Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I wasn't even trying to fall for this guy. It just happened. We've been friends for 10 months or so, but fairly casual friends. I started flirting with him, he started flirting with me, and things are going very well so far. Most people wouldn't consider him an alpha, nor would they consider him to be "hot", but he's hot to me. He's really smart and funny and sweet and can give me **** AND take it back from me. He's a little insecure about his weight, but I just want to pounce him whenever I see him. He's several years younger than me. He told me I'm not like most girls, and that I'm not shallow or selfish like most of the girls he's dated. So, if you're not having luck with girls, chances are it's NOT YOUR LOOKS. It's not about your money. It's about your personality, and your choice in girls. Find an awesome girl, and your looks (to most people) won't even matter. 10
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 I forgot to mention: Be open and receptive to those cues that a girl is flirting with you. I've flirted with guys, only to have them not respond due to shyness or completely lack of noticing, and I'm not a subtle person. And then later they bitch to me when I get a boyfriend that they wish they had gotten to me first. If someone is flirting with you, and you do nothing, don't complain that you're all alone. 1
TouchedByViolet Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I'm happy for you. Keep us posted on how things go. Personality does matter a lot. It's hard to know exactly how to improve that part of oneself though.
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 It really is, but this guy has the amazing ability to give sweet compliments out of the blue, and he listens REALLY well. Also, thank you!
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Nevermind, I'm trying to correct mistakes I didn't make.
Imajerk17 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 (edited) Well Treasa, hopefully he is mature and he can support himself as that is a hallmark of being an adult. (I'm only doing the math here: You are in your mid 20s so this guy must be around 20 and almost every 20-year-old in the USA is still dependent on parents.) Otherwise it just sounds to me that you are repeating the mistakes of your last relationship, where you were hooked on an immature douche who lived in his parents' basement. A lot of women seem to go for guys they can "mother" but I wouldn't call that a healthy dynamic. I wish you luck. But I wouldn't call this a success story sorry. Edited January 24, 2013 by Imajerk17 1
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Well Treasa, hopefully he is mature and he can support himself as that is a hallmark of being an adult. (I'm only doing the math here: You are in your mid 20s so this guy must be around 20 and almost every 20-year-old in the USA is still dependent on parents.) Otherwise it just sounds to me that you are repeating the mistakes of your last relationship, where you were hooked on an immature douche who lived in his parents' basement. A lot of women seem to go for guys they can "mother" but I wouldn't call that a healthy dynamic. I wish you luck. But I wouldn't call this a success story sorry. I'm 38, sweetie. I'm not calling it a success story. I'm just happy right now. If things don't work out, they don't work out, you know? And agreed on the no momma's boys anymore. 2
Imajerk17 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I'm 38, sweetie. I'm not calling it a success story. I'm just happy right now. If things don't work out, they don't work out, you know? And agreed on the no momma's boys anymore. Well you look 25 haha. That indeed does change everything. Best wishes to you!
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Well you look 25 haha. That indeed does change everything. Best wishes to you! You are my favorite person in the world right now. LOL I don't look 25, but thank you very much.
somedude81 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Noooo! She's taken! Glad for you Treasa. If I'm reading it right, you started the flirting then he flirted back? I wonder how long he was waiting for the go ahead signal from you.
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 He's not an alpha. What's wrong with that? And he by his own admission says that most girls don't find him hot. If you go by what most girls his age find hot, then most girls his age wouldn't find him hot. I didn't say that *I* didn't find him hot. I think he's smoking and I want to **** him every time I see him. I also didn't call him fat. I said he's insecure about his weight. I think his weight is fine. I also have no idea how you managed to completely misread my post.
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Noooo! She's taken! Glad for you Treasa. If I'm reading it right, you started the flirting then he flirted back? I wonder how long he was waiting for the go ahead signal from you. Yep! And I don't think he was waiting. I think I took him quite by surprise. A few well-placed flirty comments, he responded, and...then he started pursuing me.
tbf Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 He told me I'm not like most girls, and that I'm not shallow or selfish like most of the girls he's dated.While I'm happy for you, a word of caution with guys who paint exes with the same negative paint brush since he's the only commonality. Just be observant.
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 While I'm happy for you, a word of caution with guys who paint exes with the same negative paint brush since he's the only commonality. Just be observant. Oh God, I totally agree. He doesn't ever speak ill of anyone, though. He means girls his age, not so much exes. With his exes, he's friends with two of them, I believe, and the worst he's ever said was, "We just weren't compatible," or, "We could tell it wasn't going to progress any further."
KungFuJoe Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Oh God, I totally agree. He doesn't ever speak ill of anyone, though. He means girls his age, not so much exes. With his exes, he's friends with two of them, I believe, and the worst he's ever said was, "We just weren't compatible," or, "We could tell it wasn't going to progress any further." He's hiding something. It's pretty obvious. NO ONE is that civil about their exes. I would search closets and underneath loose floorboards for bodies the next time you're at his place and he's taking a shower or something. 2
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 This is what lead me to read that way your post... it looks like you are doing a charity party and showing off how nice you are dating poor ugly duck! Nope. Just trying to make a point to all the guys here that if you have a good personality and are a good listener and receptive to flirting and choose the right girls to go after, you CAN get awesome girls. I know people are going to criticize me for one thing or another because I don't have the amazing talent to write in such a way to make every single person in the world happy, but I honestly don't give a ****. Some people will hopefully get what I'm trying to say, and it will help them.
carhill Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Congrats.... One question: What impelled you, after ten months of being casual friends, to start flirting with him?
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 He's hiding something. It's pretty obvious. NO ONE is that civil about their exes. I would search closets and underneath loose floorboards for bodies the next time you're at his place and he's taking a shower or something. I also need to check his browser history, FB messages, and run a complete criminal background check on him. Dude, what would I do without you? You are seriously the wind beneath my wings. 1
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Congrats.... One question: What impelled you, after ten months of being casual friends, to start flirting with him? No freaking clue. Oh, wait...I had a boyfriend at the time. That's all I can come up with.
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 well its too soon to be like yahooooo. but im happy the start is great and sweet I'm going to yahoo anyway. I enjoy the journey just as much as the possible destination.
sid3 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Nope. Just trying to make a point to all the guys here that if you have a good personality and are a good listener and receptive to flirting and choose the right girls to go after, you CAN get awesome girls. So what you're trying to say is.... You're an awesome girl? 1
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 So what you're trying to say is.... You're an awesome girl? That wasn't my message, but yeah, I am. 2
Author Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Whatever... good luck with it.... you could have just say you have met an awesome guy who is funny and makes you feel good .... why did you feel compelled to say he is not hot (or not hot for others), not an alpha (sorry but all men want to be an alpha..), insecure with his weight... why did you feel the need to describe his negative points? Then you came with your nice sentence about awesome girls dating guys without the looks... I am not meaning any offense but I don't think your date would be flattered if he read your post... he may not tell you but I am sure he would not be flattered! Because there are tons of threads here from guys saying that you have to be "hot" (please notice the quotes and recognize them for what they are) and/or an alpha to get an awesome woman. I'm trying to disprove that theory.
rocketman122 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 hopefully it goes well for you and you'll get some good cunnilingus soon 1
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