ow9 Posted February 4, 2013 Posted February 4, 2013 I posted in the “Second Chances” forum, but I am thinking this might be a better place. My ex and I were married and one day he said he did not want a wife, he did not want a house, and he did not want kids. He said he never loved me and he was leaving. So, I cheated on him. I'm not proud of what I've done, but that is another discussion for another forum.* Oddly enough, through the divorce, the ex-husband and I remained close. We talked every day, hung out all the time, were intimate, etc. But, if I brought up us being together again, he would freak out and say he wants nothing to do with me, as he “doesn’t know what he wants in life.” I decided to start over and moved 1,500 miles last week.*On my last day there he asked if I would let him know I had arrived in my new location safely.* I said no, as I believe NC is best for us.* He said he would call anyways, in a few weeks, knowing I won’t answer, because he “has” to know how I am doing.* He said he doesn’t know if he can go NC, but doesn’t necessarily want to be with me, either. What is he doing to me?* Why is he doing this to me?* Even in NC, 1,500 miles away, I’m sitting here wondering if he thinks of me, and if not, why does he keep leading me on? Help.* I’m climbing the walls missing him.
gonefishin Posted February 4, 2013 Posted February 4, 2013 Hi there... I don't think I always know the answers here but I think It's probably safe to say he does miss you...maybe not enough for a Relationship again but be logical you spend so much time together and then that Person is now not just down the road or round the corner it will hit in.. I'm sure he misses you you were a huge part of his life too.. Its natural Just keep focused maybe join the local gym and stay busy!!! Meet new friends and try not spend too long dwelling on him..
Author ow9 Posted February 4, 2013 Author Posted February 4, 2013 In a sick way that made me feel better. I want him to pine over me; cruel, I know. I do need to stay busy! You're definitely right. He always is and maybe that's why he's handled it so well. Why do some people who "don't know what they want in life, " (and I'm sorry, but that's a load a crap), keep stringing you along? Why can't he just let me go if he's not 100% sure he wants to be with me? Gr...
Suziee Posted February 4, 2013 Posted February 4, 2013 He ended the relationship and, if that wasn't enough, told you he never loved you. Be glad you're rid of him and don't give a hoot about what he's feeling or thinking about. He wants contact because it boosts his ego to know that you still care about him. 1
Author ow9 Posted February 5, 2013 Author Posted February 5, 2013 Is that something just said in the heat of the moment? Or, is it possible to be in a relationship with someone who never really did love you?
Suziee Posted February 5, 2013 Posted February 5, 2013 I don't know sweetie, it could be either or neither. It's just a very hurtful thing to say and I don't think my pride could just ignore something like that. It's not like he apologized to you and took back what he said.
gonefishin Posted February 5, 2013 Posted February 5, 2013 Keeping busy is the key.. No one on here can tell you if he's missing You .. I think in all likely hood as I said someone significant leaves your life you miss thm somewhere along the road sooner or later.... The no contact might help you but try not to read exes it can really frustrate and hurt you more .. You may think they don't care but its possible they can bluff so much better as we tend to wear our emotions on our forehead.. Don't worry bout him for now and try get settled.. Exciting time ahead for u in a new town ..embrace it ... Hope ur ok ..it's not easy and everyone on here knows it ..
darkmoon Posted February 5, 2013 Posted February 5, 2013 he likes you - but - he doesn't like marriage/responsibility
Author ow9 Posted February 5, 2013 Author Posted February 5, 2013 Thank you so much for your responses. So, if he contacts me just to "check in," I should ignore him you think? And I agree. He just wants to do what he wants to do. But, why be in a relationship or get married in the first place then? Sigh. It makes me feel better that others aren't doing so hot today either. I think I'll make LS my Valentine :-)
Recommended Posts