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Gf pregnant dating 8 months?

Justaguy12

By Justaguy12
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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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We're only 21. My gf is a drop out of high school. We've been dating awhile and we're not financially ready for a baby. She's 6 weeks pregnant. But our families are religious and against children outside of marriage. They don't know and plus I'm still in college. And I really don't want kids anytime in the near future. She has beliefs against abortion. But she understands how I feel and she scheduled an abortion for Friday. But she is acting really like angry though at me. I feel like she is going to hold it against me what do I do?

weee111 Member

weee111

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You REALLY need to get off of the internet and go with her to see a counselor in person and talk about this before she goes through with it. Wherever she's having it done at should be able to refer you to someone.

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Ruby Slippers Established Member

Ruby Slippers

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Totally agree with the advice above. There are options. It doesn't sound like she really wants to get an abortion but feels pressured. That is not something to pressure anybody into doing.

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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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I thought providers offered counseling to make sure?

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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If her family is religious, she could be put out on the street if she goes through with the pregnancy. A bit cold to be living on the street. Sounds like she is angry because she was having fantasies of marrying you. Tell her it's a possibility in the future but not now. Ask her if she wants to be a single mother on welfare.

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weee111 Member

weee111

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I thought providers offered counseling to make sure?

 

I'm sure they offer something but it may not be required. Are you saying you didn't go with her to her appointment? That's at least part of the reason she's mad at you. This is a huge deal to her and she needs your support.

Keenly Established Member

Keenly

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Do not let anyone convince you to marry her if YOU YOURSELF have not come up with and accept that idea. It will ruin both of your lives if you are not ready for that, as I understand you might not be.

 

Just saying, its going to come up.

ascendotum Established Member

ascendotum

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Hold it against you? At 21 it's very, very unlikely that you'll be with her long term.

 

You know what would be with you long term? Child support payments.

 

Get on your knees and praise whatever deity you believe in if she goes through with the abortion. She's giving you the ultimate gift, freedom.

 

I agree with the posters who said see a counselor. I also agree with this ^. Its much easier to ride out her being angry with you for a number of months vs years of child support or being obligated to marry her to just to please both your families. Likewise for her life as a single mother on welfare is no easy ride either if you were to decide you are too young to have a family.

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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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Yea you're right it is a much more simple situation than what it could be.

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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Lie like hell, tell her anything she wants to hear as long as she has an abortion, even buy her a cheap ring and tell her she'd make a lovely bride. Then break up with her or make sure in the future she goes to Planned Parenthood for birth control implants in her arm, a diaphragm fitting or gets an IUD. That way she can't forget to take The Pill and put you in the same situation again.

 

Men, listen and learn!

pink_sugar Established Member

pink_sugar

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If her family is religious, she could be put out on the street if she goes through with the pregnancy. A bit cold to be living on the street. Sounds like she is angry because she was having fantasies of marrying you. Tell her it's a possibility in the future but not now. Ask her if she wants to be a single mother on welfare.

 

I agree. Yes it would be devastating for her, but it is also important for her to consider the father's feelings on the situation. Sounds like neither of them are fit to be parents. Unless she decides to go with adoption, it is best for her (being uneducated and all) not to have a child she cannot provide for. And it sounds like the parents wouldn't be in favor of her having a baby out of wedlock either. You both are young with plenty of years ahead of you to have a baby. I hope both of you are going to school or doing something to better yourselves, then you can have kids later when you are able to provide for them.

Edited by pink_sugar
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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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She's not seeming to back out of it and it is the night before

Untouchable_Fire Established Member

Untouchable_Fire

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She's not seeming to back out of it and it is the night before

 

Are you Ok with ending the life of your own child?

 

I don't think it's acceptable for you to push her into killing a child she may want. I think you should both sit down with a counselor and weigh this decision together.

 

I mean... who the hell kills a child just so they don't have to pay child support? How sick is that?

Rita86 Established Member

Rita86

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Are you Ok with ending the life of your own child?

 

I don't think it's acceptable for you to push her into killing a child she may want. I think you should both sit down with a counselor and weigh this decision together.

 

I mean... who the hell kills a child just so they don't have to pay child support? How sick is that?

 

Wtf. Who are you to tell him what's acceptable regarding an unborn fœtus?

The OP did not ask for a moral judgement and that abortion is evil.

You're really not helping

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pink_sugar Established Member

pink_sugar

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Are you Ok with ending the life of your own child?

 

I don't think it's acceptable for you to push her into killing a child she may want. I think you should both sit down with a counselor and weigh this decision together.

 

I mean... who the hell kills a child just so they don't have to pay child support? How sick is that?

 

 

She's only 6 weeks pregnant...there is no child yet. I agree she shouldn't feel forced, but you're exaggerating the issue here. If she gets the abortion, she should do it asap, so there is no "killing" anything.

aussietigerwolf Established Member

aussietigerwolf

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although if she wants this child and he pushes her into an abortion then she will resent him and quite possibly hate him, so he'll lose her anyway

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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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Well it's over she was really upset but its over now

aussietigerwolf Established Member

aussietigerwolf

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Well it's over she was really upset but its over now

 

she had the abortion or you broke up with her?

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Justaguy12 New Member

Justaguy12

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The first she had the abortion

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veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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yeah dude maybe figure out a way (um condoms) so that this doesn't happen again. Maybe also set your sights on someone who has graduated high school...you're prob lucky you are still in college, imagine if you were in your career, she'd def be keepin that kid.

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pink_sugar Established Member

pink_sugar

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Well it's over she was really upset but its over now

 

I know this is a hard time for both of you, but you both made the best decision since neither of you is able to support a child right now and would most likely have limited or no parental help. You're still young and have plenty of time for children when you are ready. Are you staying together? If so, I hope your gf will at least go back to school or get some sort of skills to offer some independence. Choose your partners wisely and take steps, like the others have said, to make sure this doesn't happen again until you're ready.

ChessPieceFace Established Member

ChessPieceFace

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Next time try not to bring a human life into the world and then end its life, just because you are lazy and irresponsible.

 

Mods - you wanna punish me for this statement? Bring it on. I'd rather be banned than not stand up and speak out for the human life that was killed by the OP and his GF.

pink_sugar Established Member

pink_sugar

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Next time try not to bring a human life into the world and then end its life, just because you are lazy and irresponsible.

 

Mods - you wanna punish me for this statement? Bring it on. I'd rather be banned than not stand up and speak out for the human life that was killed by the OP and his GF.

 

:rolleyes: No human life was brought into the world...no life was ended. Read up on what pregnancy is at 6 weeks. I agree, the OP and his GF were irresponsible, but he seems to have learned his lesson.

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ChessPieceFace Established Member

ChessPieceFace

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:rolleyes: No human life was brought into the world...no life was ended. Read up on what pregnancy is at 6 weeks. I agree, the OP and his GF were irresponsible, but he seems to have learned his lesson.

 

6 week fetus, google the image. Whatever, it's not like I'll ever convince the animals on this planet to have a conscience. Continue to roll your eyes at the termination of a human life. Society has programmed you well.

While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!
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