Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 This begs the question, if you decide not to have sex with someone who is a virgin, because they are a virgin, how do you expect them to to get the experience? Kind of like applying for credit, when you don't have any. For most people who don't want to deal with virgins the reason is that they get clingy and needy as they have no relationship and sexual experience. No decent human being wants to unleash that unless they are prepared for the consequences and don't mind dealing with them.
animalover Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 For most people who don't want to deal with virgins the reason is that they get clingy and needy as they have no relationship and sexual experience. No decent human being wants to unleash that unless they are prepared for the consequences and don't mind dealing with them. Really... you are disgusted with people who judge others by their sexual past and now you actually post this?? How hypocritical is this??? 3
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Really... you are disgusted with people who judge others by their sexual past and now you actually post this?? How hypocritical is this??? Indeed. This is why, as a virgin myself, I don't want to know someone's sexual history and I don't want them to know mine. What isn't known hurt neither party.
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 For most people who don't want to deal with virgins the reason is that they get clingy and needy as they have no relationship and sexual experience. No decent human being wants to unleash that unless they are prepared for the consequences and don't mind dealing with them. Humans basically suck, OP. Look at this comment. This is the reason why you should lie. You wont get the sexual experience unless someone has sex with you, if you say you are a virgin you wont get that sexual experince. This applies to both men and women btw. My female virgin friends lied about it and they never got clingy with the men they gave it to by the way...people are judgmental and have stereotypes. 1
animalover Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Humans basically suck, OP. Look at this comment. This is the reason why you should lie. You wont get the sexual experience unless someone has sex with you, if you say you are a virgin you wont get that sexual experince. This applies to both men and women btw. My female virgin friends lied about it and they never got clingy with the men they gave it to by the way...people are judgmental and have stereotypes. OP you should never lie! You want people to love you and accept you for who you are and you should settle for no less than that! Women who would treat you bad because you are virgin are the ones you should avoid anyway!
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I'm an older adult virgin and I've had my chances in the past but I have turned them down from one reason to another. I've pretty much done everything else, well not everything since there is some kinky stuff out there but I'm wondering if you don't say anything about being a virgin which I won't will you be able to tell. Perhaps a younger virgin it might be possible but an older male virgin that does know somewhat what to do. I've made girls pretty excited just by kissing them and feeling them. I was so close to doing it but I had way too much anxiety at the time. I mean we were naked in bed together, it doesn't get much closer than that. Basically can I fake not being a virgin? I don't want anyone to know. Until maybe afterwards. Yes. Without a shadow of doubt. She'll never know.
Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Humans basically suck, OP. Look at this comment. This is the reason why you should lie. You wont get the sexual experience unless someone has sex with you, if you say you are a virgin you wont get that sexual experince. so you are saying that people such as myself suck yet you are saying the OP should LIE to people and use them for his sexual gratification? How do you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning? This applies to both men and women btw. My female virgin friends lied about it and they never got clingy with the men they gave it to by the way...people are judgmental and have stereotypes. Really? Your female friends are of course perfect and those that speak from experience are cruel and liars and you know everything in the world and people who disagree with you speak in stereotypes. Correct? Unlike yourself who makes sweeping comments about something that you think applies to 'men and women' even though you clearly have no personal experience of? Do you want to be taken seriously? :confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused:
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Humans basically suck, OP. Look at this comment. This is the reason why you should lie. You wont get the sexual experience unless someone has sex with you, if you say you are a virgin you wont get that sexual experince. This applies to both men and women btw. My female virgin friends lied about it and they never got clingy with the men they gave it to by the way...people are judgmental and have stereotypes. She's not wrong. Imagine this: you break up with your girlfriend. The next day a hot girl shows up wanting to have sex with you. As a guy, sleeping with another woman is a HUGE part of the breaking up process. It's not going to solve everything, but I've noticed that for many men being broken up with is more a blow to the ego than anything else. If you already know there are others, because you have had others, you will not be as clingy. I know, it's a cold, hard, stereotype. And it won't be true for everyone. But a lot of men do work this way.
