SJC2008 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 (edited) LOL yeah yall are probabaly saying sjc thinks like a woman lol! Anyway, it's my last semster of school thank god and my "dream" if you will is to meet a nice women in school and get to know her and eventually get with her. A lot of people meet their SO's at work and school so bascially IMO many R's do start as friends friends/acquaintances first. So... last semester in one of my classes there was this girl who I was VERY attracted to. The kind of attraction where I'd steal as many glances during class as I could without getting cought if you catch my drift. I never really had a way to talk to her as she sat on the other side of the room. The closest I came was when she came over and talked to a couple guys I was talking with after class. Fast forward to yesterday, I'm running late for class on the first day which I hate. It means I'm gonna walk in and everyones's gonna see me! I get in class and it doesn't look like there are any seats AT ALL. I go toward the back and the only open chair has a purse on it so I ask the girl sitting next to the purse if anyone is sitting there and she takes the purse down and I sit down. Well once I sat down I noticed who it was and it was HER! What are the odds of that? We have a class together and the only available seat in the whole room was next to her. Probably just a coincidence but man if that doesn't seem like fate I don't know what does. It's a busy class so not much time for small talk but I did ask her (already knowing) if she was in xyz class last sem and she said yeah and we talked about how we did etc. Edited January 16, 2013 by SJC2008 edit
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 The only thing I believe in is reality. Some have it and some don't. I am however happy for you
Author SJC2008 Posted January 16, 2013 Author Posted January 16, 2013 Well I'm not sold on destiny either but it's one hell of a coincidence and would be awesome if something were to blossom out of it but I'm not getting my hopes up. Hell, she may sit somewhere else next class!
soccerrprp Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Many people believe in destiny. I sometimes wonder why things happen the way they do and at times that are peculiar, but not a full-time believer in it. The idea of destiny reeks a little too much in the direction of passiveness. I believe in creating or having a heavy hand in my own "destiny." BUT, I do not choose the people who cross my path in life and in what manner. So as I forge and maintain relationships with people that simply come my way, i sometimes wonder....
somedude81 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Absolutely not. I've already met my dream girl and had her in my life for two years. She also kept popping up in my life after taking off for a while. It really did seem like fate that I would keep running into her. Though in the end I could not her to date me and she eventually left my life for good. Haven't seen her in over a year and odds are I'd never talk to her again. Every now and then I meet other girls who I feel would be a great match, and guess what, they don't want to date me either. So either it's my destiny to meet great girls and be nothing more than friends with me, or destiny/fate is a load of BS.
Harradin Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Everything happens for a reason, but I don't put it down to destiny/fate/coincidence because everyone makes their own choices, so if whatever happens they made that choice.
charlietheginger Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 You got lucky. Not fate , destiny or some god smiling at you. Chances are your crush will become a headache when You try to hard and she shoots you down for a more Attractive guy. Then your destiny will become torture when you have to sit in a class with the girl who rejected you
Author SJC2008 Posted January 16, 2013 Author Posted January 16, 2013 I couldn't date her now if I wanted to (if she reciprocated) anyway. It is just too awkward for me to date a classmate. What if there's an argument or something? The awkwardness in class would be too much for me. I can use it as an opportunity to get to know her though. Just because I'm physically attracted to her doesn't mean I'll be attracted to her personality or be compatible with her.
