Shadowwed Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 So the deal is I invited this girl that i work with to a show at bar. that was last October. At first I didnt think much of her but for some some reason I looked at her one day and just liked her. So i basically started to make my presence known. Which led up to me asking her to the show. When I asked her she gave me a very enthusiastic yes. So I thought that was a good sign. That first night out we had a really good time. when we left the bar i put my arm around her and she wrapped her arm around my waist. i figured this is goin good. i took her home and said goodnite. no kiss or anything i figured id save the kiss for the next time i invited her for drinks a week later. we had a good time talking, playing pool. i got a little brave and started to get close and put my arms around her waist. We ended up makin out in my car for about 2 hours. We ended up goin to happy hour a couple of times and same thing happened ended up makin out. Really enjoying ourselves. One thing though, she told me she had recently broken up with her boyfriend . she said she had known him for about 7 years but was with him the last 2 years. She said she left him because he was to much into drugs and was a drag on her emotionally and financially. He wasn’t very responsible so she dumped him. That should have been a red flag for me, but I was into her. She mentioned to me that she shouldn’t talk about her ex while she’s hanging out with me. I told her It is what it is, but I changed the subject . So I start to really like this girl. At one point she tells me she’s not ready for something serious. And I tell her its cool. We can take it slow. And we leave it at that. This a month into us “hangin out”. On the night before she goes on a road trip with her family we talk and make out till 3am . the next day i feel really sad that’s she’ll be away for 2 weeks and I tell her this and that we should stop what we’re doing if its not going anywhere. I tell her That the 2 weeks shes gone will be good for me to try and forget her. If I can. Long story short it doesn’t work because we text each other every day that she is away. At one point I text her that this is too much for me. And if nothing is gonna happen I don’t want to waste my time. She tells me that she thinks im playing games with her and im making her cry. So I just tell her that I don’t mean to and that we’ll see what happens when she gets back. Though she cant stop texting me so I just go along with it. Though it seems that the more we distance ourselves the more we like each other. So she gets back and we pick up where we left off. Its awesome, we get along really well. The first day we have off I invite her to breakfast and we spend the whole day together. Feels like we’re a couple. Next couple of weeks I would pick her up to go to work. The first time I picked her up she leans in to kiss me. I think its odd because according to her we’re friends . but it seems we’re couple. I don’t immediately kiss her when she leans in. she gets this awkward, embarrassed look on her face for a moment. So I just kiss her anyway. So around Christmas she starts to grow a little cold. So I just start to back off. At one point I text her and she doesn’t get back to me as consistently like before. So I just go about my day. later I ask her why the cold shoulder? She says she isn’t doin that. I let her know if its your way of ending what we’re doin I have no problem with it. she tells me that I should have listened to her when she said she wasn’t ready for anything serious. She asks me if we can still be friends and I tell her I thought we were just friends. But that I really like her and I thought she liked me too. By the way she said she did like me on a couple of occasions. Anyway, so I back off. Its awkward at work. I don’t talk to her she doesn’t talk to me, Just “hellos” and “goodbyes”. This goes on for about 2 or 3 weeks. I would catch her looking at me and averting her eyes when I would catch her. So recently she started coming over to my desk and asking how im doing, small talk. I tell her im fine. Then she starts coming up behind me and playfully “booing” me to scare me. Which is what I did when I started liking her. So one day I see her walking to the bus stop after work so I say “what the hell” ill give her a ride home. So very smoothly I pull up next to her and tell her to "get in, I’ll take you home”. We just make small talk. About new years resolutions and stuff. She tells me about this rolling stone magazine she has a t work with good articles and if I want to borrow the next day. so the next day I ask her for the mag at work. She tells me someone else has it. I tell her cool, Ill look for it. But before I walk away she pinches my nipple! I get really thrown off by this. She used to do this when we were messing around at random times. Which I didn’t mind. But now it left me wondering what is up with her. So recently she coming up to me and grabs my sides, tickles me or just puts her hands on me every chance she gets. At one point she put her hands on my neck so I could feel how cold they were. Or she’ll show me funny videos or pics on her ipad. Did I mention she has a killer sense of humor? Anyway ive caught her fixing her hair when I approach her and even when Im talking to her now. The first couple of times I gave her a ride home her body language was very guarded and stiff, but recently she seems more loose and comfortable. Almost like shes leaning towards me. Seems like she was very comfortable riding in my car. Sorry for the long story. But im wondering if shes flirting with me or is this her way of being friendly towards me? Ive asked a couple of female friends and the consensus is she might want to start something again. Im willing to give it another shot. But I don’t want to end up with egg on my face again. Myself I haven’t been in a relationship in 3 years. Since my break up with an ex girlfriend of 5 years. Yes it took me that long to get over her and let someone in. which is this girl. I haven’t acted on her behavior. Im playing it cool for now, but im wondering how to go about it without scarring her away. Its obvious we both know how it feels to be with each other. But is it worth the heart ache. Since I worked hard to put her out of my mind. Thanks for reading. Cheers!
ja123 Posted February 5, 2013 Posted February 5, 2013 1- she told me she had recently broken up with her boyfriend. 2- she tells me she’s not ready for something serious. 3- we should stop what we’re doing if its not going anywhere. 4- Im willing to give it another shot. 5- But is it worth the heart ache [?] I think you would have got more responses if your post were shorter, and you had you used paragraphs; otherwise, it's very hard to read. I've tried to point out the essentials to your post. Therein, I think you have your answer. She's blowing hot and cold because although she likes you, she's not ready for anything serious. If you want something serious now, then you'll have to move on before you invest more emotions, and find someone else. Good Luck! 1
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