Sun Devil Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I have been told that I need to flirt with a girl to get her attracted to me. How do i do it. I never had done this before so I need step by step directions. Do I physically touch her or do I avoid it? How do I do this without appearing creepy?
MrCastle Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 You can't really use canned material because it comes off as cheesy/forced. It really depends on the moment. It's also not just what you say but how you say it. You also have to be aware of body language and see if she's interested in you or open to your flirting. Appropriate light touching works. A touch on the shoulder while talking is appropriate. 3
Author Sun Devil Posted January 18, 2013 Author Posted January 18, 2013 I am not talking about canned material, I just need to know how to flirt. I never had done it before and could use suggestions
NateC Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 Do whatever comes natural to you. If you think about it you'll be too nervous and not let yourself relax because you'll keep wondering if you're doing something wrong.
Author Sun Devil Posted January 18, 2013 Author Posted January 18, 2013 I dont understand. it does not come natural to me. I need to know how to do it. Should I touch her or compliment her? I have no experience with this and need help
NateC Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I dont understand. it does not come natural to me. I need to know how to do it. Should I touch her or compliment her? I have no experience with this and need help Coming from another guy with little experience - trust me - it comes naturally. It's all about body language and how she responds to you.
StanMusial Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I have been told that I need to flirt with a girl to get her attracted to me. How do i do it. I never had done this before so I need step by step directions. Do I physically touch her or do I avoid it? How do I do this without appearing creepy? Impress her with feats of strength. Seriously though it is almost impossible to explain without being involved in the interaction. It's like telling someone how to throw a baseball without showing them how or giving them a ball. 1
jlindemann Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I agree, it will come natural to you. Just avoid awkward topics, do your best to elaborate on questions she asks you. Nothing is worse than seeing an extremely uncomfortable guy trying to flirt wtih you, and you're trying to make conversation and all he is doing is saying "yes" or "no" to your questions. Kind of hard to make small talk if the other person doesn't reciprocate. And for the love of god, do not touch her...anywhere. Not on her shoulder or hand or arm or anywhere. I usually send a signal that it's ok to touch me if I touch you first. I'll let my hand rest on his arm while i'm talking to him, or something of the like. From what I've experienced...guys generally don't mind being touched in a flirtatious manner. But girls will just view it as you trying to get in her pants. You have to wait until you feel she wont feel uncomfortable with it.
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 Psh me? Flirt?? Why never ever!! I'm a shy lil boy... Boobies scare me
jcrew11 Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 Rent some seasons of "Sex and the city" to figure out what girls like in flirting. Smile a lot, make good eye contact, don't stutter, act very sensual. If she's into you, give her a shoulder massage or ask to give her a shoulder massage. Act "kinda gayish and talk about your feelings and her feelings" Make some childish sex jokes, to relax the conversation.
Aslanbek Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 I didn't think I knew how to flirt, but my wife, admittedly paranoid, says I am very flirtatious. I guess you might already know how to flirt, but you don't realize it.
GirlontheLam Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 This is such a hard question. There is no one way to flirt. 100% situational. Let's see, a guy at work has been flirting with me. He has done the following. 1. complimented me on my outfit 2. commented on the length of time that has passed since he last saw me (i.e. you weren't here last week...were you travelling, on vacation?) 3. Asked me about my weekend/plans for the upcoming weekend Now of course, this in itself is pretty meaningless. Combine it with appropriate eye contact, increased smiling, the lack of a previous relationship (or reason for interacting), and overall level of attention, this looked more like flirting than being friendly. It is pretty contextual. Want to learn how to flirt? Spend more time people watching!
