nineyearsgone79 Posted February 8, 2013 Posted February 8, 2013 Hey Guys, My bf's company is sending him to vegas for a conference for 2 days. He a few months back told me he wanted me to go and we could stay a few extra days (around a week).. and turn it into a vacation. At the time my work was very slow (I work for myself).. i told him i couldn't go because no work etc. He told me "don't worry about it" and a few times I said I couldn't go he'd say "I'll take care of it don't worry about it." Anyway, fast forward to a month and a half before the trip. He told me I should book my airline ticket. I said what? .. He said now is the best time that it should be around 400 dollars or so. I've gotten some work since then but not much maybe around 1500 a month so not really any position to go on a trip and my insurance bills just came due. Anyway, i told him "i thought you said don't worry about it".. he said "yah i did .. it's only 6 days don't worry about it." I told him i thought he had offered to take me.. he said he was going to cover the hotel but not my ticket. Anyway.. what should i do now. He's all upset because he said " we had this planned for a while.".. when in fact i thought he had this planned out. I didn't even really want to go to vegas but since he wanted me to come along and was bringing me i thought i'd go. We've been dating since April 2010 and i'm 33 (almost 34) and he's 31. Help? What should i do? Thanks!:(
clia Posted February 8, 2013 Posted February 8, 2013 What should i do? Tell him you can't afford to go, but that he should go and have a wonderful time. If he is so immature that he can't understand that financial problems can prevent vacations from happening...well...you might be better off without him.
TaraMaiden Posted February 8, 2013 Posted February 8, 2013 At the risk of sounding materialistic, in your shoes, I wouldn't go. Sorry. It's not as if you're in your early 20's and mom and dad can sub you some cash, which you'll pay back.... You're an adult, working for yourself, and probably relying on an irregular income. It's too risky to invest money in something like this. In your shoes, I also would have assumed he was proposing to treat me the full sum. But I would also probably have added something along the lines of, "Well, I will pay you back, but as much as I can, when I can. I can't make it regular payments, but I will reimburse you....." In matters like this, it's fatal to make assumptions, or be ambiguous.... You're going to have to bite the bullet and make a decision, but sadly, I'd pass this one up, and notch it up to experience (unless he can also pay the flight - and you'll pay him back, as I've said.....)
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 (edited) "Sorry honey. Can't afford the airfare or the trip. Hope you have a great time in Vegas! Send me pictures.:)" The largest cost for the trip has been covered--the week-long hotel stay. I wouldn't expect a BF to pay for my flight on top of that, or incidentally, my personal meals and entertainment costs while he is in meetings. It seems unreasonable and very excessive to me. But that's me. I also wouldn't borrow money from him It would feel as if I was turning him into a glorified wallet. We all view things differently. I only agree to participate in things I can easily afford on my own. That's my comfort level. You've been together for almost three years now. How have you shared vacation and weekend getaway costs in the past? Edited February 9, 2013 by Cutiepie1976
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 9, 2013 Posted February 9, 2013 Ah and it strikes again! Lack of communication ladies and gents. Hate to say it love, but you should have clarified this long ago. I don't know anyone who considers "planning" a trip a mere chat about going. Let him go, tell him you can't, and have a sit down about expectations and talking things out better so things like THIS don't happen. It is shocking to me that in your 30's, something like this could happen especially after being together for almost 3 years.
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