3 More Days til THE Day....

[lakerman34]

I should preface this with 2 bits of information:

1) I've already posted about this girl before

2) I'm an overthinker by nature

 

OK, so like I've told you guys before, I'm going to South Africa next Wednesday (Feb. 5) for 11 weeks on a surgery internship.

 

I JUST graduated out of college this past December. My roommate introduced me to this girl [i wasn't really interested in meeting her, but decided to, I was having a hard time getting fully over my ex (I've been over my ex for a while now, so she's no longer a problem)] just 2 days before I left school for good. She's a year younger, so she still has 3 semesters left (classes actually start Monday for her).

 

We pretty much hit it off right away. She told me how she thought I was like a "frat bro" when she first met me, but didn't know that I was as cool as I was.

 

This girl is a total bro. Not very emotional, not into games, very OK with breaking my balls, and (for sake of an example) never has worn perfume because she doesn't see the point of "spending a lot of money on smelly water."

 

EXTREMELY low-maintenance, just like me. Frankly, she is my dream girl in so many ways.

 

This Friday (as of right now) I'm going back to my school to visit her. Gonna drink a bottle of bourbon with her, take her to the Presidential Ball (I explicitly asked her to be my date, she accepted), watch a movie, go to dinner, and the rest we'll leave to fate

 

I got drunk on Friday night and drunk texted her calling her cute and asking her if she was gonna wear heels on our date b/c "a girl that wears heels can get me to do anything," which she responded "anything, huh? guess I should pack my heels."

 

Now, here is where overthinking is my problem: after that night, we joked about me drunk texting her, but lately, she hasn't really been responding much to my texts (here and there she does, sometimes waiting hours after a text), or messages on Facebook (we talk thru texts and Facebook, that's it. She's very adverse to voice talking).

 

She called me "man" which, for some reason, didn't rub me the right way. This girl has more guy friends than girl friends BECAUSE she just gets along with guys later (this girl doesn't have a catty bone in her body). She told me when we first met (she was drunk and high) that she ALWAYS got friendzoned b/c she comes across as such a guy and she wants a guy she can just chill with, watch a movie with, talk to, and would treat her feminine (she looks very girly, long, straight brown hair, nice curvacious body, nice breast and a very nice butt, she's a runner). To me, she could be the perfect girl. My friends told me I was too aggressive and obvious in my approach to her (I was drunk and high as well, but I do tend to be aggressive), but she has told me in conversation that she needs a guy who "has big balls and a lot of confidence to match mine. Most guys think I'm such damsel in distress and, no, I'm not. I'm not some ditzy 'I broke a nail' girl."

 

I know she's got school and all now, but it just sounds to me like she's growing a bit uninterested. There's this game of 'pull him in, then let him go' that she seems to be playing with me. One night, I'll flirt w/ her, she'll flirt w/ me, it sounds like we are going to bounce on each others' bones as soon as we see each other, but the next, it seems like she sees me as "just another guy friend that's coming over to chill, and then he'll sleep in one of his guy friend's rooms, and drive home the next morning."

 

Which leads me to ANOTHER problem. If things ARE going great between she and I, we sleep together (which, I do imagine is going to happen), I don't know if it is wise to get in anything with her. I'm going to South Africa for 11 weeks (although I can see her right after), may want to be single for that, don't know if she'll wait around for me if I choose to be single for that, AND I will be going to medical school in Philadelphia (about 90 min. away from her). I think she and I will talk about this, but I just don't know if it's worth it. I know I can trust her 100% though if we are going to be far apart.

[in_absentia]

You haven't even kissed yet, so cool the thoughts about the future and being a distance away. 11 weeks isn't long, and 90mins isn't a long period of time either. I have no advice on how to impress her or get her to like you, though just play it cool and see how it goes. It's not too attractive to me (as a woman) if a guy makes it blatantly obvious really early on how much he likes me.

