kaylan Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 I wouldn't split 50/50% with someone cheap, I have done that, he actually said the exact same thing your guy is saying "no worries I'll pick up the difference" when the reality is that he'll be leeching off you. Cheap people are just that, cheap. I can't stand them. Split rent and bills based on % of what you two make. He makes 3000 and you make 2000? He pays 60% and you pay 40% of the bills. Shes the one who sounds cheap imo 1
StanMusial Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 You said he's your "new" guy. Which means you are still evaluating his potential as a mate... unfortunately it seems he is coming up short in the income column. It also seems that you are couching your argument a certain way to justify your misgivings. I hope it works out for you but I doubt it will.
phineas Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Did you miss the fact that I'll be making 3-5 times more than his salary in a couple years? And that I intended having to pay for majority of our children's expenses, ie college 100k-250k Nothing is assured in this economy. The fact that you are looking at projected salaries down the road tells us that you are more focused on money than anything else. 1
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Ok well this might be weird but my parents split their mortgage. Basically my mom has her account with her money and my dad has his and then they have a household account that they put half of their money in and the household account pays for stuff that me or my brother need and bills and stuff like that. I think it's fine. I think if you have a problem with it then talk to him about it. 5
xpaperxcutx Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Even if he is the one, how long have you known him and dated him? I can see where the gold digger comments come from as you're more stuck on knowing the figure of you checkbooks than you do about the developmental stages of a relationship. Money issues can always sort themselves out if you want it bad enough and then there's always a prenup.
phineas Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Shes the one who sounds cheap imo This. It sounds like BOTH make enough money to afford said place on their own & still have money left over. Yet because she makes less she expects him to pay more. That doesn't make sense. If she was living paycheck to pay check then i can see an arrangement based on percentage of incomes. My ex paid $400 month for her rent with a roomate + her half of the utilities. She also made slightly more than half my pay. I charged her $400 a month to live with me. Considering my mortgage was $800 a month & I was paying all the utilities that was more than fair because she also had an extra chunk of money now. It worked for both of us & was fair. But if I met someone who could afford my mortgage & we moved in & she said she should pay less because she makes a little less than me? No thanks jeff. If she made more i'd still insist on splitting 50/50. 4
KungFuJoe Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Umm...op is pulling all your legs. Look at "her" thread and post history. 3
kaylan Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Wow...guys have too much time on their hands when they create fake threads in order to bring down women. Are they that butthurt by their dating life or lack thereof?
KungFuJoe Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Wow...guys have too much time on their hands when they create fake threads in order to bring down women. Are they that butthurt by their dating life or lack thereof? Pretty much. Can't find a woman to like you?...make em look bad.
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 This. OP seems more concerned about money than love. A home is a 50/50 arrangement in my eyes. I didnt pay less rent because I made less money when I had a place with housemates or even my brother. Make a big deal out of this OP, and you will lose a good guy. Hes only 30...so hes got options. Remember that. Its 2012...and a guy whos 30 didnt grow up with old fashioned values. A 30 year old grew up in a time where most women work, have their own cash, and are perfectly willing to contribute their share to a household. Well, younger women are willing...since your older, it makes sense that you arent on the same page. He treats you to dinner once or twice a week and youre complaining? Most girls my age (im 26) would love that, despite them still wanting to pay their fair share of things. Thank god Im the age I am now. So when you make more, youre OK with paying 75% of living expenses? Thats only fair if you expect him to do it now If he slacked off so much compared to you, why are you older and in your 30s, yet he still makes more than you? I get the feeling that you are overestimating or simply being to dreamy about the money you think you will make in the future. Theres no guarantees in life, and he shouldnt be paying more than his fair share based on the idea that you MIGHT pay more in the future. Its funny how everyone is caught up on judging how much money I can or can not make. The root of the thread is asking everyone is it acceptable that 2 people living together split the rent?? What about when you're married? I am actually under 30 and have a signed contract and will in fact be making at least 3 times more. Also, maybe I'm in med school now and are graduating at the top of my class. I'm not going to bother asking how much money you make now I also think asking someone 60/40 split now is not out of the question especially when he trusts that when I will take over other bills in the future. I never said I expected him to pay for everything! I'm not sure where people have mistaken that part.
