Sadmisselle Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Yes, I am counting the hours. I am that pathetic. Monday he talked to me, "apologized" injust a way... told me "this is the most respect you'll ever get out of me again." Yesterday my dumb a** thought talking to him was a good idea. He apparently unblocked me because he responded right away. "I know you didn't deserve any of this. I just want you to hate me so I can stop hurting you. I haven't eaten since Thursday. I feel like giving up." And then I say something and he blocks me again. Seriously? I KNOW i shouldn't talk to him. I know that yet I cannot let him go. It's been6a days since the breakup. 4 days since I found out he had slept with some other girl... but I am getting worse . Why do i care that he feels like giving up? Why am i worried about how he is at all? I think i just enjoy this pain or something because this is not normal. I am not going to try talking to him again. But he ALWAYS comes back. And I don't know what I am more afraid of. Him coming back and my reaction to it... or him not coming back at all? Clearly, i am pathetic.
Own Worst Enemy Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You just love him. And that takes time to unroot itself and for you to heal the pain of detaching. We're all going through the same thing. That is a helpful thought when not much else is x 1
Author Sadmisselle Posted January 31, 2013 Author Posted January 31, 2013 You just love him. And that takes time to unroot itself and for you to heal the pain of detaching. We're all going through the same thing. That is a helpful thought when not much else is x Well I want it to end now. I WANT to feel normal now. Apparently in my chemically induced sleep state last night I thought messaging him I miss you was appropriate. Obviously not since I got no reply and then heard about it from his best friend. I'm not doing well at all. I can't sleep. I never eat. I lay in bed and cry. That is my life now and i absolutely hate who i am becoming.
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