[lakerman34]

You haven't even kissed yet, so cool the thoughts about the future and being a distance away. 11 weeks isn't long, and 90mins isn't a long period of time either. I have no advice on how to impress her or get her to like you, though just play it cool and see how it goes. It's not too attractive to me (as a woman) if a guy makes it blatantly obvious really early on how much he likes me.

 

You're absolutely right. I'm a future-oriented guy though, by nature. In everything I do. In order for this to work, I have to see how it plays out in the future in my mind.

 

But yeah, that's all in my head, I'm not going to do future talk w/ her, unless she brings it up. She kind of implicitly told me that she liked my being aggressive because "most guys don't have any balls, and they don't expect me to be as confident as I am, so I need a guy who is extremely confident and knows what he wants" (her words).

[lakerman34]

imma bump this

[lakerman34]

Alright, some things have happened.

 

So, I got drunk last weekend (I may be repeating myself here) and told her she was 'cute' and how 'a girl that can rock high heels can get me to do anything,' which she responded "ANYTHING, huh?"

 

Well, yesterday afternoon, she texts me. Her flatmate had plans for a party since last October that was supposed to be on the night of our date.

 

She completely forgot that she promised her flatmate she'd help out, so she texts me and tells me that she has to cancel, and figured I'd understand more than her flatmate.

 

I was freaking out, but played it cool. I told her "that's fine, I'm still going to head to the school to hang out w/ my ex-flatmate anyway."

 

She then said "we can still split the bottle of bourbon," which I responded, "look, I want to go to the Presidential Ball, and I want to take you. Now, I had no intention of going for the entire 4 hours, so this may work better. This way, I can be all dressed up to pick you up, and it'll be cute. So I'll pick you up at midnightish?"

 

She thanked me for understanding, and told me 'sounds good, but she can't make any guarantees on the semi-formal part' (she is a VERY blunt girl). I told her I'd call her Friday afternoon to get final plans.

 

This COULD be better than the original plan b/c originally we were going to have dinner together, watch a movie, drink, go to the semi-formal, then hang out (too long of a date, if you ask me). Now, only PART of the semi-formal, drink, hang out, POSSIBLY watch the movie.

 

HOWEVER, I still have this strange feeling that she is going to flake on me at the last moment. Also, on top of that, her best friend is a guy. Now, she's the type to get along better with guys than girls(not into girly talk, make-up, or any of that stuff, a true tomboy), but I know a couple of years ago she pursued him RIGHT after he got off a relationship, and it didn't work out. She RARELY brings him up to me (I think only 2 or 3 times for the past 7 weeks which we have talked together), but I've heard they have a very "interesting" friendship where, at sometimes, they seem very argumentative, and sometimes, they seem "in love." Some of her friends told me that they have relationship potential, others have told me that she friendzoned him a while ago.

 

He was abroad ALL last semester, and now he's back and I know they are hanging out A LOT. It makes me nervous. I have this bad feeling that if he wanted to make a move, he could have her. HOWEVER, she's into that MBTI stuff, and she's a Thinker, he's a Feeler, and she has told me that she can't see herself with a Feeler in the past (doesn't know how to deal with extreme emotions very well).

 

I'm not going to contact her in any shape, way, or form until Friday afternoon (like I told her). I 'lied' to her and told her I purchased the bottle of bourbon already and it's in the fridge chilling (so she feels sort of obligated to partake in festivities with me).

 

Which leads to my FINAL question. Sex. I feel like all conversations she and I have had are leading to sex being inevitable. That's cool, of course, I love sex, but I also don't want to feel like I can ruin anything with her. I will be in South Africa for about 80 days, and will keep in touch with her via FB. I almost feel like having sex with her will strengthen the bond, but I'm afraid of 'moving too fast' (a reason why my ex and I broke up back in October). I also think that it would eliminate her friend as an option if I slept with her (kind of like "he knew what he wanted, so he went for it, you're just a friend").