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 so you are saying that people such as myself suck yet you are saying the OP should LIE to people and use them for his sexual gratification? How do you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning? Really? Your female friends are of course perfect and those that speak from experience are cruel and liars and you know everything in the world and people who disagree with you speak in stereotypes. Correct? Unlike yourself who makes sweeping comments about something that you think applies to 'men and women' even though you clearly have no personal experience of? Do you want to be taken seriously? :confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: If you actually read my comments, I said in an ideal world one would find someone who accepts and loves them and would be okay with them being a virgin. I am realistic. 2 of my female friends both had over 5 guys turn them down once they said they were a virgin. Thats when they started lying. And they didnt go for *******s either. Fact: MOST people seem to think being a virgin is a turnoff. Not me, I would date a virgin, but it seems I am the minority. Most guys think virgin sex is "bad sex" and that the girl will get clingy. YOU stated that. The OP said he wants sexual experience. If you want that, you wont get it by stating the truth. You might, but you will be waiting a loooong time. If you want to do that- wait- then ok. But if you dont want to wait, you will prob. have to lie. Sorry. I wish the world WASNT this way, but it is... Unlike many people on this forum, I am realistic and dont go out in the world and think of things in an ideal way. I respond based on whats around me. Perhaps Im idealistic in my heart but Im more realistic than anything. 1
Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 If you actually read my comments, I said in an ideal world one would find someone who accepts and loves them and would be okay with them being a virgin. I did read your comments. The world is not ideal for anyone and that doesn't give you the licence to lie and trick people into doing anything you want. No excuses for being a user. I am realistic. 2 of my female friends both had over 5 guys turn them down once they said they were a virgin. Thats when they started lying. And they didnt go for *******s either. Fact: MOST people seem to think being a virgin is a turnoff. Not me, I would date a virgin, but it seems I am the minority. Most guys think virgin sex is "bad sex" and that the girl will get clingy. YOU stated that. Yes. Virgins are clingy because they have no sexual and relationship experience and have no understanding of nuances since they never experienced it. Most of us go through this in our teens. Those that are older (and whom we are talking about) are likely to be late developers and/or socially awkward hence the neediness is likely to be even worse. No doubt there are exceptions but virgin sex is pretty bad yes. Once you have done it once or twice you have no desire to do it again. As far as I'm concerned I've done my bit for humanity in my teens when I dated virgin boys. No-one is owed sex. The OP said he wants sexual experience. If you want that, you wont get it by stating the truth. You might, but you will be waiting a loooong time. If you want to do that- wait- then ok. But if you dont want to wait, you will prob. have to lie. Sorry. I wish the world WASNT this way, but it is... He wants sexual experience but he doesn't have the RIGHT to get it. Certainly not by tricking people. Unlike many people on this forum, I am realistic and dont go out in the world and think of things in an ideal way. I respond based on whats around me. Perhaps Im idealistic in my heart but Im more realistic than anything. No, you are cynical and you don't see anything wrong with using people for your own need.
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 He wants sexual experience but he doesn't have the RIGHT to get it. Certainly not by tricking people. Because not telling you're a virgin is kind of like being a rapist? Come on, Emilia, let's not go overboard here. You're not making them do anything they don't want to. 1
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I did read your comments. The world is not ideal for anyone and that doesn't give you the licence to lie and trick people into doing anything you want. No excuses for being a user. Yes. Virgins are clingy because they have no sexual and relationship experience and have no understanding of nuances since they never experienced it. Most of us go through this in our teens. Those that are older (and whom we are talking about) are likely to be late developers and/or socially awkward hence the neediness is likely to be even worse. No doubt there are exceptions but virgin sex is pretty bad yes. Once you have done it once or twice you have no desire to do it again. As far as I'm concerned I've done my bit for humanity in my teens when I dated virgin boys. No-one is owed sex. He wants sexual experience but he doesn't have the RIGHT to get it. Certainly not by tricking people. No, you are cynical and you don't see anything wrong with using people for your own need. If thats true, then why do I know several virgins who did NOT get clingy with the people they lost it to? These people werent teens when they lost it, maybe that is why. They are older and more mature and realize losing it to that one person doesnt make them their everything... If I am cynical its because that is how the world is. You are cynical as well- making over generalizations about people. The way you describe virgins makes you sound like a total bitch
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 If thats true, then why do I know several virgins who did NOT get clingy with the people they lost it to? These people werent teens when they lost it, maybes that way. They are older and more mature and realize losing it to that one person doesnt make them everything. If I am cynical its because that is how the world is. You are cynical as well- making over generalizations about people. You'd think that, but generally these are exactly the kind of people who go all psycho. Let's say one goal has sex, eventually. Then the girl breaks up with him. How is one goal going to react?
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Because not telling you're a virgin is kind of like being a rapist? Come on, Emilia, let's not go overboard here. You're not making them do anything they don't want to. Yeah. She describes virgins as worthless beings and then gets mad when they cant get what they want and lie to have sex. Its really not that big of a deal...people lie about stuff all the time. Itd be nice if people didnt, and werent so goddamn judgmental but it is what it is
Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 Because not telling you're a virgin is kind of like being a rapist? Come on, Emilia, let's not go overboard here. You're not making them do anything they don't want to. You are comparing him to a rapist, not me, let's make that clear. Tricking is not the same as forcing. I do think people should state when they are virgins, yes and to be honest, most would probably struggle to fake it, especially when they are older. I did when I was with my first boyfriend because he had the right to know. It is potentially a big responsibility - more so than when you are in your teens. I would definitely want to know.
