What are signs of a Controlling &Possesive boyfriend?

[sweetgirl91]

What do they usually do and why do they ask questions and want detail??

has any one had an experience with a possesive or controlling relationship what are some signs??

[Eternal Sunshine]

Constantly keeps tabs on you via phone, IMs.

 

Wants to accompany you everywhere, even coffee with girlfriends, doesn't give you any alone time.

 

Asks you for details of every thought that passes through your head, as in why, how, etc

 

Is anxious & pissed off when you talk to another guy.

 

Pressures you to give him passwords to FB, phone etc.

 

Tries to cut you down with criticisms so that you feel he is the best you will ever get and won't leave.

 

Drains and exhaust you completely

 

Tells you how to dress, do your hair, talk, walk etc.

 

When your friends & family tell you that something is off.

[Babolat]

I can be this this way. With my current GF I am working hard not to; let the thought pass, not sharing my thoughts, questions...and it feels great! I am working hard at letting her have her own life and not worrying about "what if" or "what is she doing and with who" or asking more questions.

 

It stems from codependency; I know I have it and I am working hard on me too at the same time.

[KathyM]

My older sister was in a marriage with a man who was possessive and controlling and abusive. His parents were as well. She should have seen the red flags before marrying him, but he was a rebound relationship for her and she couldn't see reality at the time. Here are the signs he exhibited while they were dating, which indicated a possessive and controlling man:

 

1. He pressured her for sex on their first date.

 

2. He pressured her to commit to him way too early in the relationship (like within two weeks of meeting him).

 

3. He and his mother controlled every aspect of the wedding planning. My sister was an observer in the planning of her own wedding.

 

4. He told her that when they get married, she was going to have kids right away and stay home and take care of them.

 

There were other signs, but those are the ones that come to mind offhand.

 

Basically someone who tries to control where and when you go somewhere, and someone who gets jealous over nothing and creates drama over nothing.

[Charlene78]

I'll add some more (obvious ones).

 

- When you feel scared and at the same time limited in your freedom and your choices when he's around you

- When he uses violence to limit your freedom or control your choices

- When he knows where to look for you and where to find you, even if you run away from him