veggirl Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I hope that is soon! I figure I can job search this summer I don't know if I will be ready to leave the state though.. that might take a year or so?? (I REALLY hope not) at least if I get a job though I will stay occupied. Once you get a "real" job you will be exposed to a lot more people. it will be great for you. I know you have a ridic hard time doing this, but you really should relax for now. you're in a transition phase, so it's all understandable that you are sort of freaking out, but spazzing out really does no good. Worrying about BABIES at 22 is honestly pointless. I know I said this to you before but you are the perfect example of youth is wasted on the young. the thing is, you want marriage/babies sooo badly that you come off as desperate to guys. They pick up on it. You have to quit it or all you will attract is users. Just wait. the real world will be much better for you than the fishbowl of college life is. 1
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted January 17, 2013 Author Posted January 17, 2013 Once you get a "real" job you will be exposed to a lot more people. it will be great for you. I know you have a ridic hard time doing this, but you really should relax for now. you're in a transition phase, so it's all understandable that you are sort of freaking out, but spazzing out really does no good. Worrying about BABIES at 22 is honestly pointless. I know I said this to you before but you are the perfect example of youth is wasted on the young. the thing is, you want marriage/babies sooo badly that you come off as desperate to guys. They pick up on it. You have to quit it or all you will attract is users. Just wait. the real world will be much better for you than the fishbowl of college life is. I am going to try to relax, it is so hard! Everything is happening so fast and I am like losing it! I wish I would have picked a major where I would have a job coming out of school, like a nurse or teacher... I don't know if I will even have a job when I graduate.
clia Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I hope that is soon! I figure I can job search this summer I don't know if I will be ready to leave the state though.. that might take a year or so?? (I REALLY hope not) at least if I get a job though I will stay occupied. You should be job searching right now if you are graduating this spring. In fact, that would be a great way to keep you occupied. Why wait until summer? Or am I misunderstanding?
TheFinalWord Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 (edited) I'm exhausted with dating, and I have been thinking a lot... If I end up being single for like the rest of my life maybe my life will not be totally fully and completely horrible? I mean I could still have a baby, I would just have to go to a sperm bank (which if I am over 30 and still no potential man I will probably do anyways). If I have to be a single mom it wouldn't be that bad.. I can spoil my baby as much as I want, I can pick the names that I want with no interference... I mean what guy would willingly choose the name Paisleigh? I can just do whatever I want in my life on my own. Ideally it would be great for my future babies to have a dad and someone to look up to but I mean a lot of people are raised without dads and it's fine. It would be cool to have a guy who loves me and we take cute facebook pictures and I can brag about how great my BF is but.. oh well. On one level I know I can get a guy... If I want to keep talking to this abusive guy I could, he is nice to me and calls me beautiful and texts me first everyday... but I feel like if I actually do end up going to law school it just isn't realistic. We aren't on the same level, I would like a guy on my level but at the same time I want someone now, I know on POF I am not going to find someone on my level.. I have no idea what to do, I am trying to just let go and be like whatever BUT it is super hard when I see idiots in relationships but whatever.... I guess I can just be single and have sex with a lot of guys who want to have sex with me? It will keep me occupied.. but then I won't be a respectable person who is wife and mother material... I can't win. IB, I like you, I really do So I'm not trying to be mean, but I think you are so thirsty for a relationship/husband that you will come across as desperate and clingy to any man you meet. It will scare guys away even if you do meet a good guy. In a way, you are self-sabotaging the very thing you are trying to acquire. Desperation leads to compromise. The last thing you want to do is marry someone that is not good for you and end up miserable. Being single is 1000x better than being in a disastrous marriage. Why are you even considering someone that is abusive? I think deep down you do not want to compromise and know it is not what is best for your life. You can see the internal struggle in your posting, but it is like you are trying to find a justification for it and if you can't then you'll punish yourself (or someone else) by forming a relationship with an abusive man or have a string of meaningless sex or whatever the self-damaging act may be. Please know there are plenty of loser guys out there than can smell desperation and will leech off of it if you let them. You have to put your guard up; abusers are especially good at finding weak or vulnerable people to prey upon. It's like you are waiting to find a man before you can be happy with your life. You are responsible for your own happiness. You can't put your happiness on any human; no one can shoulder that burden. Even if you find a great guy, or have a child, if you make that the source of your happiness in life you will be disappointed. Please watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUCtm3xIrPQ Edited January 17, 2013 by TheFinalWord 2
Recommended Posts