tigressA Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 From January 9th (day after I officially became single again). That was the day I made the decision. That's how long I'm closing myself off to dating and sex. I'm also seeking counseling. I never bothered with it after my abortion and the aftershocks are still there. I need to deal with them properly, along with my other 'issues'. This will be the longest 'dry spell' since I started dating and having sex. I have no doubt it will benefit me tremendously. Now all the people here whining about not getting enough attention can breathe easy; I won't have any trainwreck dating threads up for a long time :laugh: 8
Author tigressA Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Make sure to buy some toys. Oh I already have a real good one 1
Lani Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Good on you for making this decision! Take the time out, and get yourself where you want to be. Do some nice things, spoil yourself!
SmileFace Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 It will do you good. I am doing the same since my break up with the non-boyfriend back in September. It has been a bumpy ride getting all guys out of my life actually but I finally got my ex off my ass within the last month. However it is refreshing. Well, I tried the sex thing but I got wasted on vacation however it stopped there. Lol Anyway all the best. Please stick with this. Cancel your dating profiles and work on knowing yourself. Believe me after a couple of months you won't be as horny. However the first two months...hell 2
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Oh I already have a real good one Make sure to buy some toys. No sex means no sex. Toys included. It's only 6 months after all... 1
johan Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 You'll find a relationship when you aren't looking for one. 2
Author tigressA Posted January 24, 2013 Author Posted January 24, 2013 Believe me after a couple of months you won't be as horny. However the first two months...hell Actually, the pill I recently started on has killed off my drive quite a bit. So I guess I should feel grateful right now.
Lani Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 No sex means no sex. Toys included. It's only 6 months after all... Incorrect.. No sex means no sex, not no orgasms. 2
AMusing Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 It will do you good. Believe me after a couple of months you won't be as horny. However the first two months...hell I totally agree with both of these points. It sounds like an excellent decision for you. I'm very impressed with your resolve to work on your issues; it takes a lot of introspection and honesty to reach that point.
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Incorrect.. No sex means no sex, not no orgasms. I guess some people aren't committed enough. A human being can easily go 6 months without orgasm. 1
Treasa Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Just don't stop posting. Several of us would miss you too much. 2
SmileFace Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I guess some people aren't committed enough. A human being can easily go 6 months without orgasm. What exactly will be the point of going without an orgasm?
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 What exactly will be the point of going without an orgasm? Spending time thinking about life. Appreciating the beauty of the world. Having more time to spend traveling or reading, or doing projects. It allows one to clear your head, get thoughts in order. That sort of thing. Ever since I gave up masturbation (15 months ago) it's allowed me to focus on things that are truly important. It's just a suggestion though. Feel free to disregard it. 1
AMusing Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I guess some people aren't committed enough. A human being can easily go 6 months without orgasm. Well yeah, we all can go without... but why should she? Orgasms are awesome. TigressA getting to know herself better can include all facets of herself, from emotional to physical to spiritual to sexual. Not that there's anything wrong with someone choosing to step back from sexuality altogether, but there's also nothing wrong with someone who chooses not to forgo masturbation. A break from dating doesn't need to mean a break from sexuality; it's not about tigressA lacking commitment, it's about different motivations and focuses. 1
carhill Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 I do hope you'll post up some threads about the counseling process and how voluntary celibacy impacts your psyche. IME, now about 2.5 years post-D, six months will fly by. Good luck.
SmileFace Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Spending time thinking about life. Appreciating the beauty of the world. Having more time to spend traveling or reading, or doing projects. It allows one to clear your head, get thoughts in order. That sort of thing. Ever since I gave up masturbation (15 months ago) it's allowed me to focus on things that are truly important. It's just a suggestion though. Feel free to disregard it. Masturbation can take up about 5 mins of your time. I could have rubbed one out between my last post and this one. I really don't see the reason of cutting it off if it is something happens every other day or something. Now... if she was having 87 minute - candle lit sex with her self - yeah I will see the problem.
fortyninethousand322 Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Well yeah, we all can go without... but why should she? Orgasms are awesome. TigressA getting to know herself better can include all facets of herself, from emotional to physical to spiritual to sexual. Not that there's anything wrong with someone choosing to step back from sexuality altogether, but there's also nothing wrong with someone who chooses not to forgo masturbation. A break from dating doesn't need to mean a break from sexuality; it's not about tigressA lacking commitment, it's about different motivations and focuses. It was a bit tongue in cheek. I meant no offense by it, I admire TigressA. A far better person than I (I truly mean that). I mean going by her posting on here since I have no idea what kind of person she is in real life. But anyway, it was just a suggestion. One that helped me. Feel free to ignore it. 2
SmileFace Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 It was a bit tongue in cheek. I meant no offense by it, I admire TigressA. A far better person than I (I truly mean that). I mean going by her posting on here since I have no idea what kind of person she is in real life. But anyway, it was just a suggestion. One that helped me. Feel free to ignore it. Woah, you really don't think much of yourself.
AMusing Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Spending time thinking about life. Appreciating the beauty of the world. Having more time to spend traveling or reading, or doing projects. It allows one to clear your head, get thoughts in order. That sort of thing. Edit: Man, if you spend so much time masturbating that you don't have time for introspection, reading, enjoying nature, or traveling, well, maybe a break is a good idea. I do all those things and still have a few minutes to spare, here and there, for a little self-pleasure.
tbf Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 Dating sabbaticals and soul searching are always worth while. Good luck, tigress!
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 T - I am about to do the same. I am going to take 3 months off dating, FWBs, sex, the whole thing. I am going to disable all my dating accounts.
Radu Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 This is all SD81's fault, he convinced kiwi to get a sabatical from sex/masturbation. See what you started dude ???
johan Posted January 24, 2013 Posted January 24, 2013 If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was yours.
Treasa Posted January 25, 2013 Posted January 25, 2013 Ladies, I'll totally keep up the sex and masturbation until you return from your sabbaticals. 2
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