youdunsay Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 To men who are above 30 who probably got into many relationships prior marriage (long like >3yrs and short like < 3, serious and not serious). You can choose the below. Multiple options allowed. a) You dated for quite some time. (please indicate how long you have dated) b) You found the girlfriend suitable for you. c) You want to establish lineage. d) Peer pressure/ Family pressure e) Others If there's more than a reason, what pushes you most to marriage?
jwi71 Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 To men who are above 30 who probably got into many relationships prior marriage (long like >3yrs and short like < 3, serious and not serious). You can choose the below. Multiple options allowed. a) You dated for quite some time. (please indicate how long you have dated) b) You found the girlfriend suitable for you. c) You want to establish lineage. d) Peer pressure/ Family pressure e) Others If there's more than a reason, what pushes you most to marriage? E. I was quite the philanderer. I had an embarrassing number of GF's and lovers. I grew up and matured. Pursuing women for sex became boring as the outcome became predictable and routine. After a while, I decided there was more to woman than her genitals and my value was not valued by her willingness to share them. Just a phase I guess. 1
jwi71 Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 So you would just settle because it is the phase of your life you feel like settling You have it backwards. Philandering was a phase. Settling down to be M was not. ... no matter who the woman is??? I have no idea where you got that from. It certainly wasn't from anything I wrote. 2
TiredFamilyGuy Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 (edited) I had 10 pre-marriage relationships, mostly serious. My reasons for marriage were mostly b) It felt like the right girlfriend. But there were other reasons: It happened around age 30: getting older was a bit like being a ball on a slowing roulette wheel: there came a time when the wheel seemed to slow and each slot below, so to speak, came under scrutiny as a potential resting place. Any relationship I had would have had a strong chance of marriage, but there was some volition involved: I broke one relationship because it wasn't serious enough. Also, My peer group of buds was marrying and dispersing. I fell in love. All the factors seemed to coincide. Ironically, I now see that I was much less conflicted about the idea, than my wife-to-be, so it went from my being blind to the prospect of marriage ( a typical state for a man, right up to the point where it seems inevitable, I might add ) to being blind about the flaws and drawbacks. Ah those 20:20 hindsight glasses. Edited January 18, 2013 by TiredFamilyGuy
jwi71 Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I got it because you didn't chose answer b (finding the suitable person to marry with...) so if you don't chose this option obviously is because you don't need to have such a person to settle right? No. It was a phase of life that ended. Then I dated looking at women as more than a life support system for a vagina. Did I stop philandering BECAUSE of a special someone? No. I stopped because it didn't meet my now growing emotional needs. 1
Sugarkane Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 I'm guessing largely social/ peer pressure.
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