flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 Today I asked a girl out and asked her if she is available on Saturday. She said is she busy studying. I'm wondering, this is first week of school and there aren't many homework to do, if at all. She is the kind of girl that studies a lot though. Last month I took her out to a lunch just to hangout. I asked her where did her boyfriend go to school since she said it on her introduction speech. She told me it was a joke, then she asked me how many girlfriend I had. If she's not interested in me she wouldn't ask. Is she really interested in me, but legitimately busy, or did she reject me?
KungFuJoe Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 Let me consult my Magic Eight Ball. The answer is........perhaps. 1
Mycteria Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 She rejected you unless she offered an alternative date. Ball is in her court. 1
DrStrangelove Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 she is. she wouldn't have posed the question about your last loves. patience, girls want what they cant have
Author flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 she is. she wouldn't have posed the question about your last loves. patience, girls want what they cant have Do you think there is a possibility that she is just asking because we are friends? As in friendzone?
Imajerk17 Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 I love how nice everyone is to this kid. I sure wish back when I was 18 that I had the internet to make snide comments at me when I was learning to date. Anyway OP: I do agree with the others. Sounds to me that she isn't interested and she doesn't have it in her to say no to you outright. If she were she would offer an alternative time. I don't care how inexperienced she is, a college-age girl won't let things come between her and a guy she was interested in. 1
KungFuJoe Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 I love how nice everyone is to this kid. I sure wish back when I was 18 that I had the internet to make snide comments at me when I was learning to date. Anyway OP: I do agree with the others. Sounds to me that she isn't interested and she doesn't have it in her to say no to you outright. If she were she would offer an alternative time. I don't care how inexperienced she is, a college-age girl won't let things come between her and a guy she was interested in. You want my honest answer? All this google and internet forums with people asking about how to interact with others...it does NO good. None. It just causes you to overthink and overanalyze and creates additional stress. When I was dating, there was no texting, not much in terms of online forums, and NO google. You had to get out and experience life, **** up on your own, and figure it out for yourself. And it didn't seem like quantum physics the way it's portrayed around here.
Author flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 I love how nice everyone is to this kid. I sure wish back when I was 18 that I had the internet to make snide comments at me when I was learning to date. Anyway OP: I do agree with the others. Sounds to me that she isn't interested and she doesn't have it in her to say no to you outright. If she were she would offer an alternative time. I don't care how inexperienced she is, a college-age girl won't let things come between her and a guy she was interested in. She didn't say "maybe some other day." I think she is playing with me. What's the point of asking me how many girlfriends I had if she is not interested?
Imajerk17 Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 You want my honest answer? All this google and internet forums with people asking about how to interact with others...it does NO good. None. It just causes you to overthink and overanalyze and creates additional stress. When I was dating, there was no texting, not much in terms of online forums, and NO google. You had to get out and experience life, **** up on your own, and figure it out for yourself. And it didn't seem like quantum physics the way it's portrayed around here. And yet we're both here...
todreaminblue Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 Today I asked a girl out and asked her if she is available on Saturday. She said is she busy studying. I'm wondering, this is first week of school and there aren't many homework to do, if at all. She is the kind of girl that studies a lot though. Last month I took her out to a lunch just to hangout. I asked her where did her boyfriend go to school since she said it on her introduction speech. She told me it was a joke, then she asked me how many girlfriend I had. If she's not interested in me she wouldn't ask. Is she really interested in me, but legitimately busy, or did she reject me? No body can tell you on here what she is doing or has done in as far as rejection goes,, but she could have been legitimately planning on studying when you took her out for lunch the last time, did she seem to have a good time did you have some laughs was it easy to talk to her?
MidwestUSA Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 Let's not assume too much. Perhaps she is shy, and the "ball in her court" isn't comfortable. Or she wasn't quick enough to offer an alternative. How many times has anyone here thought of what they should have said, much later (for me, usually in the middle of the night!) if you really like her, stay in close proximity. Is there anything you can study together? Offer to take her for coffee as a break from studying. Don't read too much into her initial response, the start of school can be nerve- wracking! Good luck!
KungFuJoe Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 And yet we're both here... I'm not single. I'm married and have been for 10 years. I'm here because I have a genuine interest in the human psyche. I like knowing what makes people tick. I like trying to understand how people interact and relationships, love, dating, everything. It's like someone who is long retired from basketball after having a very successful and fruitful career and wants to get into coaching or something like that. I'm not saying I'm here to "coach" or anything...I'm more here to just offer my viewpoint and my examples, which have been very successful, and try to help where I can.
Mycteria Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 I don't think this forum helps guys get dates or learn how to interact with women. That comes from experience. What I think this forum does do (or it has for me at least) is show people the patterns in relationships that can potentially end up ruining a good relationship. (Affairs, affair fogs, gaslighting, GIGS, etc). The reality is that yes, every person is unique, but we are all human and call all fall into these same patterns. It helps to be aware of them so you can recognize them in yourself and your partner and avoid them at all costs or learn to rectify them. So this forum is great for learning "relationship maintenance." But not so great for teaching socially awkward guys how to get women. 2
KungFuJoe Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 To be honest, I find myself mostly bashing stereotypes. "Women only want bad boys" "Men only care about looks" "Women only care about looks" "Men have it harder than women" etc, etc. Most of those stereotypes have SOME truth behind them, but taken at absolute face value...they are complete BS. For instance...men and women care about looks, yes...but it's not ALL they care about. Women like a man with an edge, because he emits strength and excitement...but they don't want some dude that goes around beating people up, committing crimes, lying, cheating, etc. Anyways...I guess I derailed the topic enough.
