Zammo25 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 How many people have been dumped and you have to face the facts the new guy is far better than you ? You have to take it on the chin. He is better looking, hunkier, better job, better prospects, better wealth and better all round. This hurts like hell. Is just twisting the knife in your gut but you have to take a step back and say " yeah he is the better Man and she is better off with him " and wish them well and leave out of the back door with your tail between your legs. To be sure this is the hardest deck of cards you will ever be dealt but you have to be honest and say " the better Man won "
SharkTooth Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Having all those things doesn't make anyone better than the next person. It's the person, the heart, the soul, and being happy and fun and exciting, caring, and loving. My very first break up was simular to what you descibed and it was bad thinking the way I did. Hell, it made things worse! But looking back at this girl who sailed off in to the sunset with this guy...She is now a recovering heron addict which I was very saddened to hear. Espeacially since she was anti drugs when we were a couple. She is divorced. Has no kids. She contacted me thru FB not to long ago and we talked on the phone. She is also bipolar and it was even harder to listen to her. It was sad... You know how many woman have told me that looks and money, although they play a part, are not even a close second to the person and there personality, confidence, sense of humor? Just about everyone I've known. I hate to hear anyone talk about themselves like that. It simply is not true! Keep your head up. Work toward your goals. Be happy. Be fun. Be exciting! 1
Harradin Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I have it the other way, the guy who my ex left me for, is far inferior to me in every single way. I'm physically fitter(thinner/stronger etc,) better looking, nicer, not manipulative like this guy, better career prospects, more intelligent, in fact the job he does now is IT and he supposedly has high IT qualifications, yet I know more about computers then he does and I only did IT at GCSE! I could go on and on. Trust me, that's painful, because I know I would have made her far happier then she would be now. Its been 4 months since the BU (3 months NC) and I'm pretty sure she's still with that idiot. The worst thing is you don't have a damn clue why.
Vander77 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I have it the other way, the guy who my ex left me for, is far inferior to me in every single way. I'm physically fitter(thinner/stronger etc,) better looking, nicer, not manipulative like this guy, better career prospects, more intelligent, in fact the job he does now is IT and he supposedly has high IT qualifications, yet I know more about computers then he does and I only did IT at GCSE! I could go on and on. Trust me, that's painful, because I know I would have made her far happier then she would be now. Its been 4 months since the BU (3 months NC) and I'm pretty sure she's still with that idiot. The worst thing is you don't have a damn clue why. And you may never know why my friend. Some women that have insecurity problems gravitate to someone more on their level. My ex is exactly like that. She didn't finish high school, play sports, has 2 kids with 2 different baby daddy's...basically led a rough life. Along I come with a great job, benefits, the whole nine yards, and it was great at first. She put me on this pedestal where I felt appreciated and respected. That died away eventually because her own inner turmoil took control and she reverted back to what she is truly like. So ask yourself what type of upbringing this woman had and whether or not you may have been "too good" for her from her point of view. Maybe she's the helping type and doesn't view him as inferior, but someone she can "fix" and make better.
Harradin Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 And you may never know why my friend. Some women that have insecurity problems gravitate to someone more on their level. My ex is exactly like that. She didn't finish high school, play sports, has 2 kids with 2 different baby daddy's...basically led a rough life. Along I come with a great job, benefits, the whole nine yards, and it was great at first. She put me on this pedestal where I felt appreciated and respected. That died away eventually because her own inner turmoil took control and she reverted back to what she is truly like. So ask yourself what type of upbringing this woman had and whether or not you may have been "too good" for her from her point of view. Maybe she's the helping type and doesn't view him as inferior, but someone she can "fix" and make better. Without hijacking this thread, she was bullied for majority of her life, so she never made many friends, so she had horribly low self esteem, she never really got on with her Dad, she had been manipulated before I was around by an older guy who basically lead her on (it didn't go further then cuddling/kissing.) She was a bit clingy at the start of the relationship but I didn't mind it. She'd always tell me that I was the best thing that happened to her, so she was scared she'd made a big mistake and lose me. But then she'd somehow put a mask over it all and she'd still try and cheer people up if they were down, so I guess it came down to a mixture between the two as I treated her like gold, and I was her first boyfriend (first guy who treated her well so maybe she didn't expect or took it for granted.) But then the guy she left me has a talent in manipulating people when they're down and good at trying to turn it around as if its their fault, not his. Its just confusing, because if you got rid of all the insecurity she had and how happy she was when she was with me, there was an amazing girl, it was just rough around the edges.
cottom Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 I tell you what is worse, having the great intelligence, great prospects, great career...you didnt give her enough time though she leaves fr an uglier guy, that is in her friend group, lives 100m away in the same flat and he is on route to drop out of university
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