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Do I take her virginity?


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Posted (edited)

Little bit of a back story -

 

I just found out my "girlfriend" of one year has been maintaining two relationships the entire time. We're both 26. I live with my girlfriend and our mutual friend, and we've been together for just over a year. When we started to see each other, she had a long distance boyfriend of four years, whom she had claimed to cut things off with. I spend nearly every weeknight and every single weekend with the girl, so it took some intense deception and careful attention to pull this off.

 

I talked to the other guy on the phone yesterday, and he told me she never broke up with him. He said it all made sense, because she would only talk to him during her work hours, and always had excuses for why she couldn't talk at night or during the weekends. She told him she was going to try to move there in August, in December, and now in February, but he said she always found some excuse. They would tell each other "I love you" (so did we). He confirmed that she never physically saw him or visited him for the last year. He thought he had a girlfriend of 5 years.

 

She basically is begging me not to dump her, after I told her she could go **** herself and she needed to find a new place to live. I still feel this way, as I have no intention of getting back together with her. She keeps saying she will do anything, that she was a coward and was too afraid to hurt the other guy.

 

Here's the other wrinkle - she is a virgin. She isn't waiting for marriage, but for the "right situation". In the last few months she had been talking more about having sex with me, and even went on birth control two months ago to prepare. I never put any substantial pressure on her, but did not hide my desire to have sex with her.

 

Now that she's basically ripped a year of my life away and had me believe I had a girlfriend of a year when I really did not, I am seriously considering taking advantage of her begging and pleading and saying she'll do anything to take her virginity and then ****ing kick that bitch's ass to the curb. Thoughts?

 

You have to understand - this person deliberately lied to my face for a year (and the other guy's), and basically had me living in a false reality. I really do feel that she stole a year of my 20's away from me. I do not condone cheating, even if she never physically saw him again. To me it's a stealing of one's life to make them believe they live in a reality that does not actually exist. I have been respectful of her sexual choices, but now I don't give a ****.

 

Thanks!

Edited by mordor
Posted

Do as you please. But I do not see a difference between her cheating and you cheating. You'll be no better, but this is up to you.

 

If a person slaps you in the face, then you slap them back; there is no difference.

 

I assume she is still with this other Guy, poor him. Poor you, but you're going down her path.

Posted

What contraceptive method? Since you're really talking about taking a risk w an established liar.

  • Author
Posted
What makes you think she is not lying about being virgin too?

It's possible, I guess. One of the main questions the boyfriend of 5 years asked is if I ever slept with her, because he hadn't. It's possible that she's not, but it would have had to be some random thing. It would surprise me, since she's been so ardent about not having sex in our relationship - doesn't make much sense to me.

  • Author
Posted
What contraceptive method? Since you're really talking about taking a risk w an established liar.

 

Good point. She's on BC, but I can't know for sure if she's completely following her daily pill. I'll just wear a condom and also pull out.

Posted

I understand your anger but I think it's sad/pathetic that she's resumed to having sex so you don't dump her ya know? I think if you want to dump her, do it. Don't play this revenge game, it's useless and you won't feel any better.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

Obviously I go for this, right?

Posted

I would just drop her and leave it at that.

 

It also sounds like you're a virgin and since you've been holding off for so long, why not wait a bit longer for someone special as well?

 

She sounds anything but special.

Posted
Little bit of a back story -

 

I just found out my "girlfriend" of one year has been maintaining two relationships the entire time. We're both 26. I live with my girlfriend and our mutual friend, and we've been together for just over a year. When we started to see each other, she had a long distance boyfriend of four years, whom she had claimed to cut things off with. I spend nearly every weeknight and every single weekend with the girl, so it took some intense deception and careful attention to pull this off.

 

I talked to the other guy on the phone yesterday, and he told me she never broke up with him. He said it all made sense, because she would only talk to him during her work hours, and always had excuses for why she couldn't talk at night or during the weekends. She told him she was going to try to move there in August, in December, and now in February, but he said she always found some excuse. They would tell each other "I love you" (so did we). He confirmed that she never physically saw him or visited him for the last year. He thought he had a girlfriend of 5 years.

 

She basically is begging me not to dump her, after I told her she could go **** herself and she needed to find a new place to live. I still feel this way, as I have no intention of getting back together with her. She keeps saying she will do anything, that she was a coward and was too afraid to hurt the other guy.

 

Here's the other wrinkle - she is a virgin. She isn't waiting for marriage, but for the "right situation". In the last few months she had been talking more about having sex with me, and even went on birth control two months ago to prepare. I never put any substantial pressure on her, but did not hide my desire to have sex with her.

 

Now that she's basically ripped a year of my life away and had me believe I had a girlfriend of a year when I really did not, I am seriously considering taking advantage of her begging and pleading and saying she'll do anything to take her virginity and then ****ing kick that bitch's ass to the curb. Thoughts?

 

You have to understand - this person deliberately lied to my face for a year (and the other guy's), and basically had me living in a false reality. I really do feel that she stole a year of my 20's away from me. I do not condone cheating, even if she never physically saw him again. To me it's a stealing of one's life to make them believe they live in a reality that does not actually exist. I have been respectful of her sexual choices, but now I don't give a ****.

 

Thanks!

 

Two wrongs don't make a right.

 

You can see it as you lost a year, or you can see it as you found out how she is after only a year instead of 5 like the other guy.

 

Either way, revenge is short-term gratification that leads to regret. Just let it go. I would tell her to move out and not waste anymore time plotting or taking revenge. That is a true waste of your time.

Posted

This is a waste of time. Dont do it.

Posted

No, dude. Don't do it. This girl seems shifty as hell, and very low self-esteemed. Go find a nicer girl/be single for a while.

  • Author
Posted

I'm not a virgin, but I am pretty certain she is. Regardless of if she is or isn't, the more I think about it, the more stellar an idea it becomes. I've got to live with this bitch for at least another month, I might as well use the **** out of her. I don't think you guys are thinking clearly - this is a primo opportunity!

Posted

Why in the hell would you want her in your life long enough to screw her?

 

Shake the dust off your feet and move on.

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