CFJ87 Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 (edited) Two months ago I met this girl on a plane and we had a really good chat. She gave me her number and I offered her a ride back, but then she politely declined. So I said see you when I next see you and parted ways. 5 minutes later I get a miss call from her and though she might not have said it, it sounded like she wanted a ride but then changed her mind. I decided not to force the issue but asked if she was positive. I then text her about once a week asking her about her week etc. It sounded like she was really cautious. Then a month later, I texted her as she was at the airport waiting to board the plane home. I wished her the usual bon voyage and she said thank you! Five hours later, unexpectedly she texts me "I'm home!!" out of her own initiative. I replied asking her if there was a surprise party but there was no answer. A week later, I wished her good morning and a merry xmas, and asked about her break. No reply. The next text message I would send was to wish everyone a happy new year. No reply. Last week, I texted her asking if she was back in town. No reply. I called her and her phone was turned on. She didn't pick up. So in any case, I texted her asking if she would like to watch the fireworks/parade with me the following week. She replied saying it sounds like fun but shes already booked that weekend because she would be going skiing. Then I asked her what time her skiing would be and she said that it would be on Friday. She also promised to meet her friends for a movie on Saturday, and that she had to be up early on Sunday. Then she asked me when the fireworks were, when I had already said it was on a Saturday. So I decided to ask when she would be free for me to buy her lunch and catch up with her personally. No reply. The next day I decide to text her apologizing if I ever across too strong. And that I hated knowing people through text messages because people always misintepret things. I asked her to let me know what she thinks. She replies apologizing for the late reply. She then went on to say that she is SORT OF seeing someone right now? And that she wouldn't know what he would think if she went out with a guy who she just knew on a plane. I said "who cares if you're seeing someone" and that I only wanted to be her friend. And get to know her because she seems awesome. Then she says that she would love to have coffee, like I suggested. And we can hang out the next weekend, because she is booked this weekend. And said that our mutual friend, whom we talked about on the plane should also come along. I said that the following week would work for me and that I would speak to my friend first. Before I even spoke to my friend - she had already sent a message to my friend through facebook to invite him. Since two days ago when all this occured, she seems really distant. This morning I text her wishing her all the best at her race. She says thanks! And so I say btw, I spoke with my friend yesterday and he says hes free etc. No reply. She calls me though, and says "Sorry my phone called you by accident". I reply "No problem. Have you raced btw?" No reply. Its been hell for me and I hope to get advise from the community here! I do like her - and I do think she is awesome. I'm rationalizing that she just doesn't trust me at the moment? But I'm not sure.. especially since shes mentioned that shes sort of seeing someone. This is killing me. Thanks Edited February 2, 2013 by CFJ87
TaraMaiden Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 she is SORT OF seeing someone right now? And that she wouldn't know what he would think if she went out with a guy who she just knew on a plane. I said "who cares if you're seeing someone" and that I only wanted to be her friend. And get to know her because she seems awesome. Its been hell for me and I hope to get advise from the community here! I do like her - and I do think she is awesome. I'm rationalizing that she just doesn't trust me at the moment? But I'm not sure.. especially since shes mentioned that shes sort of seeing someone. This is killing me. Why would this be 'killing you'? All you want to do is have her as a friend, right? Unless, of course, you lied to her, in the hope of keeping her in the picture, and staying on her radar.... Why don't you just be honest? You want to date her, and the reason you want to see her is if you can actually move this forward. But someone else might be involved. You're treading on 'private property' and even if she's only 'sort of' seeing someone else - there's still 'someone else' on the scene. If I were she, you'd seriously be pissing me off right now Why do you think she took the initiative to contact your friend on FB? Because she wants a chaperone, and to not give you the opportunity of coming on to her. She didn't want to leave the arrangements to you ("Yeah, I tried to contact my friend, but he couldn't make it") so she made sure he would. You need to get the hint: you need to seriously back off. To me, you sound desperate. not to mention dishonest. . 2
chrisftw Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 you came on WAY to clingy. why did you send her so many text even though she didn't reply? i think after about the third text and no reply that should have been your hint. then she's seeing somebody or so she says. and you still press her with the guise of lets be friends. ON TOP OF THAT she wanted somebody else to be present with you two. and you want to know why she seems distant? you stand zero chance with this one. honestly. its painfully obvious.
rushingwaters Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Sorry but she's not interested in you. So I decided to ask when she would be free for me to buy her lunch and catch up with her personally. No reply. This should have given you an answer. If she had any interest in you, even as friends (or as a backup to her current guy), she would have replied. She's ignoring you on purpose. Stop sending her so many text messages. The more you send, the more annoying and desperate you come across. She then went on to say that she is SORT OF seeing someone right now? And that she wouldn't know what he would think if she went out with a guy who she just knew on a plane. She's not in a relationship but she likes this guy. She cares about what he thinks. And she wants to be with him, not you. I said that the following week would work for me and that I would speak to my friend first. Before I even spoke to my friend - she had already sent a message to my friend through facebook to invite him. She doesn't trust you. You can say it's a platonic meetup but it may not turn out to be that way. Hence, the need for the mutual friend. In her mind, she probably thinks you'll "forget" to invite your friend so she took care of that potential problem. This is how far ahead into the future she is thinking. She might have initially been interested in you. But that did not last long. And it probably won't return. Sorry. 1
Cutiepie1976 Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 Unfortunately for you, she is not interested. That becomes clear by the time you have the non-responses to the "Good Morning" and "Merry Xmas" texts. Kudos for trying though. It's the only way to find a girlfriend. Understandably, not every attempt will work out. It's just life. Refocus and spend time trying with someone else. Another girl will think you are just awesome! You just have to look again. 1
bob the brave Posted February 2, 2013 Posted February 2, 2013 I can feel ya bro, but you should have moved on at the 5th 'no reply'. . She then went on to say that she is SORT OF seeing someone right now? And that she wouldn't know what he would think if she went out with a guy who she just knew on a plane. ...yet she gives you her number? She is saving you as plan B, C, D, whatever or she is just toying with you because she likes the added attention. Either way, no matter how awesome she is, she is a manipulating, selfish chicka. Add her to your blocked list.
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