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You'd think that, but generally these are exactly the kind of people who go all psycho. Let's say one goal has sex, eventually. Then the girl breaks up with him. How is one goal going to react? You all make over generalizations. I know several older male and female virgins that did not react badly when that person didnt want to see them. Just because one person went psycho on you, doesnt mean everyone else will. These comments reinforce that the OP must lie if he ever wants to have sex! You all are so damn judgmental
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You are comparing him to a rapist, not me, let's make that clear. Tricking is not the same as forcing. I do think people should state when they are virgins, yes and to be honest, most would probably struggle to fake it, especially when they are older. I did when I was with my first boyfriend because he had the right to know. It is potentially a big responsibility - more so than when you are in your teens. I would definitely want to know. I faked it. And hell, I aced my exam! Nah, not really, I kind of sucked. Then again I was younger, she probably knew I was a virgin anyway. I just don't think it's tricking them into having sex. They want to have sex. Not telling them you're a virgin is not like not telling them about STD's.
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You are comparing him to a rapist, not me, let's make that clear. Tricking is not the same as forcing. I do think people should state when they are virgins, yes and to be honest, most would probably struggle to fake it, especially when they are older. I did when I was with my first boyfriend because he had the right to know. It is potentially a big responsibility - more so than when you are in your teens. I would definitely want to know. Well, I wouldn't ask a girl about her sexual past (and most don't want to reveal that information anyway), why should I reveal anything about mine? Seems like a double standard. Don't ask , don't tell.
animalover Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You are comparing him to a rapist, not me, let's make that clear. Tricking is not the same as forcing. I do think people should state when they are virgins, yes and to be honest, most would probably struggle to fake it, especially when they are older. I did when I was with my first boyfriend because he had the right to know. It is potentially a big responsibility - more so than when you are in your teens. I would definitely want to know. I guess if someone should state that is virgin, others should state that they are sluts... right? 1
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 You all make over generalizations. I know several older male and female virgins that did not react badly when that person didnt want to see them. Just because one person went psycho on you, doesnt mean everyone else will. These comments reinforce that the OP must lie if he ever wants to have sex! You all are so damn judgmental It's not one person. It's lots of persons. I understand the fear. I also understand you. Why is it so hard for you to see where both parties are coming from? If you're a virgin, your idea of sexual relationships is limited at best. You just don't know.
pbjbear Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I burned the guy I lost my virginity to and he wasnt a virgin. (I was 19 when I lost it). I honestly liked him only so-so and wanted to have sex. I was way more immature back then. When I stopped seeing him he chased me for months afterwards. The guy after that I dated, I went kinda psycho after I stopped seeing him...because I liked him ALOT. I know several other people with the same situation. Yeah, some virgins get clingy (and Ive known some who have) but it depends on their personality and I think you can spot those people pretty well. I was not surprised when those people got clingy. People who assume every single virgin will go quote and quote "psycho" are judgmental.
Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I faked it. And hell, I aced my exam! Nah, not really, I kind of sucked. Then again I was younger, she probably knew I was a virgin anyway. I just don't think it's tricking them into having sex. They want to have sex. Not telling them you're a virgin is not like not telling them about STD's. She probably did know yes. She probably expected it and that's the difference. If it wasn't tricking, people wouldn't be so against having sex with virgins, would they though? Clearly it's tricking if you don't tell someone when that person would prefer to have the choice?
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 I burned the guy I lost my virginity to and he wasnt a virgin. (I was 19 when I lost it). I honestly liked him only so-so and wanted to have sex. I was way more immature back then. When I stopped seeing him he chased me for months afterwards. The guy after that I dated, I went kinda psycho after I stopped seeing him...because I liked him ALOT. I know several other people with the same situation. Yeah, some virgins get clingy (and Ive known some who have) but it depends on their personality and I think you can spot those people pretty well. I was not surprised when those people got clingy. People who assume every single virgin will go quote and quote "psycho" are judgmental. People who think others are judgmental are judgmental. That is probably the most stupid word I've heard all day. No, make that in my lifetime. Judgmental.. Please, everyone is judgmental. We judge all day long. 1
Emilia Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 People who assume every single virgin will go quote and quote "psycho" are judgmental. Well everyone on the whole planet is judgemental just about different things. Hardly news.
AlexDP Posted January 30, 2013 Posted January 30, 2013 She probably did know yes. She probably expected it and that's the difference. If it wasn't tricking, people wouldn't be so against having sex with virgins, would they though? Clearly it's tricking if you don't tell someone when that person would prefer to have the choice? If I'm single and dating a cute girl and we have sex and then I find out she was a virgin, am I going to be angry?
Recommended Posts