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 I don't believe for one second you'll be making 3x as much as him and still be together. Your attitude is typical of a woman who expects the man to pay everything. "old fashioned", questioning splitting as if the man has to pay the rent, period, him of course paying for the extras because he's a man. No way on earth you'll EVER be the main provider, better move on to a rich guy who'll keep you for the rest of your life. Someone's a little bitter about life
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 All the men I dated in the past made a substantial amount of $. The new guy I'm talking to may be the one! We've already been talking marriage, kids, etc. Only issue is that he makes a little less than what I'm used to. He is younger so he's not at the top of the pay scale yet. Other men I went on dates with were 38-42. My bf is only 30. He grew up in strict family where his parents never bought him a single birthday gift or christmas present. So essentially, he is cheap! haha. He says he doesn't want to be like his parents but he subconsciously is. We're talking about moving in together in 6 months but he wants to SPLIT the rent. I make less for now, but will probably triple his salary in 3-4 years. He's mentioned that he has money for down payment and has to buy me engagement ring. If we split the rent, he says of course he'll pay for extra's like taking me out to eat etc. So is this fair?? What about after marriage? splitting the mortgage?? Uhm... how long have you guys been together for? Anyways, it is bothersome how offput you are about him saying splitting the rent. What did you expect? For you guys to be dating and him pay for everything? If you guys are serious enough to consider moving in together and are already talking about marriage, you are serious enough to talk about finances now and when you DO get married. Sure, it is all fun and games planning and dreaming, but finances are the number one reason why relationships fall apart, and if you guys truly are this serious... it is scary that you haven't actually sat down and talked about it. Your whole attitude is disgusting to me though. What did you seriously expect? Slow your roll, 6 months is a long ways away. For now, discussing splitting rent should be wanted.
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 Its funny how everyone is caught up on judging how much money I can or can not make. The root of the thread is asking everyone is it acceptable that 2 people living together split the rent?? What about when you're married? I am actually under 30 and have a signed contract and will in fact be making at least 3 times more. Also, maybe I'm in med school now and are graduating at the top of my class. I'm not going to bother asking how much money you make now I also think asking someone 60/40 split now is not out of the question especially when he trusts that when I will take over other bills in the future. I never said I expected him to pay for everything! I'm not sure where people have mistaken that part. Gotta remember love... you AREN'T married yet. Jumping the gun a bit don't you think? When you first move in with someone, you SHOULD split it evenly. That way it is equally both of yours apartment. When you guys DO get engaged, then you can worry about how to handle money. Some couples will split evenly, some do it based on pay, some just throw it all together and do what is yours is mine. For now, work on just getting to know the guy.
miss_jaclynrae Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 Damn... just read OPs thread history and I feel like I have been rick rolled . 1
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 I would probably pay for damn near everything if I was to date a girl in my age range. Most 18-25 year old girls earn next to nothing nothing while in college and/or are just out of college and are barely earning 30K a year It would make no sense for me to make her pay for stuff when she has student loans/debts and she's earning very little money compared to my income Thanks for answering the question. To everyone else, I never said once a man should pay for all! I was fortunate enough to date previous men where money was no issue. I like this new guy so since this is all new, all I'm asking is if splitting the rent is ok. So I see splitting rent is fine before marriage All I needed to know
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 I wouldn't take my word as a good general rule for how most men feel Most men nowadays seem to want things to be 50-50 financially. I'm not in that category because I'm fortunate enough to be doing well for myself If the man does not make a lot then him asking to split rent is acceptable. Got it
Els Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 Huh, I could've sworn that there was a consolidated thread for this in the Dating forum. Where'd that go?
crude Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 Ummm...aren't "gold diggers" (which you men here just LOVE to label any woman who breathes) supposed to aim HIGHER than themselves? She already SAID she's going to make TRIPLE this guy's salary in a few years. A woman can make a man pay all the bills NOW, with the vague notion that somewhere down the road she'll be making the money and paying for him, but chances are she'll dump him by then and look for a man who makes triple what she does. The entitlement/leech/mooch mentality becomes part of a woman's self esteem, and she won't give that up easily.
