rocksolid_bmb Posted February 10, 2013 Posted February 10, 2013 My boyfriend of 1yr 7months recently broke up with me about 16 days ago. He's 23 and I'm 18, and we've never had a break or been on/off before. It happened out of nowhere because I brought up that I knew he was lying to me that he's been ignoring me, and he kept on refusing until i gave him proof, that's when he finally admitted to it and i broke down. He kept telling me he can't do it anymore and that he can't hurt me anymore cuz he knows he'll continue to..(He has in the past) so iv'e always had trust issues with him. I tried my best to keep calm and make him feel better/talk him out of it but nothing worked and i started to beg. I left him alone with NC for about 5 days and txted him asking how he was but no answer. Then after 4 more days i called his house and he ignored it repeatedly. I txted him that night and was a lil bitchy but it worked cuz he replied the next day. I was confused though cuz he came off like it was all my fault and their was more to why he left me that he didn't tell me. He basically said he had nothing to say to me, wanted to be alone and left alone. I replied back once again bitchy(I never been w/ him before) telling him not to f'n blame me for anything ect.. And got him to reply again. This time his reply was veryyy long and thoughtful. He told me we were both to blame and that he's been thinking of ending it a few days before, but wasn't sure what to do and the lying i brought up about knowing led him to feel he can't keep going on living our lifes treating each other the way we were and what our relationship was becoming. After looking back at our relationship i learned the reasons why it got to the point that it did. -I have a very low self-esteem, he did everything to help, change my mind but it wouldn't help. Caused him to become feel very upset, frustrated, unsuccesful. -I became very needy, over emotional, not very understanding, basically smothered him. - That caused him to start to lie to me cuz he did everything he could to keep me happy and told me what i wanted to hear, even if it was the wrong thing to do. -This is both our 1st real relationship, so we didn't know how to handle things. Since that day he replied to me, its been 2 days later and he is still txting me back, talking about our relationship. He's said things like, he hasn't stopped loving/caring about me, he's just stopped thinking of me and now himself. He's still in love with me. It's been hard for him, but he tries not to think of it, not because he don't want to but because he doesn't wanna make it any harder than it is. He won't forget about what we had, and will always have for each other. It's not the end, he doesn't know what the future holds for either of us, but wants to be friends and still have me in his life. He's happy i understand, respect, and accept his decision to do this, no matter how hard it is. Said it's not all my fault, we were both just all new to it and didn't no how to handle things, but in time things may change. I haven't begged him at all since the night he left me, and have been nothing but understanding, respectful, and accepting. I still want him back more than anything and still feel he's the one. But i think he still feels like i can't live w/o him. My question is, do i still have a chance with him? Where should I go from here? Surprise him w/ The NC method for about a month? I just want him to know that after reading your book, I now know what we can both do to maintain a healthy relationship and resolve our past problems, but is that defiantly the wrong way to go by flat out telling him of it? What should i say/do now? Thank you for all your help -Ashley
destroyed4sho Posted February 10, 2013 Posted February 10, 2013 You've been reading books on how to get ex back? Not sure if that works and for how long....anyone have any experience in this?? Your bf has a nice case of GIGS (read the thread) He is gone, go NC. Its difficult thing to do..but eventually you will have to.
Recommended Posts