BUBS Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 It has been 3 1/2 months since our official break up, 4 1/2 since things started to unravel. I have been through hell and I have a feeling I have a long way to go before the sun shines consistently. I still have my moments. I still get down. I am starting to do my best to manifest a life and goals for myself as an individual. I am finding that a lot of the things I desire most seem to be things I'd imagine he would find attractive, or things I felt got taken away from me when he chose to end our life together which is odd. Do you think this is normal? In the beginning of my break up I threw myself into the pain. I dwelled. I cried. I broke down entirely. I put off school, gained weight, and isolated more so than I have ever. Since the new year I have been doing somewhat of the opposite though not in a healthy way. I have been going out a lot with friends, running around as much as possible. What I've noticed is that I function much better staying busy but almost feel like I'm hiding the pain rather than healing. When I get alone and can't find the right tv show, perfect blog, or something to occupy myself, I start to get down again. Do any of you have this issue? Do you feel like this is a part of healing or that its just running from the pain?
Loveandpeace14 Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 I honestly feel the exact same way. I feel like I'm putting off the pain, so I'm not even sure if I'm healing or not. I was exactly like you at the beginning. I still have my moments and everything too. I'm also starting to put my life back together, I've lost quite a bit of weight(the healthy way), grades gone back up, going back to gym and even playing soccer again, so I like to think that I am healing. I'm trying to be a better person and focus on myself. I too am having goals for myself. Doing the things you love and being with your friends really make you feel better. I also start to feel down when I'm alone in bed with nothing to do but I find that quite normal even for people who aren't going through a break up to feel down over other reasons, it just seems to feel worse when a broken heart is the reason. Just remember, you're beautiful and it's his loss. He'll regret it sooner or later.
denxnis Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 I'm at 3 1/2 months as well. Look at this as if it were a physical injury. If you scrape your knee you might get a small scab which will soon heal and be unnoticeable. If you injure yourself badly, large cut or gunshot, the recovery period will be quite extensive and will most likely leave a scar. From an emotional standpoint. You end a short-term relationship or something not so serious your recovery is fast and you eventually may even completely forget about the relationship. You end a long-term relationship in which you were in love with someone your recovery will be quite extensive and the memories will always remain. 2
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