todreaminblue Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 LOL yeah yall are probabaly saying sjc thinks like a woman lol! Anyway, it's my last semster of school thank god and my "dream" if you will is to meet a nice women in school and get to know her and eventually get with her. A lot of people meet their SO's at work and school so bascially IMO many R's do start as friends friends/acquaintances first. So... last semester in one of my classes there was this girl who I was VERY attracted to. The kind of attraction where I'd steal as many glances during class as I could without getting cought if you catch my drift. I never really had a way to talk to her as she sat on the other side of the room. The closest I came was when she came over and talked to a couple guys I was talking with after class. Fast forward to yesterday, I'm running late for class on the first day which I hate. It means I'm gonna walk in and everyones's gonna see me! I get in class and it doesn't look like there are any seats AT ALL. I go toward the back and the only open chair has a purse on it so I ask the girl sitting next to the purse if anyone is sitting there and she takes the purse down and I sit down. Well once I sat down I noticed who it was and it was HER! What are the odds of that? We have a class together and the only available seat in the whole room was next to her. Probably just a coincidence but man if that doesn't seem like fate I don't know what does. It's a busy class so not much time for small talk but I did ask her (already knowing) if she was in xyz class last sem and she said yeah and we talked about how we did etc. I know what i dont believe in, i dont believe in coincidence,I don't believe in fated lives,because with free will we have the right to choose,I do believe that everything happens for a reason , those reasons being, for us to choose what to do, circumstances or happenings that lead us down different paths, but ultimately that path choice is ours....god gave us those rights so we would grow and learn ......otherwise we would all be clones and life would be a clone of someone elses life...those choices are what can make life beautiful or tragic...we need that contrast or we would not have joy or sorrow and know the difference between the two..... Thank god we are not clones that we have our own free will to choose the right path or the left path, or stay in the middle.Decisions we make turn on a dime and we have dozens of them, millions in the earth life we live, sometimes we do it right and sometimes we have to learn by our mistakes. The circumstance that happened that you sat down next to a girl you were attracted to wasn't destiny.......you made the choice to sit down, now circumstance will give you more choices to make, do you tell her do you not, do you take it further do you not, and each choice is yours to make, its a wonderful thing the ability to choose what to do, those choices however inconsequential they seem, are what makes our memories and shapes as human beings....all these thoughts i give to the grace of god and his choice to give us agency or free will to grow.......i wish you the best with your choices,all the inconsequential looking ones and all the obvious ones, and whatever choices you make, that you will find the positives in them......deb
iris219 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I'd like to believe that we're completely in control of our own destiny, but I'm not so sure. Ultimately, I believe the universe has a plan for us. It may not be the one we want, but once we start embracing this plan, our lives will get easier and be less stressful. OP, do I think the girl you mention is your destiny? No, not necessarily. I feel like destiny, if it exists, doesn't work like that. We can desire things all we want, but fate usually manifests itself in ways we could never imagine. Rarely, have I ever gotten what I yearned for in the way I expected.
charlietheginger Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I couldn't date her now if I wanted to (if she reciprocated) anyway. It is just too awkward for me to date a classmate. What if there's an argument or something? The awkwardness in class would be too much for me. I can use it as an opportunity to get to know her though. Just because I'm physically attracted to her doesn't mean I'll be attracted to her personality or be compatible with her. Problem is at her age getting to know her will only Get you friendzoned. Its like baseball You step up to bat take a swing and make a hit or strikeout and move on. Standing at the plate as a batter Talking to the pitcher and making friends with him Will not get you anywhere. If.anything she might like you physical and be into you But if you lalie gag around often women get turned off.
Author SJC2008 Posted January 16, 2013 Author Posted January 16, 2013 Like I said I don't necessarily beleive in destiny but a "helping hand mabye" and the rest is on you. It still comes down to what you do and make out of the situation. Chances were that I would of never seen her again. I was even wondering if I'd have her for a class this term and I did. The fact that the only open seat in the class was next to her is almost eerie lol. It's a good thing I didn't notice it was her util I sat down. If I did before I probably wouldn't of even been able to ask her if someone was sitting there lol! 1
Author SJC2008 Posted January 16, 2013 Author Posted January 16, 2013 You got lucky. Not fate , destiny or some god smiling at you. Chances are your crush will become a headache when You try to hard and she shoots you down for a more Attractive guy. Then your destiny will become torture when you have to sit in a class with the girl who rejected you This is one reason (on top of being too shy) I never pursued classmates. Even if it did work out the awkwardness in class would be too much for me if we were having problems or an argument or something!
