Ohhdeeer Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year now. We have always been affectionate with each other, and never would i have questioned her fidelity until now. Before me she was with her ex on and off for four years, and after the breakup she kept distance from her friends because they;re all a group that hung out and went to college together. Now they're all back in town, then she met me. As mentioned, things have been great until about two weeks ago. I go out of of town for a week, knowing that she'd hang out with all her girlfriends on Friday, with a good chance that her ex would be there. A few nights after i return, I go to her house a night while she's working with flowers, a bottle of wine, and fruits and veggies for her fridge. As i enter the bathroom, i notice a comb on the sink. Women don't normally use combs. Then in her room i notice in her top drawer that there's only one condom, when there should be two . Last time we made love i jokingly said " there better be 2 condoms when i get back an laughed," but that was a month and a half ago. So then i started to snoop and looked at her computer. She had google searched her ex boyfriend the day before, which led to a facebook page. in Preview photos, the most recent were of him and her from when they were together. The following day after lying in bed with her, while getting dressed to leave, I asked " do you still have the condoms?" she said yeah. Then i mentioned there was only one. Then her excuse was that they were sitting on top of her dresser when her mother came over to visit and she swiped them and threw them in the trash. She had said she thought she had thrown both away, but one was hiding in plane sight in her top drawer, and these condoms were attached! Then i admitted to going on her computer and found she was searching her ex boyfriend. She says it was her friend, looking up something cool that he was working on. I asked when, and she couldn't tell me. her search history shows Tuesday of that week, then she admits to searching for his 'cool' project after her friend had because she hadn't had a chance to see it. None of these stories add up. She keeps telling me how she loves me, and how considerate she is of me when i'm not around. She sounded convincing as hell but i cant tell you why. I love this girl and dont want to believe the worst. We end up talking about this the next morning, and she got so frustrated that she showed me a text from her ex, saying " I miss you dear". She showed me that she had taken a screen shot of that text, sent it to her best friend which is also very close to me, making fun of his text to her. This settled me for a bit, thinking she's doing the right thing when I'm not there. Then her and her friends come to my bar for my superbowl viewing party. One of my good friends is their friends boyfriend, who i found standing outside smoking while they're all talking. I found out later that she was telling them her story of the missing condom, google search, etc almost prepping them. My friend who is her best friend found the story to be shady. How could it not be? The point is, i love this woman, but am eating myself up inside thinking about this bc there is no clear answer. Either I accept the story and move on, or leave her based on red flags, and nothing concrete. I would love some advice on what to do.
Toddbt12y1 Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 Leave her. She is cheating and lying. Don't be a foolish lil doormat. 1
weee111 Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 Leave her. She is cheating and lying. Don't be a foolish lil doormat. What Todd said...
SJC2008 Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 Her being in an on/off R for 4 years is a huge red flag. Usually when a relationship is that type, it's the man who's on/off and the woman is chasing. They keep "chasing" becuase they have issues. Now you are with her and don't keep leaving her so you aren't putting her into chase mode. I say she's cheating, hope you find otherwise.
Arnissa_N Posted February 7, 2013 Posted February 7, 2013 Yep, she could be cheating, or she could be itching to cheat...
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