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If you could experience your past relationships again would you do it?

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316 Established Member

316

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Even if the relationship would have the same end result?

 

I had a revelation earlier today... Despite the pain I'm going through at the moment I'd do it all over again without question. We made some great memories and I learned a lot from our 1 year/2 month relationship. She was my first love and I'll always be thankful for our time together. It's a shame it had to end so early though...

 

What about you guys? Do you regret your relationships or are you grateful for them?

KatZee Established Member

KatZee

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Nope. Never. My ex lied to me from day one. Cheated on me at month 4. Nothing about our relationship was ever real from his end. I feel like I wasted 3 years on someone who just toyed with me, who had no clue what he wanted. I was just some escape from his crappy a.ss life.

 

Waste. That's all it was. A huge damn waste. I wish I could get back those three years of my life.

GingerVixen Established Member

GingerVixen

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Even if the relationship would have the same end result?

 

I had a revelation earlier today... Despite the pain I'm going through at the moment I'd do it all over again without question. We made some great memories and I learned a lot from our 1 year/2 month relationship. She was my first love and I'll always be thankful for our time together. It's a shame it had to end so early though...

 

What about you guys? Do you regret your relationships or are you grateful for them?

 

I'm really grateful of my past relationship. I've fallen in love with a player who broke my heart but I'm grateful , and you know why? I've learned a lot from it. He's shown me what kind of man I must run away from. I'm not trying to be sobby or a hypocrite but I used to be a very innocent and naive girl in terms of relationships. This last one made me more clever.

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Hopeful714 Established Member

Hopeful714

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Hell f-ing no. I would not. I did not receive much of anything from my relationship that equaled all the pain I endured when, how, and after it ended.

 

It is my fault that I stayed as long as I did when the red flags were smacking me in the face. My bad.

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316 Established Member

316

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Nope. Never. My ex lied to me from day one. Cheated on me at month 4. Nothing about our relationship was ever real from his end. I feel like I wasted 3 years on someone who just toyed with me, who had no clue what he wanted. I was just some escape from his crappy a.ss life.

 

Waste. That's all it was. A huge damn waste. I wish I could get back those three years of my life.

 

Damn I'm really sorry to hear that. :(

 

Overall I feel like it's easier to move on from a relationship that ends on good terms than a relationship that ends badly. In the former situation at least you can look back on those memories fondly, while in the latter situation you're probably filled with regret and anger whenever you think about that person.

Keenly Established Member

Keenly

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If have to say yes... the good outweighed the bad.

KatZee Established Member

KatZee

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Damn I'm really sorry to hear that. :(

 

Overall I feel like it's easier to move on from a relationship that ends on good terms than a relationship that ends badly. In the former situation at least you can look back on those memories fondly, while in the latter situation you're probably filled with regret and anger whenever you think about that person.

 

Actually it was this relationship that allowed me to move on much easier. I walked away with my head held high, with my dignity intact and with the knowledge I wasn't leaving anything of any value.

 

When my relationship with my first love ended, it ended because of mistakes I made. I looked back with fondness and love and it took me YEARS to get over that relationship because there was nothing about him that was negative. I compared every guy to him and he always set the bar higher than them all. It was so hard to get over that.

 

Getting over my last ex was cake. I just walked out and he never saw me or heard from me again. Whatever girl he gets next, I pity. Because she's going to have to deal with the same s.hit I had to put up with. My ex is no prize. There's no redeeming qualities about him. I can't think of one nice thing to say about him.

 

So what's so hard about walking away from that? Nothing.

calgary Established Member

calgary

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it seems so far most guys would and most girls wouldn't

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316 Established Member

316

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Actually it was this relationship that allowed me to move on much easier. I walked away with my head held high, with my dignity intact and with the knowledge I wasn't leaving anything of any value.

 

When my relationship with my first love ended, it ended because of mistakes I made. I looked back with fondness and love and it took me YEARS to get over that relationship because there was nothing about him that was negative. I compared every guy to him and he always set the bar higher than them all. It was so hard to get over that.

