Louboutin_lover Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I have been in a relationship for just over a year and had always been very open and honest with my partner about wanting a financial agreement as my father was sick and I had previously been married (as had he and lost alot of property due to this). Anyway recently my father passed away and I knew I would inherit some money and more in future when my mother dies, so I want to protect my future with an agreement. When we discussed it it always seems to end in an argument and he says I am money obsessed and he doesn't want my money, all I want is to be safe and have told him to speak to a lawyer to get his own financial advice. He seems convinced that these agreements don't work and if we had a child I would get all of his money and mine - he doesn't seem to realize that I am the only one who will inherit money (he won't) and at this stage the only one likely to loose, as he owns nothing except a huge debt, that said I got the lawyer to add a clause that I would make no claim on his property based on any future child as long as it was stipulated my child would inherit money if he were to die and that this be divided between the child and his son who is 18 (with more to my child if he was younger based on being in a worse position) he seems to think I have issues with his son doing this (my parents had a will like this due to a huge age difference between myself and my brother) my thought was that if we seperated and I claimed no property, if he died when the child was young he wouldn't pay maintenance so there would be more needed for that child, nothing against his existing son. Does this make sense to anyone? Anyway today before I left for work I noticed he left his computer on and there was an album open full of bikini clad women, he claims that was always there and women he knows from Brazil but my issue was he looking at it? Anyway as I was suspicious I checked his MSN messanger and he had messaged a brazilian girl a week ago to say she was beautiful. He doesn't seem to think any of this is inappropriate and that I am in the wrong for checking. I have said he can check my FB or email as I have nothing to hide and I think him getting angry is a deflection technique. Plus I want to have children and the only time he talks about it is he would have one for me but is worried about the potential cost to him - am I too optimisitic to think someone will look at their partner and want to have children based on love and hoping to replicate and join personalities in a child? So tonight I just thought you know what every time I talk about the financial agreement he has some issue with it (and he has not even seen a lawyer) and if he needs to look at someone or message them then he is clearly not happy with me so I have ended it. Just feeling a bit low and need some reassurance that this is the right thing. Having been through a divorce where my husband cheating whilst my father was sick I am starting to wonder what's wrong with me?
mammasita Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 There is nothing wrong with you protecting your assets. When he says he doesnt want your money but wont sign a prenup, I say that's a red flag. Don't get involved with him unless he signs.
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