 

My best friend is in a happy, healthy relationship right now, and he told me that he and his girlfriend held off on sex until they both "knew they were ready." To be honest, I'm always ready for sex, I see it as a physical act more than an emotional act, and I feel like she may think the same way. He told me "then if it feels right, go for it." It always feels right for me, but I don't want to make her feel like "I don't want to REALLY have sex with him, but I want him to like me and not sleep around in South Africa."

 

Thoughts?

[pbjbear]

I find this amusing because based on your posts about how you treat girls and sex I said I thought you were a frat boy and you insisted you were not. You are clearly a frat boy after this thread...(not that thats neccessarily a bad thing)

 

anyways,

She might turned off by your "frat boy" ness...I recently stopped seeing a guy who gave me that vibe. He was nice and all, but I am just past all that immaturity, game playing and shallow stuff. You are very into game playing. I am blatantly honest and call guys out on their crap all the time like this girl and I have low tolerance for game playing.

 

It also might be the fact you are leaving for 11 weeks...I wouldnt take a guy who is going on a trip that long seriously until after he came back.

 

She also could be into the other guy. Who knows...

Edited January 31, 2013 by pbjbear

[lakerman34]

I find this amusing because based on your posts about how you treat girls and sex I said I thought you were a frat boy and you insisted you were not. You are clearly a frat boy after this thread...(not that thats neccessarily a bad thing)

 

anyways,

She might turned off by your "frat boy" ness...I recently stopped seeing a guy who gave me that vibe. He was nice and all, but I am just past all that immaturity, game playing and shallow stuff. You are very into game playing. I am blatantly honest and call guys out on their crap all the time like this girl and I have low tolerance for game playing.

 

It also might be the fact you are leaving for 11 weeks...I wouldnt take a guy who is going on a trip that long seriously until after he came back.

 

She also could be into the other guy. Who knows...

 

Thanks for your honesty.

 

She actually has told me that she INITIALLY thought I was fratty, but now she realizes that I'm VERY independent and, though I could become part of the douchiest frat on campus, she thinks I'd hate the whole "group-think" of frats and that I was much more of a GDI.

[pbjbear]

Thanks for your honesty.

 

She actually has told me that she INITIALLY thought I was fratty, but now she realizes that I'm VERY independent and, though I could become part of the douchiest frat on campus, she thinks I'd hate the whole "group-think" of frats and that I was much more of a GDI.

 

I dont think you are fratty because of that.

The way you describe women and the way you treat them reminds me of frat boys. I dated several frat boys in college and they are pretty immature, into game playing and put little emotional investment into sex but try to make it not seem that way to attract decent women. I have dated 2 guys since college who seemed nice and they hung out with douchey frat boy friends all the time and it was a huge turn off. Who you associate with (esp. your closest friends) does say alot about a person. Lots of girls are into guys like that so youll have female interest, but me personally, I am not into that (and I wasnt in college either...I dated all those men briefly)

 

I am not saying this is why she is acting distant, just saying, if she really is a tomboy and upfront about everything, girls like this can get turned off by it so its a possibility. Its hard to know why someone acts distant all of a sudden...everyone has this problem at some point in life...

[lakerman34]

I dont think you are fratty because of that.

The way you describe women and the way you treat them reminds me of frat boys. I dated several frat boys in college and they are pretty immature, into game playing and put little emotional investment into sex but try to make it not seem that way to attract decent women. I have dated 2 guys since college who seemed nice and they hung out with douchey frat boy friends all the time and it was a huge turn off. Who you associate with (esp. your closest friends) does say alot about a person. Lots of girls are into guys like that so youll have female interest, but me personally, I am not into that (and I wasnt in college either...I dated all those men briefly)

 

I am not saying this is why she is acting distant, just saying, if she really is a tomboy and upfront about everything, girls like this can get turned off by it so its a possibility. Its hard to know why someone acts distant all of a sudden...everyone has this problem at some point in life...

 

My two best friends: one is a medical student at Johns Hopkins University, one is getting into architecture. Those are who I associate myself with haha.

