harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Hypothetical situation, so just give your input based on the scenario I put forward: Let's say you are talking to a girl with whom you have been very close for a while for. Then, very suddenly, you perceive a drastic drop in communication, which you assume is a loss of interest. What could cause such a sudden and immediate loss of interest? Girl met a new guy? Maybe some other important life issue came up? I dont think the guy himself would be at fault unless he did something really ****ed up and uncharacteristically disrespectful in other words, girls don't really lose interest with someone they have been intimate with for a long time unless a specific situation sparks it, agreed? They wouldn't just spontaneously wake up one day and be like "yawn, well, enough of that, that year sucked"... as far as I see it, thats illogical
polo girl Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 guys do it. maybe she thought you weren't into her.
Divasu Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 in other words, girls don't really lose interest with someone they have been intimate with for a long time unless a specific situation sparks it, agreed? Yes, agreed.
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 guys do it. maybe she thought you weren't into her. Well if that's the case, seems like the situation isn't a broken one, no? I.e. it can be fixed if the guy shows more interest...?
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 Yes, agreed. Do you think polo_girl's post constitutes a valid reason that would provoke such a drastic and immediate response in a girl? Or is that a stretch? Trying to keep this all hypothetical not doing a good job ha
Divasu Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Do you think polo_girl's post constitutes a valid reason that would provoke such a drastic and immediate response in a girl? Or is that a stretch? Trying to keep this all hypothetical not doing a good job ha Possibly. Hard to say though without knowing all the details.
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 Possibly. Hard to say though without knowing all the details. Let's just say I have a few particular theories on why girl A has started to show a loss of interest in boy B. One of them involves the fact that boy B never showed girl A enough interest in the first place. Which is his fault, and not a deal-breaker, and could in my eyes easily be remedied on his behalf (so long as she has not moved onto someone else). The other involves his manner of speaking to her. Let's say he speaks to her teasingly and playfully, but sometimes lays the innuendos on a bit thick. Which has been received pretty well by girl A up until this point, but no so much anymore for whatever reason (that is, assuming another guy is not part of the equation). Which, again, in my eyes is not a deal-breaker and can be fixed.
Divasu Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Let's just say I have a few particular theories on why girl A has started to show a loss of interest in boy B. One of them involves the fact that boy B never showed girl A enough interest in the first place. Which is his fault, and not a deal-breaker, and could in my eyes easily be remedied on his behalf (so long as she has not moved onto someone else). What type of 'interest' are we talking about? Did 'boy B' fail to demonstrate to 'girl a' that he cared about her, that he liked her, valued her, etc? The other involves his manner of speaking to her. Let's say he speaks to her teasingly and playfully, but sometimes lays the innuendos on a bit thick. Which has been received pretty well by girl A up until this point, but no so much anymore for whatever reason (that is, assuming another guy is not part of the equation). Which, again, in my eyes is not a deal-breaker and can be fixed. 'Innuendos' as in 'sexual innuendos'? I'd say if it's a combination of the above PLUS an inordinate supply of sexual innuendos, it will probably take a lot for her to take you seriously and/or have enough interest beyond the superficial.
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 What type of 'interest' are we talking about? Did 'boy B' fail to demonstrate to 'girl a' that he cared about her, that he liked her, valued her, etc? 'Innuendos' as in 'sexual innuendos'? I'd say if it's a combination of the above PLUS an inordinate supply of sexual innuendos, it will probably take a lot for her to take you seriously and/or have enough interest beyond the superficial. I mean, maybe he did. That's the problem... he never really knew. He never intentionally disrespected her, but it is possible that he did not possible show her enough attention. And again, it could have very well have been an "inordinate supply of sexual innuendos"... the problem is, when you interact with someone in a specific way for a long amount of time, you assume that they will continue to be open to that particular way of interaction. I have no problem toning down my ego in either situation and modifying the above 2 behaviors I mentioned, and am willing to put in the time to remedy the situation if these are the issues. To be completely honest, I'm not entirely sure that those two are the reasons for the lack of interest, but they are the two biggest ones which lay in my control to change. I guess by posting this thread, I was hoping to find validation to my theory that these two behaviors were ultimately little tiny things in the grander scheme of ****-ups that one can commit in a relationship, and that while they may hamper it, they can ultimately easily be fixed (or so you would imagine, at least)
Divasu Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Activate your private messages on here I want to ask you a personal question I'm to embarrassed to ask in open forum about sexual inuendos and sudden lost of interest from girls. Thanks! You're so tenacious. I know what you're going to ask and the answer is no. You're just going to have to keep guessing what the magic number is. I mean, maybe he did. That's the problem... he never really knew. He never intentionally disrespected her, but it is possible that he did not possible show her enough attention. And again, it could have very well have been an "inordinate supply of sexual innuendos"... the problem is, when you interact with someone in a specific way for a long amount of time, you assume that they will continue to be open to that particular way of interaction. I have no problem toning down my ego in either situation and modifying the above 2 behaviors I mentioned, and am willing to put in the time to remedy the situation if these are the issues. To be completely honest, I'm not entirely sure that those two are the reasons for the lack of interest, but they are the two biggest ones which lay in my control to change. I guess by posting this thread, I was hoping to find validation to my theory that these two behaviors were ultimately little tiny things in the grander scheme of ****-ups that one can commit in a relationship, and that while they may hamper it, they can ultimately easily be fixed (or so you would imagine, at least) So Guy B is you afterall, I knew it! Duh. Maybe just have a friendly chat with her, nothing sexual, and go from there.
