tkgirl Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Hi all! so there's this guy I met a while back.. a friend of a friend (plays bass in her band) anyho.. he told my friend he'd like to take me out so I gave her my number to give to him... and since then he kind of blew it... very flaky and just doesn't seem to get the concept of how to ask someone out... texts instead of calls, cancelled once at the last minute, or calls and expects me to get together that same night when I've already made other plans. I swore I'd never date a musician again and now I remember why... So we never did go out and now after two weeks with no word from him (I thought he had given up... I know I have!) he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. do I even need to respond? I really have lost interest and just don't want to waste my time trying to expain this to him... any input or advice is appreciated.. thanks!
Green Light Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Hi all! so there's this guy I met a while back.. a friend of a friend (plays bass in her band) anyho.. he told my friend he'd like to take me out so I gave her my number to give to him... and since then he kind of blew it... very flaky and just doesn't seem to get the concept of how to ask someone out... texts instead of calls, cancelled once at the last minute, or calls and expects me to get together that same night when I've already made other plans. I swore I'd never date a musician again and now I remember why... So we never did go out and now after two weeks with no word from him (I thought he had given up... I know I have!) he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. do I even need to respond? I really have lost interest and just don't want to waste my time trying to expain this to him... any input or advice is appreciated.. thanks! If you've lost interest then why even worry about it? If you really do still care even a little bit you could just confront him about it. What is there to lose when you didn't have it in the first place. Nice avatar/picture by the way! That is a terrific album!
superb Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Hi all! so there's this guy I met a while back.. a friend of a friend (plays bass in her band) anyho.. he told my friend he'd like to take me out so I gave her my number to give to him... and since then he kind of blew it... very flaky and just doesn't seem to get the concept of how to ask someone out... texts instead of calls, cancelled once at the last minute, or calls and expects me to get together that same night when I've already made other plans. I swore I'd never date a musician again and now I remember why... So we never did go out and now after two weeks with no word from him (I thought he had given up... I know I have!) he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. do I even need to respond? I really have lost interest and just don't want to waste my time trying to expain this to him... any input or advice is appreciated.. thanks! I wouldnt bother- doesn't sound like he knows what hes doing. 1
Author tkgirl Posted January 30, 2013 Author Posted January 30, 2013 If you've lost interest then why even worry about it? If you really do still care even a little bit you could just confront him about it. What is there to lose when you didn't have it in the first place. Nice avatar/picture by the way! That is a terrific album! it's one of my favorites! but back to the topic... hmmm... I don't think I care but this guy seems so clueless that ignoring him might not work... and at the same time I don't really want to confront him about either because he could take that as I do care... I wouldnt bother- doesn't sound like he knows what hes doing. yeah.. that's what I'm thinking... hopefully he'll get it when I don't respond but I don't know...
D-Lish Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Definitely sounds like he blew it. No explanation needed from your end. Sounds like he's used to women jumping through hoops when he calls.
mortensorchid Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 It's a lost cause. Forget him and move on.
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I hate when men text/call to get together the same night. Like seriously? You think I am waiting around for you to have few hours to fill? I would just ignore.
CC12 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. Why not just respond with a simple "No, thanks." Then ignore him. You don't need to explain anything to him. 1
rocketman122 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Hi all! so there's this guy I met a while back.. a friend of a friend (plays bass in her band) anyho.. he told my friend he'd like to take me out so I gave her my number to give to him... and since then he kind of blew it... very flaky and just doesn't seem to get the concept of how to ask someone out... texts instead of calls, cancelled once at the last minute, or calls and expects me to get together that same night when I've already made other plans. I swore I'd never date a musician again and now I remember why... So we never did go out and now after two weeks with no word from him (I thought he had given up... I know I have!) he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. do I even need to respond? I really have lost interest and just don't want to waste my time trying to expain this to him... any input or advice is appreciated.. thanks! A little boy playing games. just ignore him. dont reply, nothing.
Lani Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Be the better person and give him a 'no thanks' No need to explain it, but I think ignoring any invitation (however annoying it may be) is just rude. If he asks you out again, just tell him it's not going to work and you're not interested. 1
D-Lish Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Be the better person and give him a 'no thanks' No need to explain it, but I think ignoring any invitation (however annoying it may be) is just rude. If he asks you out again, just tell him it's not going to work and you're not interested. I don't think he's owed a "no thanks". He was flippant from the beginning, and I don't think the OP owes him anything.
Lani Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I don't think he's owed a "no thanks". He was flippant from the beginning, and I don't think the OP owes him anything. No, she doesn't owe him anything, I agree with that. It's not about who owes anyone anything though. It's about being a decent person, even when others around you aren't. Treat others as you want to be treated.
D-Lish Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 No, she doesn't owe him anything, I agree with that. It's not about who owes anyone anything though. It's about being a decent person, even when others around you aren't. Treat others as you want to be treated. Maybe if the dude lived by this motto, he'd be out on a date with TK right now, lol. She owes him nothing- and it doesn't make her less decent of a person to ignore someone that didn't show her a whole lot of respect to begin with.
Lani Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Maybe if the dude lived by this motto, he'd be out on a date with TK right now, lol. She owes him nothing- and it doesn't make her less decent of a person to ignore someone that didn't show her a whole lot of respect to begin with. It's not about owing anyone anything. If we all went around only giving people what they were owed, then we'd all be pretty ****ty people. My opinion here is to be the bigger person. Yes he sounds like a total douchebag, and probably doesn't deserve it, but why be childish and just ignore it? We're not 7 years old. A simple 'no thanks' keeps the peace all round. They have mutual friends. It's the decent thing to do.
todreaminblue Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Hi all! so there's this guy I met a while back.. a friend of a friend (plays bass in her band) anyho.. he told my friend he'd like to take me out so I gave her my number to give to him... and since then he kind of blew it... very flaky and just doesn't seem to get the concept of how to ask someone out... texts instead of calls, cancelled once at the last minute, or calls and expects me to get together that same night when I've already made other plans. I swore I'd never date a musician again and now I remember why... So we never did go out and now after two weeks with no word from him (I thought he had given up... I know I have!) he called tonight and left a message that he wants to go out.. do I even need to respond? I really have lost interest and just don't want to waste my time trying to expain this to him... any input or advice is appreciated.. thanks! I dont think an explanation is necessary, but maybe a courtesy text to help him move on...like...... I am not interested in meeting up with you now or in the future, hope you find what you are looking for and best wishes...and your name
Author tkgirl Posted January 30, 2013 Author Posted January 30, 2013 thanks everyone! lots of valid points... so I decided to go with the "no thanks not interested anymore" text and now I can move on... he was flaky from the beginning and not someone I want to waste any more time on. 3
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