 

I'm actually VERY against games. My ex-gf (when things were starting to spiral down), I constantly would tell her "cut your BS." If this girl is having second thoughts about our date (I was very clear in calling it a date), I think she knows me well enough to know that I WANT her to tell me flat out "I'm no longer interested." Games and I don't get along. Frankly, every girl I've ever been interested in has played games, and all my friends tell me that the girls they were all interested in played games. Games is a fact of relationships for girls. Even the ones who SWEAR they don't play games (like my ex), do. I'm waiting for a girl to prove me wrong on this one....

[rushingwaters]

I read all of it. But this is far more complicated than it has to be. I'm also a girl who's very blunt and not too much into what I call "girly stuff."

 

I agree, 11 weeks and 90 minutes is not that long.

 

(1) Take her to the ball, as you two had originally planned.

(2) Bring flowers. Even if she's a tomboy, she will still secretly like it.

(3) Somewhere in the middle of the night, tell her that you like her a lot! Then ask her if she likes you. If she says yes (or appears to be blushing), I'd say go for a kiss. If she hesitates or it turns into an awkward moment, then well..I guess you have your answer?

 

Another thing... I don't know if I would trust a guy who involves alcohol with everything. I think that's why she thinks you're a frat boy. It's not attractive. Do you two have any moments together when alcohol is not involved?

[pbjbear]

Alright, some things have happened.

 

So, I got drunk last weekend (I may be repeating myself here) and told her she was 'cute' and how 'a girl that can rock high heels can get me to do anything,' which she responded "ANYTHING, huh?"

 

Well, yesterday afternoon, she texts me. Her flatmate had plans for a party since last October that was supposed to be on the night of our date.

 

She completely forgot that she promised her flatmate she'd help out, so she texts me and tells me that she has to cancel, and figured I'd understand more than her flatmate.

 

I was freaking out, but played it cool. I told her "that's fine, I'm still going to head to the school to hang out w/ my ex-flatmate anyway."

 

She then said "we can still split the bottle of bourbon," which I responded, "look, I want to go to the Presidential Ball, and I want to take you. Now, I had no intention of going for the entire 4 hours, so this may work better. This way, I can be all dressed up to pick you up, and it'll be cute. So I'll pick you up at midnightish?"

 

She thanked me for understanding, and told me 'sounds good, but she can't make any guarantees on the semi-formal part' (she is a VERY blunt girl). I told her I'd call her Friday afternoon to get final plans.

 

This COULD be better than the original plan b/c originally we were going to have dinner together, watch a movie, drink, go to the semi-formal, then hang out (too long of a date, if you ask me). Now, only PART of the semi-formal, drink, hang out, POSSIBLY watch the movie.

 

HOWEVER, I still have this strange feeling that she is going to flake on me at the last moment. Also, on top of that, her best friend is a guy. Now, she's the type to get along better with guys than girls(not into girly talk, make-up, or any of that stuff, a true tomboy), but I know a couple of years ago she pursued him RIGHT after he got off a relationship, and it didn't work out. She RARELY brings him up to me (I think only 2 or 3 times for the past 7 weeks which we have talked together), but I've heard they have a very "interesting" friendship where, at sometimes, they seem very argumentative, and sometimes, they seem "in love." Some of her friends told me that they have relationship potential, others have told me that she friendzoned him a while ago.

 

He was abroad ALL last semester, and now he's back and I know they are hanging out A LOT. It makes me nervous. I have this bad feeling that if he wanted to make a move, he could have her. HOWEVER, she's into that MBTI stuff, and she's a Thinker, he's a Feeler, and she has told me that she can't see herself with a Feeler in the past (doesn't know how to deal with extreme emotions very well).

 

I'm not going to contact her in any shape, way, or form until Friday afternoon (like I told her). I 'lied' to her and told her I purchased the bottle of bourbon already and it's in the fridge chilling (so she feels sort of obligated to partake in festivities with me).

