skylark100 Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I have met a really nice girl, she seems personable and very intelligent, however she told me that she is Jewish. That in itself is not a problem, however I'm Protestant in name only. I'm not very religious at all. Question is, can it work long term? i have heard that jewish parents won't like it much. I come from a city were I have seen these relationships bomb fairly quickly because the Jewish like to protect their heritage, and outsiders are not allowed in. We have yet to discuss how strong her roots are, but it's a convo I think needs to be had. Should we end this before it begins? I need some perspective.
Balzac Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 HaHa this is tricky. First off, it's culture & religion. Secondly most are open to Goy men as the heritage passes woman to child. I know of many "mixed couples" and have LTR w several Jewish women. Some practicing and some not. Often the most fearful, restrictive types of families are more about their nation heritage. Russian Jews say, Brighton Beach, NY. My thought is unless you're shopping on J-Date it's all good. Education can be an issue.
monicaelise Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 (edited) I don't know where you live, but I'm Jewish (ethnically anyway, I don't really follow any religion) and I've only ever dated/married/slept with with gentiles. Was married to a broken Mormon for ten years, had a JW after that, and a number of Catholics before and after that. There have also been a number of generic "Christians" throughout my life. We (women) carry the line, so we don't care. Your babies will be part of "the tribe" regardless of what you are. Edited January 17, 2013 by monicaelise
TheZebra Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I've heard many stories of jews with non-jews; some easy, some not. My best friend only dated jewish guys for a while and she always told me that the guy's parents hated her. She went so far as to convert (and now she regrets it). My aunt is not jewish and she married a jew. They're still happily married and she never converted. His parents seemed ok with it. The kids did not follow any of the traditional coming of age ceremonies of either religion. So it depends. I work for a company where all the top guys are jewish and they are very strict about it. They follow all of the holidays and all of the traditions. The younger ones will sleep with a girl of any religion, but I've heard them talking and when they're ready to settle down they say they'll look for a 'nice jewish girl'.
edgygirl Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I'm Jewish and you're not going to like my response. I really don't want to date non Jews anymore. I have and I didn't like it that much. Life is complicated enough and I really don't want to have to deal with explaining and justifying my culture and background to someone. Even when in LTR with non Jews, eventually they would come up with the sarcastic offending jokes... so, no, I want someone who grew up the same way I did and I can identify with. It feels cozy and that's what I prefer. My family surprisingly is not against it but they would prefer us to be with Jews as it's more practical when deciding how to educate children, celebrating holidays, same world views etc. That being said, there are more and more mixed marriages these days, so if I were in your shoes I would talk with her about how she sees a LTR with a non Jew as soon as you're comfortable with before you end up getting hurt. I did break a few hearts as I knew I wouldn't want to get married to the guys I dated.
TheBigQuestion Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 (edited) If you have no problem dating really spoiled women who usually have some weird sexual hang-up or another, by all means, date a Jewish woman. * I'd have no issue dating someone who was ethnically Jewish (for lack of a better term), but if they actually followed the religion and culture, it simply wouldn't work out for me because I'm decidedly nonreligious (perhaps bordering on anti-religious). It wouldn't matter to me if she was Jewish, Mormon, southern Baptist, or what have you, the presence of religious belief alone would cause serious issues. Since you consider yourself a Protestant in name only, that's something to think about. *Having been a lifelong resident of an area with the largest concentration of Jews in the US, going to a university with one of the largest Jewish populations in the US, and being part of a historically Jewish fraternity, I think I can make these generalizations with sufficient confidence. Edited January 17, 2013 by TheBigQuestion
Recommended Posts