somedude81 Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Credit to Friendless-Virgin for the find. 1
somedude81 Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 (edited) Credit to Friendless-Virgin for the find. Of course the best advice is: Just be yourself handsome Edited January 19, 2013 by somedude81
Ruby Slippers Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Compliment her.Ask her questions about herself.Look into her eyes and listen when she's talking. Give her your undivided attention.Smile at her.Touch her, lightly at first. If she's cool with that, you can gradually increase the touching. 1
ErosOcean Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Compliment her.Ask her questions about herself.Look into her eyes and listen when she's talking. Give her your undivided attention.Smile at her.Touch her, lightly at first. If she's cool with that, you can gradually increase the touching. Some good pointers, that I'll add onto. Compliment her. (Yes, but never compliment about her looks. In other words, don't tell her you think she is beautiful. Sorry, but a lot of guys ruined this. It's best that you never compliment a woman on how good she looks even if you think so. The only exception, I would say, is if you are skilled with women, or when you are in a relationship with her. However, you can compliment her outfit, what she's wearing, like accessories. Most women spend a lot of time picking out outfits and accessories so noticing these small things, like earrings, are a huge plus.) Touch her, lightly at first. If she's cool with that, you can gradually increase the touching. (For someone who is learning how to flirt. Do NOT touch a woman at all. Your nervous vibe will make it awkward and creepy. Only touch her if she touches you first.) I didn't think I knew how to flirt, but my wife, admittedly paranoid, says I am very flirtatious. I guess you might already know how to flirt, but you don't realize it. Alright, interesting point on the natural flirt. I'll explain the natural flirt phenomena a little better for the OP... The thing is, the majority of people will mistakenly think someone is flirting with them just because they are being overly nice. The guy that goes into a retail store and one of the young sales woman greets him with a smile and starts talking to him. Then she compliments about his looks and laughs every now and then. Internally, she will only think about getting him to buy something. He, however, will mistake her intentions and think she is flirting with him. This is the natural flirt. When you are being nice, smiling, and talking in a kind manner - a majority of the time people will mistake it for flirting. The friendly cashier, the friendly banker, all of these friendly interactions can be mistaken for flirting. So, in a way, you are naturally equipped to flirt. Just by being nice and friendly - you can be labeled a flirt. If you want to practice flirting. By far the easiest way, from my experience, was by compliments. That means when you go out, you compliment anyone you meet and not just women. You can compliment their clothing, the style of shoes, or whatever piques your interest. This will also build up your ability to feel comfortable talking to people.
PogoStick Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Write a song about how you had a secret crush on her for so long, then serenade her with it on the first date! Or get her name tattooed on your arm and show it to her.
Mr_Flay Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 never compliment about her looks. In other words, don't tell her you think she is beautiful. Sorry, but a lot of guys ruined this. It's best that you never compliment a woman on how good she looks even if you think so. So what, you say you think she's pretty, and she immediately packs up and goes home? What manual is this from? Women love hearing stuff like that!
GravityMan Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Sun Devil, it might help if you lightened up and worked on your ability to be spontaneous and "in the moment". Don't treat flirting like a science experiment or something logical. I agree with those who stated that flirting should come natural to you. While you should be mindful and respectful of boundaries and what's appropriate, at the same time you don't want to overthink flirting or "plan" it out ahead of time - because it's almost certain that your delivery will come across wrong and awkward. There's a ton of different ways to flirt, and everyone has his or her own way of doing it - which may work on some people of the opposite sex and not work on others.
EasyHeart Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 The main thing about flirting is to stay playful and positive. People are attracted to positive energy. And always be sincere. Most people can spot bull****ting from a mile away. 1
xxoo Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 One small step can be greeting a girl you like with a light, flirty nickname. Instead of just "good morning", say "good morning, sunshine". Make sure you smile!
EasyHeart Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Nicknames can be tricky, though. For instance, I've learned from hard experience that women do not like being called "cumdumpster". Who knew??? 4
xxoo Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 Last time I heard a guy do that he called her pumpkin. She called him grandpa. They were only a couple years apart. "Come sit on grandpa's lap, little girl"
Charlie Harper Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 every situation is different and flirt should not be an opening line, for example remember tah Saturday Night Live when Sharon Stone is approached and he says "did I mention I have a Penis" and she goes nuts LOL. The best way is to LISTEN, have a conversation and keep it going with inteligent questions and when she compliments herself, THEN YOU flirt, if she mentions herself as a compliment is a SUREFIRE sign she is selling herself and you MUST go for the bait. Dont touch her, dont stare like crazy needed maniac and also don't make assumptions like "wow you seem so (insert any compliment here) on things you dont know. LISTEN, and let them lead..
Bristolius Posted January 19, 2013 Posted January 19, 2013 I have been told that I need to flirt with a girl to get her attracted to me. How do i do it. I never had done this before so I need step by step directions. Do I physically touch her or do I avoid it? How do I do this without appearing creepy? Your question is sort of like asking how to be funny. Unfortunately flirting works well when you're funny. But you can learn and get better at it. Like humor much of it is personal taste. Some people tell jokes and use sound effects to be funny. And some people don't appreciate that. Same with things like nicknames. Some will and some won't like that So figure out your taste and you'll have success with like-minded women. Also don't restrict flirting to women or to women you're interested in. Be mildly flirtatious in general as you learn how and get comfortable. I think it's best when it's basically kind and light.
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