TheZebra Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Sometimes it sure feels that way. I think it depends on your outlook in life; whether you believe in it or not. I'm generally an optimistic person, so I often look at things that happen to me and think 'wow, I'm so fortunate that X, Y, and Z happened, otherwise I wouldn't be in this situation'. Thus why it feels like destiny.
ThaWholigan Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 We have paths we can choose, but ultimately I believe that fate is simply life happening to you when you don't have full control over it. Unless you're mono-theist and you put your faith in God. Either way, there are ways in which you can affect your own direction in your life and the things that happen in it as opposed to "fate" moving you around like a chess piece .
Malia25 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 This is one reason (on top of being too shy) I never pursued classmates. Even if it did work out the awkwardness in class would be too much for me if we were having problems or an argument or something! I believe in serendipity....or at least the whole romantic aspect of it. I think when "acts of fate" happen, it's really all in our heads. We romanticize. We fantasize. We are dreamers. But in the end, it possibly all means nothing. Before I got with my ex, we were just friends. He left for months and I didn't see him again until the summer. I actually ran into him 3x in one week in all kinds of random places. I believed at the time fate brought us together again. But now he's out of my life. So did fate bring us together just to break my heart? Meh, I don't think so. Life is cray. Good luck with her though. You shouldn't deny yourself relationships with classmates. College classes have anywhere from 20-300 students per class. It doesn't have to be awkard. Just sit far away from them.
ScreamingTrees Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I believe that even if you can make your own destiny, that's just a part of your "destiny".. Perhaps you taking control is exactly what was supposed to happen. I'm sure that it's possible that every moment may be stored somewhere only to re-occur over and over again. If that were the case, everything in the future has already happened, and what will be will be.. We wouldn't know, because we're only conscious of the moment that we're in and possibly the moments pre-ceding that moment. Might as well just enjoy it for what it is, and try to improve our lives.
Bristolius Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 A term related to destiny is fate. As in fatalism and fatalistic. We are tossed about like leaves with only the illusion of free will. If you buy in, it's kind of discouraging. Resist this kind of thinking.
xxoo Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Like I said I don't necessarily beleive in destiny but a "helping hand mabye" and the rest is on you. It still comes down to what you do and make out of the situation. Luck comes into play, but it is definitely up to the individual to capitalize on it.
Author SJC2008 Posted February 1, 2013 Author Posted February 1, 2013 Anyway... The next class she was late so she sat somewhere else and we haven't sat next to eachother since. The closest was during our last class when she was two seats over, she was talking to a guy and she gave him her phone number, he didn't ask she just gave it to him. She's too young anyway, probably 21-22.
KungFuJoe Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 I'm not superstitious, or religious, or any other kind of ious. But when I think about how I ended up with my wife (I'm not gonna rehash the whole story but let's just say it was a one in a million shot) and how amazing my life is today because of her.... ...it makes me believe in destiny.
somedude81 Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 Anyway... The next class she was late so she sat somewhere else and we haven't sat next to eachother since. The closest was during our last class when she was two seats over, she was talking to a guy and she gave him her phone number, he didn't ask she just gave it to him. She's too young anyway, probably 21-22. Hah, not too young for me. As for destiny itself. I'd only believe in it if a girl who was my type, asked me out.
Mrlonelyone Posted February 1, 2013 Posted February 1, 2013 I don't believe in destiny or fate. There is such a thing as luck, which is just the random processes of the world falling your way once in a great while. There is a simple reason I don't believe in destiny. For me, if I have a destiny it must be to live and die having never known what it's like to be really truly loved. So OP, I'd say don't read to much into where she sits, or that she's in your class. Talk to her, ask her for her contact info and if she gives it to you everything is good. Ask her out and see where things lead. If you have a destiny it could well turn out that this woman is just a stepping stone to the true love of your life, or a lesson to be learned on the way.
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