HitMeNow Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 This is what my ideal personality type is and I wanted to see if girls had the same view. Bold, strong, easy going, doesn't get affected too easily, down to earth, doesn't take himself too seriously, caring, passionate, open minded, independent, knows how to tease, CONFIDENT (in the way he speaks, walks, and does everything).
superb Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 Confident but not arrogant. Happy with his life. Funny. Loyal. Honesty....if I don't see a level of seriousness in a man I leave him alone. Being polite and having empathy is great. My #1 thing I admire about men is their ability to father their children. 2
monicaelise Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 The list looks about right, but I personally could do without "bold" or "caring" and would second superb's "funny" and "loyal". 1
TaserTag Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 I look for people who are kindhearted, funny, open & honest, reliable, happy and self-aware. And I love that my husband is a very calm, patient, gentle, quietly confident sort of person. I like it when a guy can take charge and is sure of himself, but he doesn't put down others and is happy to explain things to someone else or help someone else. 1
TaraMaiden Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 More than Neanderthal but less than Einstein. 1
Treasa Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 Honest, funny, compassionate, must like animals, open-minded, preferably believe in God (that's a personal one for me), can give me **** as well as take it, loves sex with me, and isn't a deadbeat.
pbjbear Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 Humour is a big one- I am goofy and dont like it when people dont embrace my goofiness and randomness I have no preference for introvert or extrovert I have liked both types Honesty is another big one I am a big fan of kindness and empathy...the lack of these traits in men today is the reason why I am still single. I could have easily been in several relationships with men who were not kind nor empathetic that wanted me (and I mean truly having these traits and showing them more than once in awhile, not faking it in the beginning). I think most men, when you get to know them, are emotionally cold. The men on this site are not the norm for my environment
Author HitMeNow Posted January 29, 2013 Author Posted January 29, 2013 Humour is a big one- I am goofy and dont like it when people dont embrace my goofiness and randomness I have no preference for introvert or extrovert I have liked both types Honesty is another big one I am a big fan of kindness and empathy...the lack of these traits in men today is the reason why I am still single. I could have easily been in several relationships with men who were not kind nor empathetic that wanted me (and I mean truly having these traits and showing them more than once in awhile, not faking it in the beginning). I think most men, when you get to know them, are emotionally cold. The men on this site are not the norm for my environment I think, most men YOU GET TO KNOW are emotionally cold. I think the reason you get attracted to them is that indifference. I.e. - Would you like a guy that calls you all the time and is all lovie dovie? He would not be cold, but you probably would never give him the time of the day, because he's not that "manly". I know enough girls, who confide in me and none of them give a single chance to "the nice guy" who approaches them telling them they're so "sweet" and that they would be able to provide for them. And all this "empathic" things.
pbjbear Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 (edited) I think, most men YOU GET TO KNOW are emotionally cold. I think the reason you get attracted to them is that indifference. I.e. - Would you like a guy that calls you all the time and is all lovie dovie? He would not be cold, but you probably would never give him the time of the day, because he's not that "manly". I know enough girls, who confide in me and none of them give a single chance to "the nice guy" who approaches them telling them they're so "sweet" and that they would be able to provide for them. And all this "empathic" things. Absolutely not, if a guy doesnt seem into me or seems ingenuine I stop seeing him. I have turned away lots of players and womanizers and I have had many men (like over 10) date me for a month or two where they are so nice and sweet and then when the courting is over their true colors come out. After some time Ive learned how someone acts in the beginning of dating isnt usually a true representation of themselves, and now if a guy changes like that I cut him loose. I have done it with 2 men last year so no, Im not all talk! You dont count because you seem to go into FWB's, not looking for a gf, but many men are smart and fake things for a decent amount of time to get sex/win power or control over a girl. Also, I use to be a bartender, and boy, the girls who approach emotionally cold, player, douchebag types are not mature, sweet, non-shallow girls...I find these girls either love casual sex and dealing with douchey guys, or they have looooow self esteem You are confusing sweet and empathetic with being a doormat. You do realize you can be a nice person without letting people walk all over you? With men there is no distinction...most men I meet are either wussy boys (I honestly dont meet too many of them in NYC though) or they are cold, cocky guys. Take me for example, I am sure everyone here thinks I am bitch but sorry, I have self respect and the self esteem of many of the women that post here kind of appall me. If you are not mean to me, I will most def be nice to you though Edited January 29, 2013 by pbjbear 1
Els Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 I think, most men YOU GET TO KNOW are emotionally cold. I think the reason you get attracted to them is that indifference. I.e. - Would you like a guy that calls you all the time and is all lovie dovie? He would not be cold, but you probably would never give him the time of the day, because he's not that "manly". I know enough girls, who confide in me and none of them give a single chance to "the nice guy" who approaches them telling them they're so "sweet" and that they would be able to provide for them. And all this "empathic" things. There is a HUGE spectrum between indifference and needy. Knowing how to tailor your approach to the particular girl you're pursuing (or, conversely, pursuing so many that you'll succeed by sheer odds) is key. Nobody likes a needy person, but the vast majority of women you actually want a R with are not likely to fall head over heels for indifference. Balance.
Author HitMeNow Posted January 29, 2013 Author Posted January 29, 2013 There is a HUGE spectrum between indifference and needy. Knowing how to tailor your approach to the particular girl you're pursuing (or, conversely, pursuing so many that you'll succeed by sheer odds) is key. Nobody likes a needy person, but the vast majority of women you actually want a R with are not likely to fall head over heels for indifference. Balance. Idk, from experience, what has mostly gotten girls attracted to me has been that "mysterious, collected, reserved" vibe (and maybe a bit of looks). I am not a super social outgoing person. Then once they get to know me, they WILL get to know the genuine nice person behind that. But if I had shown that side of me, without anyone asking, then I'd just be a regular guy, I think. I am a genuine caring guy. I just don't like to be a pursuer. If a girl wants me she will just come to me.
Els Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 Idk, from experience, what has mostly gotten girls attracted to me has been that "mysterious, collected, reserved" vibe (and maybe a bit of looks). I am not a super social outgoing person. Then once they get to know me, they WILL get to know the genuine nice person behind that. But if I had shown that side of me, without anyone asking, then I'd just be a regular guy, I think. I am a genuine caring guy. I just don't like to be a pursuer. If a girl wants me she will just come to me. Eh, whatever works for you. I've personally never been with someone who was indifferent in the beginning (although not with people who were needy either), but that's just me. 1
pbjbear Posted January 29, 2013 Posted January 29, 2013 Idk, from experience, what has mostly gotten girls attracted to me has been that "mysterious, collected, reserved" vibe (and maybe a bit of looks). I am not a super social outgoing person. Then once they get to know me, they WILL get to know the genuine nice person behind that. But if I had shown that side of me, without anyone asking, then I'd just be a regular guy, I think. I am a genuine caring guy. I just don't like to be a pursuer. If a girl wants me she will just come to me. Nothign wrong with that. But your personality does attract a certain type of person. Not all girls will want to do all the chasing...actually society dictates to us if we do that, the guy really must not be into us.
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