Author babycrapgreen Posted December 11, 2015 Author Posted December 11, 2015 Although I can't say for certain, it is possible that Sam was most attracted by your unavailability. I think you might be more certain if I told you his best friend's girlfriend broke up with his friend for him in the midst while attempting to re-communicate with me. Just interesting, right? But, those thoughts have gone through my mind as well.
Redhead14 Posted December 11, 2015 Posted December 11, 2015 This is rather a long story and complicated, I'll try to simplify it as much as possible. I met Sam through a mutual friend about 8 years ago, I had a boyfriend then that I had been with for 4 years. So, Sam and I started carpooling and we became really close friends, completely platonic and he eventually started liking me, he expressed his feelings for me and I declined, ofcourse, I didn't want to leave anyone for someone else. He completely stopped talking to me, I was hurt, but, I understood why. I gradually saw him less and less because I was starting my career and growing up, but, he never left my thoughts. Even at parties, we wouldn't really interact with each other, it's like we hardly knew each other. I would get random emails and texts from Sam, for which I would reply with no return. I kept an email he wrote me in 2010, he had a girlfriend then, and I didn't want disrespect that, so I never replied. And by then I was engaged. My fiance isn't the most perfect man, he's attempted to cheat on me, flirted friends, but, he's been there and declares he's in love with me. Occurences of which happened more than once. I don't want to digress. Just a brief background on my fiance. So, I finally replied to the 2010 email that Sam wrote me, just to say hello. He gave me his number and we texted each other daily. He was aware of my engagement. We hung-out multiple times, it was like we never left each other. Once again, completely platonic. We had several serious conversations of what happened to us over the yearsthis past December, how we never really forgot each other and how if we ever did get together it would've worked out. But, I noticed recently, Sam been distancing himself from me. In fact, I broke off my engagement and broke up with my boyfriend, and Sam hasn't contacted me. I don't know what to think. I would really appreciate any advice. Was Sam aware that you were breaking up with fiance? I'd say he's kept contact with you over the years for the "attention" and kinda was, like you wondering about how things could have been while not really wanting to or able to. Then, when you told him you were going to be single, he thought you may open that can or worms and it scared him . . . he didn't really want to start something up with you.
Author babycrapgreen Posted February 5, 2016 Author Posted February 5, 2016 Was Sam aware that you were breaking up with fiance? I'd say he's kept contact with you over the years for the "attention" and kinda was, like you wondering about how things could have been while not really wanting to or able to. Then, when you told him you were going to be single, he thought you may open that can or worms and it scared him . . . he didn't really want to start something up with you. I suppose you're right about scaring him. One of my friends mentioned it, but, I was soo happy that we were feeling the same thing all these years. I thought it was adorable...As far as contact, we avoided each other, he would send randoms texts once a year, I would never initiate. Never gave him attention. But, who knows. I think in the end, he was bitter of me rejecting him so long ago. And, now, I'm bitter him rejecting me. We just never had the timing right. We're both spiteful people and very unforgiving...things happen for a reason.
Popsicle Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 This is rather a long story and complicated, I'll try to simplify it as much as possible. I met Sam through a mutual friend about 8 years ago, I had a boyfriend then that I had been with for 4 years. So, Sam and I started carpooling and we became really close friends, completely platonic and he eventually started liking me, he expressed his feelings for me and I declined, ofcourse, I didn't want to leave anyone for someone else. He completely stopped talking to me, I was hurt, but, I understood why. I gradually saw him less and less because I was starting my career and growing up, but, he never left my thoughts. Even at parties, we wouldn't really interact with each other, it's like we hardly knew each other. I would get random emails and texts from Sam, for which I would reply with no return. I kept an email he wrote me in 2010, he had a girlfriend then, and I didn't want disrespect that, so I never replied. And by then I was engaged. My fiance isn't the most perfect man, he's attempted to cheat on me, flirted friends, but, he's been there and declares he's in love with me. Occurences of which happened more than once. I don't want to digress. Just a brief background on my fiance. So, I finally replied to the 2010 email that Sam wrote me, just to say hello. He gave me his number and we texted each other daily. He was aware of my engagement. We hung-out multiple times, it was like we never left each other. Once again, completely platonic. We had several serious conversations of what happened to us over the yearsthis past December, how we never really forgot each other and how if we ever did get together it would've worked out. But, I noticed recently, Sam been distancing himself from me. In fact, I broke off my engagement and broke up with my boyfriend, and Sam hasn't contacted me. I don't know what to think. I would really appreciate any advice. First off, I love your name here. And to address your topic, he most likely was unclear the whole time of knowing you if you were interested in him or not, but now that he knows, he has started to think about whether it's right or not (i.e. if he feels it's going to work for him) and he decided that it's not. 1
Popsicle Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 The other possibility is that he is seeing someone else....
RySant Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 I think you might be more certain if I told you his best friend's girlfriend broke up with his friend for him in the midst while attempting to re-communicate with me. Just interesting, right? But, those thoughts have gone through my mind as well. Nope. Stay away. If he really wants you, he'll make a move right now. Popsicle is right, he might be seeing someone else. And yes, you should be concerned that his bestfriend's GF broke up for him. Sounds like a fisherman to me: Casting his net in the ocean and see the fishes he caught. But the best thing happened is that you broke up with your fiance. Never, ever marry someone who attempted to cheat while you are engaged. Imagine what he'll do once you get married. Yes, be single for now. Better be alone for quite a while and wait for someone who will love you and you alone, rather than choose the guys that you have right now but will not commit to you at all. 1
Author babycrapgreen Posted February 5, 2016 Author Posted February 5, 2016 The other possibility is that he is seeing someone else.... I suspected this. The whole 180 thing coldness. I forgot to mention, he ended up surprising me for my birthday to a nice dinner, I mean like $200-$300 after not communicating with me... which further confused me after not communicating for months. But, I digress, I think it's a little bit of what everyone has mentioned, including yourself to why he reacted the way he did. But, in the end, it was all the same conclusions. "he just not that into me..."..lol!! Thank you, btw, I put a lot of thought on my usernames...hahah!!
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