 

Which leads to my FINAL question. Sex. I feel like all conversations she and I have had are leading to sex being inevitable. That's cool, of course, I love sex, but I also don't want to feel like I can ruin anything with her. I will be in South Africa for about 80 days, and will keep in touch with her via FB. I almost feel like having sex with her will strengthen the bond, but I'm afraid of 'moving too fast' (a reason why my ex and I broke up back in October). I also think that it would eliminate her friend as an option if I slept with her (kind of like "he knew what he wanted, so he went for it, you're just a friend").

 

My best friend is in a happy, healthy relationship right now, and he told me that he and his girlfriend held off on sex until they both "knew they were ready." To be honest, I'm always ready for sex, I see it as a physical act more than an emotional act, and I feel like she may think the same way. He told me "then if it feels right, go for it." It always feels right for me, but I don't want to make her feel like "I don't want to REALLY have sex with him, but I want him to like me and not sleep around in South Africa."

 

Thoughts?

 

The bolded parts is where I am getting my info from

 

Alcohol, game playing, focusing on sex so much. How about you have sex when its right and not plan everything so meticulously so you can get some from her?

You seem to spend most of your time with frat boys too

Edited January 31, 2013 by pbjbear

[rushingwaters]

Concerning this whole fratty thing:

 

how you see yourself is different from how others see you. Other people can't read your mind so they will read your behavior and actions. Your thoughts and values may not be fratty but your spoken words and actions (or at least the ones you state here in this thread) do not reflect that.

[lakerman34]

I read all of it. But this is far more complicated than it has to be. I'm also a girl who's very blunt and not too much into what I call "girly stuff."

 

I agree, 11 weeks and 90 minutes is not that long.

 

(1) Take her to the ball, as you two had originally planned.

(2) Bring flowers. Even if she's a tomboy, she will still secretly like it.

(3) Somewhere in the middle of the night, tell her that you like her a lot! Then ask her if she likes you. If she says yes (or appears to be blushing), I'd say go for a kiss. If she hesitates or it turns into an awkward moment, then well..I guess you have your answer?

 

Another thing... I don't know if I would trust a guy who involves alcohol with everything. I think that's why she thinks you're a frat boy. It's not attractive. Do you two have any moments together when alcohol is not involved?

 

She has told me purple is her favorite color. I can make this whole flower thing work. "I know you're not one to like flowers, but I was at the store, saw these, I knew purple was your favorite color, so I had to." I think you're right, she WOULD love that.

 

And as for alcohol, here's the thing. We hung out only twice physically together (with friends). I actually didn't want to meet her because I was graduating and I got off a relationship with a girl that I may have been in love with (the first time I may have ever been in love), or very deeply infatuated with. I don't know.

 

Both times, we had intellectual conversations (we take pride in saying "we went to public high school, have no legacy, and are Ivy-leaguers ). Second time I didn't even know she was coming to hang out, it was the last time I was hanging out with my roommates, so I brought beers. She came and was already tipsy, laughy, and all that. She got drunk, I got drunk. I get touchy-feely when I'm drunk, I was brushing up against her, and she was very OK with it. At one point, I peeled back the label on my water bottle, and she told me "you know that's a sign of sexual frustration?" I laughed, and she told me she was sexually frustrated herself (now, in retrospect, I think she was very willing to one-night stand with me). But, the past 7-8 weeks, we've texted/FB messaged each other pretty much non-stop. It has cooled down more recently though. Sometimes, we went 2 or 3 days of not talking to each other, so I'd send her a funny picture or something and it'd spark conversation. That really hasn't worked very well this time around, but again, she IS in school.....she HATED being at home and would joke with me that she would 'ONLY talk to me when she was bored and, thing is, being at home is very boring.'

[lakerman34]

The bolded parts is where I am getting my info from

 

Alcohol, game playing, focusing on sex so much. How about you have sex when its right and not plan everything so meticulously so you can get some from her?

You seem to spend most of your time with frat boys too

 

Also, not EVERYBODY sees sex as an emotional act. I know a few girls that see it as solely physical. I have a STRONG feeling that she is one of them.

