What is my gut trying to tell me?

[loredo21]

Loredo;

Question;

If you weren't going to be w/your husband, married. Who would you be with?

 

myself.

[loredo21]

Thanks everyone for the advice, the 1st couple days were really hard and confusing. But H and I had a serious breakthrough last night. I brought up the fact that my gut was going crazy and I was having an "allergic reaction" to the R. We talked for about an hour and got to the bottom of everything. When he looked at me and said "when you're happy, i'm happy. when you're miserable, i'm miserable"...I just broke down. I haven't cried so hard in a while. I asked him through my tears "how could he love me so much?"....we talked a little more and I just looked at him and felt the urge to go over and hug him and we cried into eachother's arms. I told him how much I loved him and he the same. And I realized THIS...THIS is what true love is. THIS is way better than any butterfly initial ooey gooey kind of love. It's grown up. It means something. We've been together 10 years. And that means something! I realized then that I am IN LOVE with my H. That I was so lost beyond belief that I couldn't see that love anymore. He loves me more than any man ever could and treats me better than any man ever would. I wish I hadn't have hurt him the way I did, but we are moving forward. I am 100% sure that this is where I want to be. I don't know, something just clicked last night and we both felt it. We even kissed on the lips (something we haven't done in 6months). And I just felt a fondness for him again. I feel so much better today! YAY!

[woinlove]

Thanks everyone for the advice, the 1st couple days were really hard and confusing. But H and I had a serious breakthrough last night. I brought up the fact that my gut was going crazy and I was having an "allergic reaction" to the R. We talked for about an hour and got to the bottom of everything. When he looked at me and said "when you're happy, i'm happy. when you're miserable, i'm miserable"...I just broke down. I haven't cried so hard in a while. I asked him through my tears "how could he love me so much?"....we talked a little more and I just looked at him and felt the urge to go over and hug him and we cried into eachother's arms. I told him how much I loved him and he the same. And I realized THIS...THIS is what true love is. THIS is way better than any butterfly initial ooey gooey kind of love. It's grown up. It means something. We've been together 10 years. And that means something! I realized then that I am IN LOVE with my H. That I was so lost beyond belief that I couldn't see that love anymore. He loves me more than any man ever could and treats me better than any man ever would. I wish I hadn't have hurt him the way I did, but we are moving forward. I am 100% sure that this is where I want to be. I don't know, something just clicked last night and we both felt it. We even kissed on the lips (something we haven't done in 6months). And I just felt a fondness for him again. I feel so much better today! YAY!

 

I'm glad for you that you are reconnecting and feeling better and more sure about your decision. But, at the same time, from everything one reads on LS, it sounds like you need to be prepared for a roller coaster. So many strong emotions tied up with affairs and betrayal, that it isn't likely all to be smooth reconnecting. So prepare for that too. Also, when you say how can he love you that much, it makes me wonder if you maybe still have a lot of work to do in forgiving yourself. That's important too. Anyway, best of luck to both of you.

[loredo21]

I'm glad for you that you are reconnecting and feeling better and more sure about your decision. But, at the same time, from everything one reads on LS, it sounds like you need to be prepared for a roller coaster. So many strong emotions tied up with affairs and betrayal, that it isn't likely all to be smooth reconnecting. So prepare for that too. Also, when you say how can he love you that much, it makes me wonder if you maybe still have a lot of work to do in forgiving yourself. That's important too. Anyway, best of luck to both of you.

 

Oh I definitely do! I will be in IC for a very long time. I know it is going to be a lot of work...We are making lists of what we want to see happen and what we need from one another and the things we want out of life. Going over them and comprising on them Sunday. I know I sound excited. which I am. But I know to be smart about it and not to put too much stock into how i feel "today", because as my posts go to show I have already been on a roller coaster ride of emotions. It was just nice to feel that strong of a feeling toward H again. I haven't had that in so long!