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 (edited) I thought Mr. Well Endowed wasn't showing up for another month? Also thought you had no money, and that's why he was coming to see you. You couldn't afford to go to him, so you had to wait six weeks for him to visit. Must be quite the Skype sessions if two weeks later you are this focused on marrying him and making sure he pays! Why not find out if he physically matches the dildos you bought before arguing over money, Mr. Maneater? You only have to wait another month for that...well unless you won the lottery in the last week. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/sexual-reproductive-health-practices/367892-he-worth Edited February 3, 2013 by Cutiepie1976 1
StanMusial Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 I thought Mr. Well Endowed wasn't showing up for another month? Also thought you had no money, and that's why he was coming to see you. You couldn't afford to go to him, so you had to wait six weeks for him to visit. Must be quite the Skype sessions if two weeks later you are this focused on marrying him and making sure he pays! Why not find out if he physically matches the dildos you bought before arguing over money, Mr. Maneater? You only have to wait another month for that...well unless you won the lottery in the last week. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/sexual-reproductive-health-practices/367892-he-worth Bahahahahahahahahahaha Yeah I think its a legitimate topic but not a real scenario. The other thread cracked me up.
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 Maneater has had a few hilarious threads!
FitChick Posted February 3, 2013 Posted February 3, 2013 I haven't read the whole thread but I'm sure it's been mentioned before: While still single, figure out the difference between the two incomes and each one will pay a percentage of expenses based on that. If you make twice as much, you pay twice as much, for example. You can renegotiate as that changes over time. Legally you are just roommates. When you are married, the money you both make, regardless who makes what, belongs to both of you. There is no "hers" or "his" -- it's "ours." 1
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 I thought Mr. Well Endowed wasn't showing up for another month? Also thought you had no money, and that's why he was coming to see you. You couldn't afford to go to him, so you had to wait six weeks for him to visit. Must be quite the Skype sessions if two weeks later you are this focused on marrying him and making sure he pays! Why not find out if he physically matches the dildos you bought before arguing over money, Mr. Maneater? You only have to wait another month for that...well unless you won the lottery in the last week. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/sexual-reproductive-health-practices/367892-he-worth I never said he was well endowed. Hahah he just has more than I do at the present moment. I can still pay my own bills and live in a very nice condo. My idea of broke is clearly different from you. Yes we have been talking everyday for 4-6 hours. We have a lot of serious discussions as well as getting to know each other. We probably know each other better than most people dating for 6 months since we are taking the time to discuss so much. We'll see, doesn't mean I'm marrying the guy. This is just a topic that we considered since at some point one of us is going to have to move. You seem more caught up in my check book than answering the simple question don't worry about me, I will be making far more than he does.
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 Ummm...aren't "gold diggers" (which you men here just LOVE to label any woman who breathes) supposed to aim HIGHER than themselves? She already SAID she's going to make TRIPLE this guy's salary in a few years. Maybe HE'S the gold digger. And one last thought - it's always the ones with the least amount of 'gold' to dig that constantly use this overused term. Yes he seems slightly unmotivated in his job. He's not the type that would go after my money but since I would want to take nice vacations he'd probably refuse to go even if I'd pay for entire trip bc he's too proud that he can't afford it.
Author Maneater Posted February 3, 2013 Author Posted February 3, 2013 I thought Mr. Well Endowed wasn't showing up for another month? Also thought you had no money, and that's why he was coming to see you. You couldn't afford to go to him, so you had to wait six weeks for him to visit. Must be quite the Skype sessions if two weeks later you are this focused on marrying him and making sure he pays! Why not find out if he physically matches the dildos you bought before arguing over money, Mr. Maneater? You only have to wait another month for that...well unless you won the lottery in the last week. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/sexual-reproductive-health-practices/367892-he-worth You're funny! When I said well endowed, I was referring to his penis size not his checkbook!!! Looks like someone read what they wanted to read. You desperately want to think I'm a gold digger when I'm not I won't even mention your screen name- 1976. I'm under 30 by the way.
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