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 (edited) Why not post it here? Might help some others out! You're so tenacious. I know what you're going to ask and the answer is no. You're just going to have to keep guessing what the magic number is. So Guy B is you afterall, I knew it! Duh. Maybe just have a friendly chat with her, nothing sexual, and go from there. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking too. Tone down on the cockiness/crudeness too, etc Edited January 27, 2013 by harnold
polo girl Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 i was dating a guy that kept sending me dirty texts when he was drunk. i lost interest immediately. didn't appreciate it. i really liked another guy and 'almost' started to see him UNTIL he had the audacity to criticize my car. his exact words were 'your merc is 3 years old and it's crap'. the sheer fact that he felt the need to critique what i have was an instant no go zone. oh and i lost interest recently (3 days ago) when this other guy (yes i liked two guys ) kept posting on facebook and making references about me. girls want emotional connection.
Shaun-Dro Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Hypothetical situation, so just give your input based on the scenario I put forward: Let's say you are talking to a girl with whom you have been very close for a while for. Then, very suddenly, you perceive a drastic drop in communication, which you assume is a loss of interest. What could cause such a sudden and immediate loss of interest? Girl met a new guy? Maybe some other important life issue came up? I dont think the guy himself would be at fault unless he did something really ****ed up and uncharacteristically disrespectful in other words, girls don't really lose interest with someone they have been intimate with for a long time unless a specific situation sparks it, agreed? They wouldn't just spontaneously wake up one day and be like "yawn, well, enough of that, that year sucked"... as far as I see it, thats illogical Women aren't logical creatures and never will be. The sooner you realize this, the better off you'll be.
Divasu Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 oh and i lost interest recently (3 days ago) when this other guy (yes i liked two guys ) kept posting on facebook and making references about me. girls want emotional connection. This reminds of an example. I recall reading on a public blog, there was a question "why do you enjoy having sex with your significant other" or something to that effect, and his response was "it releases tension" or "it's a great tension reliever". That just seemed cold and detached to me.
Author harnold Posted January 27, 2013 Author Posted January 27, 2013 i was dating a guy that kept sending me dirty texts when he was drunk. i lost interest immediately. didn't appreciate it. i really liked another guy and 'almost' started to see him UNTIL he had the audacity to criticize my car. his exact words were 'your merc is 3 years old and it's crap'. the sheer fact that he felt the need to critique what i have was an instant no go zone. oh and i lost interest recently (3 days ago) when this other guy (yes i liked two guys ) kept posting on facebook and making references about me. girls want emotional connection. I understand that some girls might be put off by those type of comments. But, I have had that sort of humor with her for a very long time, so I assumed she would be cool with it. But maybe it has started to wear thin. Either way, none of it was way too vulgar, graphic, or out of line, so I'm hoping its nothing that cant be fixed simply via some simple behavior modification
ChessPieceFace Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Let's say you are talking to a girl with whom you have been very close for a while for. Then, very suddenly, you perceive a drastic drop in communication, which you assume is a loss of interest. What could cause such a sudden and immediate loss of interest? Girl met a new guy? Most of the time that's the reason.
skylark100 Posted January 27, 2013 Posted January 27, 2013 Unless this hypothetical guy really said something disrespectful, and I mean it would have to be pretty bad, you'd think that if she showed interest than there would be a way to fix it. If she just flat out loses interest, there's another guy in the equation. Just the way it works. 1
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