 

And yeah, I've invested the last 2 months on this girl. Right now, I should be studying cardiology, but instead I'm on this forum (not a big deal though). She seemed VERY interested and obviously so, but it SEEMS as if it cooled down.

 

Then again, she told me early on that when she likes a guy, she tries to keep it cool, and is very chill, and then the guy gets confused and thinks he is 'just a friend,' and then when she FINALLY reveals to him that she likes him, he is already over it. (She tells me she is constantly being friendzoned by guys). I think there is a strong possibility that this is happening to me right now too.

[pbjbear]

Nah, I doubt it. Ive heard that line from frat boys before, guys tend to overestimate stuff when it comes to attaining sex... 2 months? she would have slept with you by now if you and her agreed on that sex part.

 

I really dont think shes all that interested (the reasons why are up in the air...dont drive yourself crazy over it, after all youre leaving for 11 weeks! and girls can be fickle sometimes) I get what youre saying but youve made it obvious youre into her. If shes being flakey after that most likely she is not that interested. Sorry. Like I said, your lifestyle attracts certain girls and there are girls very into that, so youll have other female interests

[rushingwaters]

She has told me purple is her favorite color. I can make this whole flower thing work. "I know you're not one to like flowers, but I was at the store, saw these, I knew purple was your favorite color, so I had to." I think you're right, she WOULD love that.

 

And as for alcohol, here's the thing. We hung out only twice physically together (with friends). I actually didn't want to meet her because I was graduating and I got off a relationship with a girl that I may have been in love with (the first time I may have ever been in love), or very deeply infatuated with. I don't know.

 

Both times, we had intellectual conversations (we take pride in saying "we went to public high school, have no legacy, and are Ivy-leaguers ). Second time I didn't even know she was coming to hang out, it was the last time I was hanging out with my roommates, so I brought beers. She came and was already tipsy, laughy, and all that. She got drunk, I got drunk. I get touchy-feely when I'm drunk, I was brushing up against her, and she was very OK with it. At one point, I peeled back the label on my water bottle, and she told me "you know that's a sign of sexual frustration?" I laughed, and she told me she was sexually frustrated herself (now, in retrospect, I think she was very willing to one-night stand with me). But, the past 7-8 weeks, we've texted/FB messaged each other pretty much non-stop. It has cooled down more recently though. Sometimes, we went 2 or 3 days of not talking to each other, so I'd send her a funny picture or something and it'd spark conversation. That really hasn't worked very well this time around, but again, she IS in school.....she HATED being at home and would joke with me that she would 'ONLY talk to me when she was bored and, thing is, being at home is very boring.'

 

You guys have a lot of chemistry going on (lucky!). This could all work out very well and be a very satisfying relationship for the both of you on a physical and emotional level. But in order to make that work, you have to tell/show her that. Men and women see things differently. Spend more time with her, just the two of you, without alcohol, and without an attempt for sex. You only hung out with her twice in person and in a group setting... sorry to burst your bubble but it's still too early for sex if you want to be in an actual serious relationship with her.

[lakerman34]

Nah, I doubt it. Ive heard that line from frat boys before, guys tend to overestimate stuff when it comes to attaining sex... 2 months? she would have slept with you by now if you and her agreed on that sex part.

 

I really dont think shes all that interested (the reasons why are up in the air...dont drive yourself crazy over it, after all youre leaving for 11 weeks! and girls can be fickle sometimes) I get what youre saying but youve made it obvious youre into her. If shes being flakey after that most likely she is not that interested. Sorry. Like I said, your lifestyle attracts certain girls and there are girls very into that, so youll have other female interests

 

We haven't had any physical interaction at all in the past 2 months. She's at home in NYC, I'm at home in PA. Actually, we were all going to hang out (my roommates, their girlfriends, her and me) mid-January, but I called it off. So, reason why nothing physical is b/c we haven't even seen each other.

