neveragain34 Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 Background: Chatted with a guy last summer (OLD), but I stopped talking to him before we had the chance to meet because I was seeing someone else and that was getting serious. Two weeks ago, the same guy sent me a text to say something had reminded him of me and he just wanted to say hello. Now single, I replied and we texted back and forth for a bit and he asked me out again. We had our first date two days later (last Thursday night). It went so well, we went out again Friday and Saturday. Date two was our first kiss. Date three some more kissing and heavy petting but I told him I didn't want to have sex because I like him and don't want to mess it up (as I've learned sex too soon often does, but not always). He agreed and said even if I wanted too, he wouldn't. (?) Fourth date was on Tuesday (lunch) and was great like the others. Fifth date was last night and was also great. Ended with more heavy petting (more than last time, but he didn't try to have sex). We have a lot in common (music, personalities, living healthy lifestyles, etc.), but haven't brought up any heavy stuff like past relationships, what we want, etc. Seems like everything is going along at a normal pace, but I just wanted to make sure since I'm not exacty used to "normal" and have a tendency to rush in and go for jerks! He isn't a smooth talker like I'm used to (or a pushover on the other end), which are also both good signs. I can tell he likes me in little things he says or does and there is definite physical attraction on both parts, as I can tell from the two make-out sessions we've had. Lol I'm probably overanalyzing the sex thing, but could it be possible he hasn't tried to have sex because he likes me? I haven't asked for it either and don't really want to yet, but again, I'm just so used to guys just wanting to get laid! Just being cautious for once.
soccerrprp Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 He can simply be a nice, respectful guy. Or he could have anxieties, insecurities about sex....who knows. Ask or wait.
Keenly Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 If I like a girl more than just a little bit I would hold off on the sex until the right moment presented itself. Not all guys are like me though.
Author neveragain34 Posted February 9, 2013 Author Posted February 9, 2013 If I like a girl more than just a little bit I would hold off on the sex until the right moment presented itself. Not all guys are like me though. That makes sense! He was supposed to leave town on Friday afternoon, but delayed his trip a few hours so we could go out. He told me from the beginning of making plans he'd like to see me if I didn't mind ending it earlier than usual so he could still make the drive at night. I would have been bummed if we had sex, then he couldn't stay after. I am answering my own questions through this! He is a nice guy. :-) Too bad the others before him have made me question things like this!
Estate Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 I wouldn't sweat it too much. If he's kept on dating you he likes you. Every guy is different but often yes, if a guy really likes a girl he may try to act respectful and hold off on sex. There's no hard and fast rules really... If I'm really attracted to a girl then it's only natural I want to sleep with her. Sleeping with her early doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing, but also if I think it's going to ruin things then I'd rather hold off and see her again, than sleep with her and not see her again. So every situation is different but from what you described, I think everything's ok.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 If he likes you, he wouldn't rush or pressure you for sex. If he really wants to be with you, he'll ask you to be his girlfriend first. That's what my ex did, we didn't have sex until we dated for more than 2 weeks. And we decided to make our first time special.
veggirl Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 No a guy who likes you doesn't WANT to hold off on sex...but a guy who likes you WILL hold off on sex if you ask him to. 2
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