Farside Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 So I am 32. My bf of 15 years dumped me 3 months ago. I dream about him every night. And every night we get back together in my dreams. It wasn't until talking to my mom today that she realized, my dreams aren't about wanting to really get back together with him. They are about wanting that security back. I HATE change. And for most of my life I have had my bf apart of it. He was my security blanket. About 1.5 months ago I made the list. The list of the good the bad and the ugly. I will only share the bad as its long enough and the good isn't. I know I would NOT go back with him. You be the judge... The Bad *Alcoholic *Cheated on me 3 times *Has gotten 2 DUIs *Uses steriods *Has intimacy issues *Was not there for me when I had major surgery *Was not there when our dog was diagnosed and died of cancer *Never emotionally supported anything I loved *Never complimented me That's all I can remember at the moment from my list. My suggestion to all, make your own list. Maybe those that dumped you weren't all they were cracked up to be. I have a feeling you are better off without them. Thanks for listening and letting me vent!! 1
Ladybugz Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 So I am 32. My bf of 15 years dumped me 3 months ago. I dream about him every night. And every night we get back together in my dreams. It wasn't until talking to my mom today that she realized, my dreams aren't about wanting to really get back together with him. They are about wanting that security back. I HATE change. And for most of my life I have had my bf apart of it. He was my security blanket. About 1.5 months ago I made the list. The list of the good the bad and the ugly. I will only share the bad as its long enough and the good isn't. I know I would NOT go back with him. You be the judge... The Bad *Alcoholic *Cheated on me 3 times *Has gotten 2 DUIs *Uses steriods *Has intimacy issues *Was not there for me when I had major surgery *Was not there when our dog was diagnosed and died of cancer *Never emotionally supported anything I loved *Never complimented me That's all I can remember at the moment from my list. My suggestion to all, make your own list. Maybe those that dumped you weren't all they were cracked up to be. I have a feeling you are better off without them. Thanks for listening and letting me vent!! well............ now that its over i would rather spent my time making a list of who im and my good quality's so i can help my self esteem grow. or a list of fun stuff i will do now that im free of bad bf.s 2
th90 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I wont list anything else but this. This HUGE turn off my ex had. He scratched his balls in front of me. And I had to make sure to have his hands washed before he touched anything else like a mother. I know he did it in my presence (sometimes on purpose just to get me angry (I'm all about hygiene)) because he was very comfortable with me and took me as a part of him. But it was indeed the biggest turn off ever.
amaysngrace Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 well............ now that its over i would rather spent my time making a list of who im and my good quality's so i can help my self esteem grow. or a list of fun stuff i will do now that im free of bad bf.s Exactly. You should be more focused on YOU and who you are since so many things you identified with are wrapped up in him. Did you guys use to do things together that he really loved but you not so much and just went along? Goodbye. His music tastes? Things on TV? Certain bars? Goodbye. Have friends that he didn't like and you've lost touch? Reach out. But mostly recognize the parts of you that molded to adjust to him. If you weren't being true to you and just conformed to meet his needs, know it, honor it, and change it. Get back to you.
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I'd say you dodged a fifty Cal. He doesn't seem worth it. Now make a list of what you want in a man, and find one who fits most the bill.
Chi townD Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Yep! Ladybugz is absolutely right! Time to make your own list, things that you want to make positive changes to in your own life.
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