 

Getting over my last ex was cake. I just walked out and he never saw me or heard from me again. Whatever girl he gets next, I pity. Because she's going to have to deal with the same s.hit I had to put up with. My ex is no prize. There's no redeeming qualities about him. I can't think of one nice thing to say about him.

 

So what's so hard about walking away from that? Nothing.

 

True... I guess what I mean to say is that it's easier to move on if you feel that you did everything you could to save the relationship (ending on good terms) instead of doing things detrimental to the relationship that lead to the breakup (ending on bad terms). Your ex is the one with the regrets while you're the one with your head held high.

treezy Established Member

treezy

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One year ago, my birthday wish was to get a boyfriend.

 

One year later, my birthday wish was to never get another boyfriend again.

 

Turns out my ex was one great disappointment and he totally ruined the image of love for me. I don't think I will want to step into another relationship again. I'm too traumatised by this.

williamshakespeare Member

williamshakespeare

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True... I guess what I mean to say is that it's easier to move on if you feel that you did everything you could to save the relationship (ending on good terms) instead of doing things detrimental to the relationship that lead to the breakup (ending on bad terms). Your ex is the one with the regrets while you're the one with your head held high.

 

Although I learnt a lot, I don't think I'd want to re-live the experience. The ending took too much out of me. I took up some vices and lost balance in my life. E.g., My Dad was unwell and I went to visit to show my support but all I could think of was her - It was just a shell of me that was there trying to show my support. I may not have another chance to see my Dad again as he lives far away and he has since had a stroke. I feel like the relationship robbed me of the chance that I had with my Dad.

 

Re: quote above, its definitely easier to move on if you feel you did everything to save the relationship. When we first broke up (she ended it), I felt shi*ty cos I was an ass to her. She gave me a 2nd chance and I was an amazing bf to her. Everything I did wrong the 1st time, I did right the 2nd time. Now its ending again, I'm still hurting but not as bad. I know I did all i could and there's a sense of peace that comes from that.

Edited by williamshakespeare
typo
KoKo0 Established Member

KoKo0

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Never EVER! a complete waste of time and energy... :mad:

Going back to an ex, is like reading a book and knowing the end.

Pinky777 Established Member

Pinky777

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When my relationship with my first love ended, it ended because of mistakes I made. I looked back with fondness and love and it took me YEARS to get over that relationship because there was nothing about him that was negative. I compared every guy to him and he always set the bar higher than them all. It was so hard to get over that.

 

This is how my last relationship was, although it ended with mistakes we BOTH made, he was not blameless though I was the one who probably made more of the rookie mistakes (being too needy, putting too much pressure on him, etc.). My ex is great guy and like you with your first love I feel like he set the bar really high and it's going to take a long time to find someone like him again. Yes I would do it all over again, even knowing we'd break up if I could just do a few things differently and keep my dignity intact along the way. I had a great time with him when things were good and learned a lot about myself, even when they weren't.

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316 Established Member

316

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Never EVER! a complete waste of time and energy... :mad:

Going back to an ex, is like reading a book and knowing the end.

 

Not necessarily. Like an above poster said sometimes the good times outweigh the bad.

 

It just depends on what kind of relationship you had with your ex prior to the breakup.

grace777 Established Member

grace777

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Without hesitation, yes. I loved her and she loved me. We shared over 3 years of harmony and beauty. The good far outweighs the bad. However, I will say, that given the chance - I would have reacted differently to the breakup. In fact, if I could re-do the last two weeks of September and the first two weeks of October, I would.

 

Not to say the outcome would be different, although maybe. But if I'd known then, what I know now - i would have responded differently.

KoKo0 Established Member

KoKo0

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Not necessarily. Like an above poster said sometimes the good times outweigh the bad.

 

It just depends on what kind of relationship you had with your ex prior to the breakup.

 

I agree, but most cases they don't work out.

Only a handful few work out...

fancy feast Established Member

fancy feast

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Nah. Onward and upward.

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