Confused420 Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 This is stupid, I thought I was done with this site but I feel like I've just been pushed back right to square one. Over the last week or so, I've been having dreams of me and my ex being back together, watching films, falling asleep together, only to wake up and realise we're still broken up. It's killing me. I mean, we've been broken up for over two months and NC for over one, the relationship was only 3 months long ffs. I thought I was getting better but evidently not. This morning was the worst of them all, I genuinely woke up feeling happy because we were together only to be crushed when the realisation hit. I went and checked her instagram, which I know was stupid, but I couldn't stop myself. Surely I should be feeling better now? I mean, the break-up seems fresh again. I think I know what brought it on. I have been drinking heavily for around a month now, up until Sunday when I realised it was turning into a problem. Haven't had a drink since Saturday now. But even so, surely I should be getting over her now? I was, but I've been knocked so far back. Since the dreams started I've been thinking of her every minute I've been awake. Honestly, I feel lost and confused, more than ever now.
theLWord Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 Sorry you are being haunted as well. I've been broken up with my ex for about four months and occasionally get dreams of her still. the only thing I hear is time will heal it. I know that's been true with my exes in the past.
RogerWallace111 Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 It's sh*tty but completely normal. It's been almost 5 months for me and I've been dreaming about her again once or twice a week for the past few... After a long spell of that not happening. I think it just has to do with where your mind's at. I was in a period of super exciting progress, in multiple areas of life, that had me feeling better than ever, feeling completely content to be single, etc. After I got kind of used to all the changes, and daily life started to feel monotonous again, the dreams returned. As hard as they are to "get used to", that may be the only option. No matter how much your logical brain accepts the situation, knows you're gonna be ok, or even knows you're better off, if you were deeply in love there will be some lasting mark on your subconscious. At least I think that's the case for me. I have lonely moments of course, but 95% of the time I'm relieved & excited to be free of my ex, definitely know it's for the better, and have no lack of hope as far as future prospects. Yet, there is still something in my heart for her, I mean, I no doubt loved her more than I've ever loved any other girl. And lastly, the drinking, yeah... That's almost definitely got a lot to do with it. Alcohol ****s with your REM sleep and your ability to dream, similar to the way marijuana does. And with both, when you cut them out after a period of extended use, dreams tend to come back and be very vivid/intense... You'll be ok man. You can't control what dreams you have but their effects on you will lessen in time, and they'll become more and more infrequent.
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