meant to be, and honestly with the way he's acting he did you a favor, because if he was worth it he never would've hurt you. You will feel like you're melting down at times, but those feelings will go away, your just going through a grieving process. It happens to anyone who goes through a broken heart. But it will fade away. Getting over a heart break is like mourning a loss of a loved one, and although it's difficult you eventually move on with your life. And think of it this way, it'll just make you a stronger person. You seem like a great person, and you deserve so much better. 1
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 13, 2013 Author Posted February 13, 2013 After 6 months post BU and Im still in a wreck. Somebody said what I'm feeling now it's not normal and not healthy really??? am I ??? crazy I know I'm in so much pain because of this a$$h0!!3, and I do everything I could to get over him. He took the best in me and this happen for the first time in my life.
cavalier99 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 After 6 months post BU and Im still in a wreck. Somebody said what I'm feeling now it's not normal and not healthy really??? am I ??? crazy I know I'm in so much pain because of this a$$h0!!3, and I do everything I could to get over him. He took the best in me and this happen for the first time in my life. Welcome to the club. I'm 4 months plus NC and feel like i should be further along. Just accept that this might go on for a while. I've decided i have no idea when I'm getting over this. Might be over a year..who knows. Just enjoy the ride! Yes we are all a little crazy right now. Some of us just hide it better than others. Cav 2
LeliiMarie612 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 After 6 months post BU and Im still in a wreck. Somebody said what I'm feeling now it's not normal and not healthy really??? am I ??? crazy I know I'm in so much pain because of this a$$h0!!3, and I do everything I could to get over him. He took the best in me and this happen for the first time in my life. Same here, and it's normal. Some people just take longer to heal than others. It could take months, or even years, to fully move on. Just don't worry about what others say, as long as your not completely dwelling on it you'll be fine. 1
Gingerxr2 Posted February 13, 2013 Posted February 13, 2013 After 6 months post BU and Im still in a wreck. Somebody said what I'm feeling now it's not normal and not healthy really??? am I ??? crazy I know I'm in so much pain because of this a$$h0!!3, and I do everything I could to get over him. He took the best in me and this happen for the first time in my life. I don't think anybody is crazy for being upset / devastated that they lost the one person in life that made them complete , but on the flip side you need to look at it as maybe this person wasn't right for you ? How could they do this to you ? Destroy you and move on without you? Honestly everything happens for a reason , you may not truly understand it right now but give it 6/8 months and everything will seem clearer , you'll be a different person And I bet you you'll say what was I wasting so much of my time thinking about this twit ??? Promise xxx 2
Mavrick009 Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 We all feel what you are feeling. I have done nothing but think of all the scenarios my ex is in with her new guy right now. She is staying with him for four days in a row. They are probably showering together, cuddling having sex. The images never stop for all of us. We just have to take it and hope one day we forget them. That's the most hideous part and imagination is a truly cruel thing. Again, I wish there was an "Agree" button, since I definitely agree with both comments, but definitely don't "Like" either of them happening to us in our respective situations. For me, the worst is this "holiday" tomorrow and all the TV that's been dedicated to it. It seems I can only watch sports programs and certain news shows to avoid all the "lovey-dovey" things that have been circulating since the weekend. Don't even get me started on all the movie award shows and the Grammys...
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 14, 2013 Author Posted February 14, 2013 When someone called me crazy to see how I am 6 months post BU and still in a total wreck, I think I agreed with them.. oh yeah I am crazy since he left me! knowing I cry myself out everyday, working out like crazy just to make me feel tired and busy, eating anything till Im sick.. I'm not hungry, I'm empty! But I think you guys right, everybody has different process of healing. And I am such an emotional person, I, indeed love him more than anything in the world and now he left me.. I'm still wondering somehow, how can he feels no love anymore, it was him who started it all. He chased me, crazy in love with me, say "I love you" everyday throughout the relationship, How can feeling changed just like that without nothing left?!?!!?!!!?!!?!?!!?!?!?!?? My friends said he never loved me, and he told him that, and he was so angry. He said he did love me and was so in love with me but now his feelings change! does it makes sense??
TheWeeknd Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 When someone called me crazy to see how I am 6 months post BU and still in a total wreck, I think I agreed with them.. oh yeah I am crazy since he left me! knowing I cry myself out everyday, working out like crazy just to make me feel tired and busy, eating anything till Im sick.. I'm not hungry, I'm empty! But I think you guys right, everybody has different process of healing. And I am such an emotional person, I, indeed love him more than anything in the world and now he left me.. I'm still wondering somehow, how can he feels no love anymore, it was him who started it all. He chased me, crazy in love with me, say "I love you" everyday throughout the relationship, How can feeling changed just like that without nothing left?!?!!?!!!?!!?!?!!?!?!?!?? My friends said he never loved me, and he told him that, and he was so angry. He said he did love me and was so in love with me but now his feelings change! does it makes sense?? I know exactly how you feel. When you give all the love you have to your partner and in return they leave you since they lost feelings. The way I see it if he truly still loves you, he will be with you no matter what. People change and for some people, they change for the worst within the relationship. The person that once loved you just as much as you love them now is no longer there. You just have to realize this and let go... its the only way to acceptance.