Author flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 No body can tell you on here what she is doing or has done in as far as rejection goes,, but she could have been legitimately planning on studying when you took her out for lunch the last time, did she seem to have a good time did you have some laughs was it easy to talk to her? The morning before I took her out for lunch, she told me she was at my dorm studying. I asked her if she ever been to dining commons and I need to use up my points before end of semester. That afternoon she texted me and asked if if she could eat at the dining commons. I took her there and when we got our lunch, she sat diagonally. I was surprised how she didn't sit in front of me. I don't remember if we had some laugh, but we had good conversation. That Friday it was her birthday. I asked her, "Since its your birthday I would to take you out to dinner. I understand you might want to spend time with your family or friends, how about Saturday?" She laughed and said "Sure. I might do something with my friends. I'll let you know." The following night I texted her if she is still up for her birthday. She told me she had to study for finals and maybe dinner for next weekend. I couldn't do it because I have to go back home on Friday. She said she'll think about if she can make it before Friday and if not "oh well." However the following Tuesday, she called me if I could buy her a pizza at the university market, so I can use up my points. After we got the pizza, I asked her if she want to eat at the university union. She told me we should eat at the lounge instead. I wasn't sure if we are allow to eat there, so we ended up eating at my room with my roommates
todreaminblue Posted January 31, 2013 Posted January 31, 2013 The morning before I took her out for lunch, she told me she was at my dorm studying. I asked her if she ever been to dining commons and I need to use up my points before end of semester. That afternoon she texted me and asked if if she could eat at the dining commons. I took her there and when we got our lunch, she sat diagonally. I was surprised how she didn't sit in front of me. I don't remember if we had some laugh, but we had good conversation. That Friday it was her birthday. I asked her, "Since its your birthday I would to take you out to dinner. I understand you might want to spend time with your family or friends, how about Saturday?" She laughed and said "Sure. I might do something with my friends. I'll let you know." The following night I texted her if she is still up for her birthday. She told me she had to study for finals and maybe dinner for next weekend. I couldn't do it because I have to go back home on Friday. She said she'll think about if she can make it before Friday and if not "oh well." However the following Tuesday, she called me if I could buy her a pizza at the university market, so I can use up my points. After we got the pizza, I asked her if she want to eat at the university union. She told me we should eat at the lounge instead. I wasn't sure if we are allow to eat there, so we ended up eating at my room with my roommates so she has eaten with you a couple of times,take the initiative, set up another date with her, this time ask her when she might be free to go for dinner or ask her if sh emight have a night free soon, and would she like to choose a place fto go for dinner, say you understand she is busy but you are willing to work around when she has soem time spare,then see what the response is.........she sounds interested to me ....good luck.....deb
Author flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 Let's not assume too much. Perhaps she is shy, and the "ball in her court" isn't comfortable. Or she wasn't quick enough to offer an alternative. How many times has anyone here thought of what they should have said, much later (for me, usually in the middle of the night!) if you really like her, stay in close proximity. Is there anything you can study together? Offer to take her for coffee as a break from studying. Don't read too much into her initial response, the start of school can be nerve- wracking! Good luck! Do you think the reason she said what she said because it is first week of school and people are really "busy?"
Author flashx80 Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 so she has eaten with you a couple of times,take the initiative, set up another date with her, this time ask her when she might be free to go for dinner or ask her if sh emight have a night free soon, and would she like to choose a place fto go for dinner, say you understand she is busy but you are willing to work around when she has soem time spare,then see what the response is.........she sounds interested to me ....good luck.....deb It wasn't a date. It was a hangout the couple times eat ate together. I think I asked her too early especially when it's first week of school and everyone is busy. I just want to get a first date before Valentine's Day and second date on Valentine's Day
Author flashx80 Posted February 1, 2013 Author Posted February 1, 2013 What do you guys think? Do you think I asked her too early and she is really busy because it is first week of school? Or is she not interested? Should I ask her again in a few weeks?
sid3 Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 What do you guys think? Do you think I asked her too early and she is really busy because it is first week of school? Or is she not interested? Should I ask her again in a few weeks? I think she's not interested. If she was, you wouldn't be here asking.
mortensorchid Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 She's not interested enough in you to continue things. She may say to others "I like him", but, in typical 8th grade style, she doesn't like you like you. I'd let it go.
pbjbear Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 Nope, she doesnt sound interested from what you posted If a girl turns you down and doesnt offer to reschedule or do something else to make up for it, theyre usually not interested
Author flashx80 Posted February 1, 2013 Author Posted February 1, 2013 Nope, she doesnt sound interested from what you posted If a girl turns you down and doesnt offer to reschedule or do something else to make up for it, theyre usually not interested If you read my post above about her birthday dinner last month, she did make up for it. Today she didn't mention about rescheduling. So I'm confused if she's interested or not
Samilia Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 Are we still on this thread? If she hasn't made the effort to reschedule by now, move on. Get someone who wants you!
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