Taramere Posted January 20, 2013 Posted January 20, 2013 (edited) GAME OVER! Dating pretty much comes down to being fake, Talking about boring crap that only makes women happy Don't you have any funny stories and anecdotes? I might well be interested in reading about science, and I might enjoy playing a computer game, but as social conversational topics these are liable to send the other person to sleep unless you keep your references to them brief and manage to weave some entertainment (for the other person) value around them. That is not about other people being shallow or fake. It's about you immersing yourself in subjects you're interested in to the point where you become a bit antisocial about it. Anybody can be prone to that. I was out for dinner with a mixed group. One of the guys is an IT whizz. He was talking about having nerdy tendencies and said that he thinks he's got Asperger's on account of the way he gets embroiled in things to the point that he doesn't notice anything else going on around him. Everybody at the table, including his wife, had their own stories about things they get immersed in/get OCD about. All of us knew that feeling when you've become immersed in a subject, have spent most of the day reading about it...and then have social contact with other people, but still have that topic on your mind and want to rave on about it. Which is unfortunate for the person on the receiving end of your blethering, unless they too happen to have become immersed in exactly that same subject recently - in which case you'll fall on each other like the only two people in a five hundred mile stretch of desert. Or, if they're able to take your obsession du jour anduse it as the seed of a more general discussion that other people who haven't been spending the entire day reading up on it can participate in. Most of the conversations I have with people consist of anecdotes, rants, discussion of current events, talking about mutual friends (what are they up to? When did you last see them?) - and then just general entertaining crap where people put their own/the other person's quirks under the limelight. IOW banter and teasing. I don't really have conversations with people that focus around mundane questions like "how much do you earn" (which is a very rude question where I live in any event). If I do have one of the difficult, embarrassingly monotonous conversations you're describing with somebody, I'll bring it to a close as quickly and politely as possible. Sometimes you're just not in a social enough mood, or the other person isn't or the two of you really just don't click. It sounds as though you have difficulty getting into a fun, entertaining zone with women. You can keep blaming women for that, and criticising us as "boring" if you like...but continuing to do that isn't going to make your life any more fun, fulfilling and enjoyable. I think it's rare that it's just down to one person in the conversation being an exceptionally boring and shallow individual. When you deal with dull conversations by lumping all the blame for their dullness on the other person, you lose the opportunity to learn something new and potentially useful about yourself and the situations you don't do so well in. Edited January 20, 2013 by Taramere
MrCastle Posted January 20, 2013 Posted January 20, 2013 I can't remember the last time I had a legit conversation with a woman. It's pretty much small talk and banter with sexual innuendo and flirting peppered in. That will have to change when I get serious. I want a girl that's compatible with my personality
AlexDP Posted January 20, 2013 Posted January 20, 2013 I can't remember the last time I had a legit conversation with a woman. It's pretty much small talk and banter with sexual innuendo and flirting peppered in. That will have to change when I get serious. I want a girl that's compatible with my personality Bingo. And given that I like sex, talking to women is always interesting. That did sort of change with my long term girlfriend, I do talk with her about other stuff too. Sometimes.
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