Love Bytes Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Feelin' like ballsack lol Better than yesterday, which is slightly better than the day before (which was terrible). Not an emotional person, but 10 weeks post BU, still hurtin' pretty bad.
RogerWallace111 Posted February 14, 2013 Posted February 14, 2013 Poor girl, I'm sorry you're dealing with that sh*t. It does massively suck. Particularly the way that no amount of will, logic, advice or wisdom can change how you feel and you have to just keep dealing with it. It will get better though. You're six months out, were you doing better before and then hearing new news about him brought it back ? Or have you been going through it this heavily the whole time..? I'm reluctant to advise it, and i'm not saying it in any douchey, patronizing way, but if after 6 months you're still having sleep and appetite problems, you may want to consider some sort of outside assistance. Just to tend to your own physical well-being. Even if you feel like you're not the type to do that sort of thing. Counseling, medical marijuana, maybe pharmaceutical drugs if they're low in risks or side effects. Lack of sleep and food can become a self-perpetuating cycle that will lead to you feeling worse and worse. 1
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 15, 2013 Author Posted February 15, 2013 You know the feeling one moment you thought you over him and you feel happy, another moment all of sudden he pops into your head and you just crushed?! melted down and can't get him out of your mind no matter what you do?! and that pretty much I'm feeling about him. With extremely hard of my first love left me, in disbelieve I carry on this wounded heart, accept its over.. time heals the wound.. don't know when, its likely happen to me in short time. He asked about me to my friends, my friend told me about it yesterday but she hasn't told him anything. I don't know what's that mean.. I dont want to speculate anything.. he told my friends there is no love left for me anymore then why the F*#< did he bother to ask about me to them?
Coping Vortex Posted February 15, 2013 Posted February 15, 2013 You know the feeling one moment you thought you over him and you feel happy, another moment all of sudden he pops into your head and you just crushed?! melted down and can't get him out of your mind no matter what you do?! and that pretty much I'm feeling about him. With extremely hard of my first love left me, in disbelieve I carry on this wounded heart, accept its over.. time heals the wound.. don't know when, its likely happen to me in short time. He asked about me to my friends, my friend told me about it yesterday but she hasn't told him anything. I don't know what's that mean.. I dont want to speculate anything.. he told my friends there is no love left for me anymore then why the F*#< did he bother to ask about me to them? I wouldn't too much trust in that he no longer loves you. During a break in NC my ex told me she was not IN love with me anymore just the memory of me. Well just last week she said that wasn't true she really was still IN love with me. Although she is not coming back. She is already in love with a new guy. Even though she still loves me. Go figure. So take solace in he may love you if that Helps you get through. But it won't change him trying to get back with you.
Addison312 Posted February 16, 2013 Posted February 16, 2013 Today I'm feeling like this forum might be holding back potential progress.
Author Inviv_girl Posted February 17, 2013 Author Posted February 17, 2013 Each time I woke up from my sleep, he's on my mind-still!! Recently I'm back to sleep in front of the tv in Tv room. I could fall asleep by watching tv, it helps me. I dont find peace in my bedroom, each time I lay myself to sleep on my bed, I will start crying, his voice everywhere and hanging on my ears, on my mind. I dont want to use any drugs to help me to sleep, avoid to get addicted.
BrettLost Posted February 18, 2013 Posted February 18, 2013 Inviv_girl, I am sorry you're part of the dumpee club. Interesting if any of us dumpees have ever been the dumper, thus could understand their reasoning, behaviour and seemingly night/day shift of attraction and feelings etc.... A previous poster 'cav' i think, pointed out hiding it all. Aside from your own imagination depicting your ex with their new partner constantly, resurfacing any pain you've probably worked very hard to get through, i'd say hiding your emotional suffering to endure your daily life around people, work etc is quite the almighty task also. Like someone else mentioned, all the couple related crap on tv is enough to tip you. Me, today i had a shocking meltdown, thats why im on here. My ex gf, is back overseas, so only my imagination can hurt me there, n it surely does. My ex w however..... Its a psychological and emotional war to have to see her and her bf every week, as a family with my kids, and take it in my stride as if im cool with it. To an extent i am, but again, my mind, filled with 8 years of memories with her and our kids, bubbles to the surface and when alone, no longer needing to hide it all, it comes flooding out. It's nearly been 3 years since wife left... I highly doubt time itself will heal anything....morelike u gotta use time to self-medicate with any happiness u want and for lack of a better word, selfishly, take what u desire personally. Chin up ey, there is hope and new love if u believe there is. Never think he/she was IT. The ONE. I learned this through my ex gf being attractive and compatable with me on a totally different level than i had with my now ex w. She was incredible..... that said, could a new girl possibly top her, absolutely.
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