[pbjbear]

You guys have a lot of chemistry going on (lucky!). This could all work out very well and be a very satisfying relationship for the both of you on a physical and emotional level. But in order to make that work, you have to tell/show her that. Men and women see things differently. Spend more time with her, just the two of you, without alcohol, and without an attempt for sex. You only hung out with her twice in person and in a group setting... sorry to burst your bubble but it's still too early for sex if you want to be in an actual serious relationship with her.[/QUOTE]

 

Frat boys are not into this...they say anything they can to get sex. This guy is pretty good at making it seem hes not like this

[lakerman34]

You guys have a lot of chemistry going on (lucky!). This could all work out very well and be a very satisfying relationship for the both of you on a physical and emotional level. But in order to make that work, you have to tell/show her that. Men and women see things differently. Spend more time with her, just the two of you, without alcohol, and without an attempt for sex. You only hung out with her twice in person and in a group setting... sorry to burst your bubble but it's still too early for sex if you want to be in an actual serious relationship with her.

 

Yeah, I think I'll definitely go for a kiss, because frankly, I'm not interested in having any more friends. If she goes in for more than a kiss, I think I'm going to slow her down and ask her if it (sex) is REALLY what she wants and honestly tell her that I like her and don't want to mess things up with sex.

 

But if she pulls a "shut up and take your pants off" with me (which has happened with other girls in the past, but they were understood as one-night stands), then my hands are tied.

[pbjbear]

Ehh, most likely she wont put out after some time and youll lose interest in her because shes a "goody two shoes" based on what you said about sex and girls in your other threads. Then she will have to sleep with you to maintain your interest

[rushingwaters]

Yeah, I think I'll definitely go for a kiss, because frankly, I'm not interested in having any more friends. If she goes in for more than a kiss, I think I'm going to slow her down and ask her if it (sex) is REALLY what she wants and honestly tell her that I like her and don't want to mess things up with sex.

 

But if she pulls a "shut up and take your pants off" with me (which has happened with other girls in the past, but they were understood as one-night stands), then my hands are tied.

 

Congrats man, you got it! And I bolded the part that's most important. She HAS to know this part before you two have sex. Or else she'll be left wondering how you really feel about her and if you're only interested in her for sex.

[lakerman34]

Ehh, most likely she wont put out after some time and youll lose interest in her because shes a "goody two shoes" based on what you said about sex and girls in your other threads. Then she will have to sleep with you to maintain your interest

 

If a girl likes me, and doesn't put out after, say 6 months of pretty much constant hanging out, then yeah, she's friend-zoned and I lose interest. Find me a guy that this is not the case, and I'll find you a guy that's rather EXTREMELY sexually nervous, or homosexual.

[rushingwaters]

Ehh, most likely she wont put out after some time and youll lose interest in her because shes a "goody two shoes" based on what you said about sex and girls in your other threads. Then she will have to sleep with you to maintain your interest

 

Damn... I hope that doesn't happen. I don't think she's a "goody two shoes" though...

[lakerman34]

Damn... I hope that doesn't happen. I don't think she's a "goody two shoes" though...

 

Like I've said, we've had conversations about sex before, and she's told me that she has a "high weirdness threshold" and is into kinky sex.

 

We've had conversations about love, sex, all that. I've told her that pretty much all my sexual adventures, the girl hasn't been up to par, and she says the same about all the guys SHE'S ever slept with.

 

Now, tell me why I SHOULDN'T think that sex is inevitable after we go out on a date?

[rushingwaters]

Like I've said, we've had conversations about sex before, and she's told me that she has a "high weirdness threshold" and is into kinky sex.

 

We've had conversations about love, sex, all that. I've told her that pretty much all my sexual adventures, the girl hasn't been up to par, and she says the same about all the guys SHE'S ever slept with.

 

Now, tell me why I SHOULDN'T think that sex is inevitable after we go out on a date?

 

Because even if she wants to have sex, a girl can wait. This happens if a girl REALLY likes a guy AND is confident of herself (no low self-esteem) AND wants a serious relationship. She doesn't want to come off easy. I think your chances of having sex with her after a successful date is 50%. This percentage will continue to increase as you go on a few more successful dates.