jazze Posted February 2, 2013 Share Posted February 2, 2013 Hi everyone, a few days ago I wrote about my LDR bf who haven't contacted me for almost 3 weeks. Last night, I took the courage to send him an sms. My sms was just telling him that I was worried because I didn't hear from him for so long and that his silence made me think he doesn't want me to contact him anymore. I also apologized for whatever mistakes I have made and that I regretted all of them. I ended the sms wishing him doing fine and happy as I am now. Indirectly, I was like saying goodbye to him in a subtle way. I didn't expect a response but he responded after an hour. He was sorry for not contacting me because he was very busy and facing some problems but everything is fine now. He asked how I was doing, about my forthcoming trip and who I was going with. Since the message sending was a bit slow, I asked him to call but he said the signal was weak. So we sms back and forth for about half an hour before I ended it. The strangest thing was that I felt like I was talking to a friend. We used to call each other sweetheart even in sms and always end with a "I love u", but last night's text, it was so casual, it was like he was just a friend to me. I tried to talk the usual way but he just reply in a very friendly way. I feel like he just want to be friend with me now. I don't know if I should ask him further about our relationship the next time we get in touch. Please advice. Link to post Share on other sites
ana0pera Posted February 2, 2013 Share Posted February 2, 2013 hi Jazze, what do YOU want with regards to him? do you still want a relationship, or are you done with him? you need to have an honest and upfront talk about your relationship status, or else make a clean break. you've done all that i think you can do so it might just be best for you to go NC, you did reach out to him afterall. there is no point skirting around the issue through texts, he needs to be brave enough to end it with you if that's what he wants, or smart enough to tell you that he wants to be with you, and if both of those fail, than you need to finish taking matters in your own hands and end it. i am sorry that you're going through this, i just had pretty much the same thing happen to me. when my bf finally got back in touch we talked about this issue immediately to resolve it. i think that if you are going to start healing, no matter what the discussion ends up being about, you need to have that discussion. good luck! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazze Posted February 2, 2013 Author Share Posted February 2, 2013 hi Jazze, what do YOU want with regards to him? do you still want a relationship, or are you done with him? you need to have an honest and upfront talk about your relationship status, or else make a clean break. you've done all that i think you can do so it might just be best for you to go NC, you did reach out to him afterall. there is no point skirting around the issue through texts, he needs to be brave enough to end it with you if that's what he wants, or smart enough to tell you that he wants to be with you, and if both of those fail, than you need to finish taking matters in your own hands and end it. i am sorry that you're going through this, i just had pretty much the same thing happen to me. when my bf finally got back in touch we talked about this issue immediately to resolve it. i think that if you are going to start healing, no matter what the discussion ends up being about, you need to have that discussion. good luck! Hi anaOpera, thanks for your reply. Honestly, I don't know what I want from him. I was just relieved he responded to me last night after a long time. The fact is I have been asking him about our relationship every time I can't get hold of him. Each time he gave me reassurance and very positive about the relationship. The strange feelings I have right now is that I don't really missed him. When he was in NC with me, I think I have become stronger emotionally. The anger and frustration of being ignored by him for so long made me invulnerable. I think I want to go NC for the longest time I can go until I finally get over him and want nothing to do with him. Link to post Share on other sites
allenpo123 Posted February 2, 2013 Share Posted February 2, 2013 Hi anaOpera, thanks for your reply. Honestly, I don't know what I want from him. I was just relieved he responded to me last night after a long time. The fact is I have been asking him about our relationship every time I can't get hold of him. Each time he gave me reassurance and very positive about the relationship. The strange feelings I have right now is that I don't really missed him. When he was in NC with me, I think I have become stronger emotionally. The anger and frustration of being ignored by him for so long made me invulnerable. I think I want to go NC for the longest time I can go until I finally get over him and want nothing to do with him. Good for you!!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted February 2, 2013 Share Posted February 2, 2013 If he didn't contact you for 3 weeks in an LDR, it sure does sound like it's over. I'm glad that it has somehow made you stronger in facing this reality. It's best that you move on because if he had any interest in maintaining the relationship at all, you would've heard from him before this. Move on, girl. Good luck. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazze Posted February 2, 2013 Author Share Posted February 2, 2013 If he didn't contact you for 3 weeks in an LDR, it sure does sound like it's over. I'm glad that it has somehow made you stronger in facing this reality. It's best that you move on because if he had any interest in maintaining the relationship at all, you would've heard from him before this. Move on, girl. Good luck. Thank you ladyabstrused... Link to post Share on other sites
Birdnest Posted February 3, 2013 Share Posted February 3, 2013 hi Jazze, If someone ignores you for three weeks, move on....NEXT...that is obvious he doesn't need a relationship in his life. What makes men tick? They seem to pursue, and when they catch, they start to ignore.... I think that is the million dollar question we all ask...Personally I am dating someone who lives an hour from me, works all the time, and is starting to do the ignoring thing....however, I will see him tomorrow, and we will have a little chat about this....I won't tolerate someone ignoring me for long, that's for sure! I don't care how busy you are...if you can't even answer a text message....something is wrong.... Take care! Bird PS - Did your guy ignore your text messages too? Where does he live? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazze Posted February 5, 2013 Author Share Posted February 5, 2013 hi Jazze, If someone ignores you for three weeks, move on....NEXT...that is obvious he doesn't need a relationship in his life. What makes men tick? They seem to pursue, and when they catch, they start to ignore.... I think that is the million dollar question we all ask...Personally I am dating someone who lives an hour from me, works all the time, and is starting to do the ignoring thing....however, I will see him tomorrow, and we will have a little chat about this....I won't tolerate someone ignoring me for long, that's for sure! I don't care how busy you are...if you can't even answer a text message....something is wrong.... Take care! Bird PS - Did your guy ignore your text messages too? Where does he live? Hi there Birdnest thanks for your reply. Well, he started to reply my text messages the 'normal' way like the old times. At this point, I feel like I can go without him contacting me. I think I am in the healing stage..He lives very far away from me.. Link to post Share on other sites
Birdnest Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 When someone drops the I love you's and doesnt return phone calls and texts...time to move on! How are you doing Jazze? Anything better? Did you go to NC and see him? Anyway good luck...here is a book you should read: (in preparation for NEXT one): how to make someone fall in love with you in 90 minutes ... the title is terrible, but the book is great! Link to post Share on other sites
Author jazze Posted February 6, 2013 Author Share Posted February 6, 2013 When someone drops the I love you's and doesnt return phone calls and texts...time to move on! How are you doing Jazze? Anything better? Did you go to NC and see him? Anyway good luck...here is a book you should read: (in preparation for NEXT one): how to make someone fall in love with you in 90 minutes ... the title is terrible, but the book is great! Hi Birdnest Im in NC but with no intention to get him back. I don't plan to see or contact him anymore. He just let me hanging here wondering is it over or just need space. I think he took the coward way or not the gentleman way of ending the relationship. I think by doing the NC, it will be of a benefit to my mental and emotionally health. It is not an easy road to walk but I am certain I get to where I want to go sooner or later. My guts feeling say he is seeing someone else. If that is the case, good luck to his next conquest! By the way, thanks for the suggested book. I will try to search for it soon. Link to post Share on other sites
umirano Posted February 22, 2013 Share Posted February 22, 2013 What makes men tick? They seem to pursue, and when they catch, they start to ignore... So you think this is a man thing? Meet my gf. I broke up with her without calling her when she thought it's a good idea to stop talking to me. She came around hard, virtually on her knees. I took her back. So far so good, but I'll remain vigilant. In any case, no one has to take ****. So put your foot down. Link to post Share on other sites
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